H.B. Woodrose & MDMA
Citation: trippMcNippers. "The Elsa Flip: An Experience with H.B. Woodrose & MDMA (exp109527)". Erowid.org. Apr 18, 2017. erowid.org/exp/109527
To set the scene, I was in the midst of what I now can see was a futile attempt to glean some answers from the pretty lights—a months-long cycle of blasting my head apart with reckless abandon and sifting through the pieces in the hopes that some magical purpose for my life would emerge. It didn’t work, and I got lucky—I’m on the other side of that particular idiocy, but I say all this to illustrate the unfortunate shade that was cast over this period of my life.
Several other people were sucked into and eventually hurt by this pitiful, desperate ploy for some sort of an identity—I will not attempt to break down all of my relationships at this point in my life here, but they were not in great shape (which was entirely my fault). My roommate, A, is an incredibly nice guy; he and I lived together a condo owned by his family and I paid a fraction of the worth of rent—purely because of him. Good vibes. Our friend who was responsible for the chemistry that made this trip possible, B, was introduced to me by A—he is also a dear friend.
In terms of physical setting, I was really all over the place over the course of this trip, ranging from the apartment of my friend, who will be B, to my own place, to downtown collegetownville, Alabama. Going into the trip I gave virtually no thought to the things going into my body, eating pizza and some chips at around 11:00 in the morning. I spent little energy or time preparing mentally for this journey,
1:45:00 – Having ridden to my friend B’s apartment with my roommate, A, I began my day by consuming what could be calculated as approximately 43-45 seeds’ worth of extract, seeing as each gel capsule held 0.90mL and I consumed 8 of these capsules. 500 seeds went into the extraction, and the resulting alcohol tincture totaled 85mL. Anyhow, things went smoothly aside from mild, immediate stomach discomfort from both the alcohol and the minor amount of cinnamon extract we had mixed in to the tincture.
I would like to be clear that this idea was notably ill-advised, seeing as no one else had tried the extract yet, at any dosage at all. “Monumentally stupid” are the words coming to mind, now that I see that on paper. Jesus. Don’t try shit like this. I was relying on the intermediate chemistry skills of my friend to the tune of a dose that could easily have cause some health problems, which is never an advisable route to take. Against all odds, however, I lucked out and had quite the ride.
1:55:00 — Tingling hints of euphoria begin to surface, as do very slight shimmers and waves around my peripheral vision as I am driven back to my apartment.
2:00:00 — Time has become entirely meaningless in the sense that I seem incapable of determining where exactly I am on the timeline of the night. Things will remain this way for the duration of this experience.
2:45:00 — Start smoking bubble hash and the visual distortion really begin to kick. I consumed what I would estimate to be around .25 grams, and shortly after, the walls begin showing ingrained, morphing geometric patterns, sometimes moving in time with my breath when I drew my attention to it.
2:55:00 — I am quite heavily inebriated at this point. I walk outside to look at the cloudy sky; it was a dull, blurry gray, and patterns covered it. The designs were incredibly intricate, seeming to interact with whatever was already there rather than replacing it—fitting the contours of the clouds, flinging slight color alterations over various patches. I definitely experienced the slight and familiar difficulty with conversations that seems to be inherent in a HBWR trip; however, I felt relatively lucid. For the duration of this experience I retained an impression of noticeably heightened comprehension in comparison to prior HBWR trips.
2:15:00 — About this time, the experience as a whole began to turn darker—I remember several moments when sitting in our living room that I looked up at the wall and my entire field of vision quickly became clouded with small, buzzing particles of infinitesimal size. More remarkable, however, were missing patches in my peripheral that looked bottomless, stretching into black eternity. It was around this time that A, the roommate, agreed to take me to get some nitrous canisters.
2:20:00 — Our trip in the car was a lot to take in. I couldn’t do much but sit back in my seat and watch things unfold. The colors of everything in the head shop and in my surroundings as we drove there were exhilarating.
2:40:00 — After wishing love to the hippies at the shop, we were headed back to the house with three 50-packs of gas. Playing music in the car was…..an explosive experience. It was explosive in the sense that the lyrics, instrumentation and every other aspect of the sound heard was far more complicated than I had previously realized. Accompanying these feelings was the enticing sense that I could finally understand the music’s meaning in full.
2:55:00 —The whip-it’s ushered in a new and massively dissociating leg of the entire experience. This was the part of the HBWR trip that I would designate as the peak, and at this point I began leaving the room even without nitrous; it took maybe 30 seconds to a minute for me to dissolve into a field of absolutely mind-boggling shapes. These shapes would shift far too rapidly for me to keep track. They flipped from cartoonish in nature to static-filled and dark in an instant, nearly approaching the pace of those characteristic of an experience with DMT. The nitrous obviously multiplied the visual distortions I was experiencing, whether I had my eyes closed or not. I swam in and out of reality, dissolving entirely and jumping back to the couch.
I swam in and out of reality, dissolving entirely and jumping back to the couch.
Typical nitrous epiphanies, the limited memories I was able to retain from these journeys were foggy, but felt as though I could have solved every problem I have ever had in the fleeting moments of this peak state. My view always included a significant element of cloudiness accompanied with an impression of some sort of vibrational energy that I suggested to myself was an ability to see the atoms or basic particles of whatever geometric designs were presented to me.
3:15:00 —At this point the first “epiphany” that I actually retained during the trip came to me, rather than being discovered in retrospect as most of them have been. I came out of a nitrous journey, and there was some sort of a feeling that almost seemed foreign to me even though I knew it was a product of my brain; I began to feel slightly sad, and I briefly contemplated my situation in life and the drugs I was doing and what my family would think. After about 30 seconds to 1 minute, a sharp change began to lift my mood, and soon thereafter I felt like a king. I would almost say that I began to sense god-like qualities in myself, and I felt that I had some intrinsic quality/ability that would carry me through life no matter what happened. There was immense power in the fact that I had this and no one else does. This concept came to the forefront of my mind as a truth that was already there, rather than a gift resulting from the experience.
This particular instance was the strongest case of several for true ego death. I believe that this discovery of my own “god-like abilities” was the reconstruction of my personal faith from whatever my consciousness had become during the nitrous trip. This “ability” I describe was what I believe to be the Holy Spirit inside me. I believe that God’s spirit is entwined with my spirit body because I decided to believe that Jesus redeemed my soul, and that this is the “thing” that I carry through life which no one on earth or anywhere else can take from me.
Another notion that was impressed upon me during this particular “nitrous journey” was that I was outside of my own brain; I was convinced (whether it was happening or not) that I had the ability to watch my own thoughts unfold as if they were someone else’s. I briefly but genuinely convinced myself that some part of me had traveled to another place in space and/or time.
6:45:00 — I imbibed ¾ of a pressed ecstasy pill, which was a Red Supreme. We did not test these presses chemically, but due to past personal experiences along with those of some friends had tried them before and believed them to be the real deal. I had intended on consuming only two halves, but because I mistakenly believed that a half-piece of the press was only a quarter, I went for the big dog. It was a fairly pleasant surprise for me when my roommate realized there was an additional quarter missing from our stuff when he went to start his roll.
7:45:00 — Music began taking on new mind-bending aspects; I was playing songs on my stereo system in my apartment and decided to throw on some South Park. The MDMA had most definitely began to take effect at this point, and visuals were amplified once again. This was a combination well worth trying, but I suspect that dangerous physiological symptoms like vasoconstriction may emerge if using seeds instead of an extract. That being said, there was no notable nausea for the entire duration of the trip, even during the MDMA come-up! My friend B did an absolutely fantastic job on the extract; I had no nausea.
10:15:00 — My roommate A and I finally head out to the bar, where our friend C was DJ-ing for the night. We assisted him and the other dj, Q, in acquiring ½ of a press each.
12:00:00 — After dancing to C’s music on the outdoor dance floor out back for a while, I headed to the smoker’s pit for a quick change of scenery and to give myself some cancer. While there, I started chatting with Q, and our conversation was incredible. He’d had a stroke at birth, and accompanying his slurred speech and sloped lips, his hand was permanently folded as can happen with the victim of a stroke. And he DJ’s. Which was possibly the coolest thing I had heard in my life. Empathy was at an all-time high, as he was also rolling off the pill I helped him acquire, so I felt like I had known the guy for years.
1:00:00 — Q went on to give C break, and he came right out of the gate with some aggressive stuff that absolutely made me lose my cool. The spectacular part about this point of the night was the level of understanding with which I was processing Q’s voice which was permeating the set he was performing. Here was this fantastic human being who had just detailed the intricate difficulties of life with a struggle as significant as his, electrifying the air with the art that he wanted the crowd to hear. It was positively magnificent.
I am not a good dancer by any stretch, and I usually let that knowledge invade my ability to let loose when I am around people I know (eg. at the bars), but that night I was able to let go. I felt the energy of the man behind the turntables and I was loving every minute of it.
2:30:00 — We started heading home, not because the music was dying down, but because A was in the process of getting lucky and I was getting tired. I also was not opposed to going home and smoking a little more hash, so we voyaged back to the apartment.
~3:00:00 — Having consumed at least a half-gram of hash, I laid down and tried to fall asleep. I want to note that throughout the MDMA experience I was able to play very vivid music in my head, which became more important when I was lying in bed. I was hearing intricate details of every song I tried to remember, and this highlighted the clarity with which I was able to recall any memory I wanted. I would estimate that I fell asleep after about an hour of lying in my bed.
The glory of LSA comes with the afterglow, so much so that I am tempted to view the trip as something to get through so that I can enjoy the vast amount of learning and healing that occurs during the hours and days following the experience. I felt, after this journey, that I had been rearranged in quite a positive manner; meditation the next morning brought about a marked decrease in the amount of time that it took me to reach a placid, almost euphoric headspace.
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