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Discovering the Meaning of Life
H.B. Woodrose & Cannabis
Citation:   yaboy. "Discovering the Meaning of Life: An Experience with H.B. Woodrose & Cannabis (exp112473)". Erowid.org. Sep 30, 2022. erowid.org/exp/112473

 
DOSE:
11 seeds oral H.B. Woodrose (ground / crushed)
    smoked Cannabis  
BODY WEIGHT: 65 kg
Last night I tripped on 11 Hawaiian Baby Woodrose seeds.

Age: 18 (almost 19)
Number of seeds: 11
Other drugs used: Cannabis
Method of consumption: Seeds were crushed with a hammer and put in a bottle of water. After completing this short process, I drank the mixture.
Setting(s): A sort of canyon near my friend's village in Israel, a small park in his village, my friend's house.
Start time of trip: Mixture was consumed at 6:35 PM. I started to feel the physical effects at 7:00 PM, and the mental effects at around 8:15 PM.
Peak: 11 PM, approximately. This is a rough estimate because from 9 PM to 1 AM I was tripping absolute balls.
Comedown: 1:00 AM
Completely sober: Around 2:30 AM

The last time I tripped was a few months ago and I took 5 seeds, I had a strong experience but nothing memorable. However, the last time I tripped at my friend's village was actually around this time, a year ago. That time I took 10 seeds.

I ingested my seed mixture at 6:35 PM. I have stuck with my method of crushing up seeds and putting them in water, because it's never failed me, I just have to deal with the nausea and stomach pains. It's an easy method and if you guys can deal with the discomfort, then I highly recommend it. Also, this trip I successfully forced myself to vomit early on, so this greatly aided my stomach pains.

Anyway, so after drinking the seed mixture, I grabbed my backpack containing my jacket, pipe, lighter, and weed, some tissues, and also a bottle of water. Then my friend and I set out on our way. We walked 10 minutes to the canyon.

I'm not sure if I can call it a canyon but it's basically just a large valley. A bridge runs over the valley, where trains pass, occasionally. There's also a highway and some rough trails next to the valley. Not the ideal trip spot because of the cars and occasional train passing by, but I've tripped here before and it works fine for me.

So my friend and I sat on the rocks and talked a bit to pass the time. We didn't talk much at the beginning, I was mostly just waiting for the trip to start. I took some pictures of the scenery, and just sat there, thinking. My stomach started acting up, so I tried forcing myself to throw up. On previous trips I've also tried to forcibly vomit, but never succeeded. Lucky for me, this time I succeeded after sticking a finger down my throat. I threw up once, then after half an hour or so, I threw up again. It's worth noting that I've never experienced any sort of vasoconstriction from these seeds. Not even discomfort in my legs or arms, only in my stomach. It could be because I work out daily and ride my bike to work every day as well, so I get increased blood flow to my veins, but this is just a theory.

Anyway, during the initial two or so hours of the pre-trip, I felt kind of shitty, kind of depressed... My stomach pains didn't help my thoughts, either. After throwing up, I instantly felt better, though not completely.

I pulled out my phone and put on some music to lighten the mood. Every 10 minutes or so I got up to urinate It was very difficult to urinate; it hurt to piss and I could barely produce a drop of urine.

Now this is when the trip started taking effect.

After I vomited for the last time, I started feeling better and I still wasn't tripping, so I decided to smoke some weed. I pulled out my pipe and I lit it up. I passed it to my friend, who took a hit, but he had his own glass pipe so he preferred to use that one.
After two hits I was already stoned. I have a natural low tolerance to weed, which I'm very thankful for. I just stared at my feet and thought about things.

I like taking pictures in general, but especially when I'm stoned. So I was stoned, still not tripping though, and I decided to take some pictures of the valley. Now I'm taking pictures, and I start feeling the effects of the LSA in my body, and slowly, in my mind as well. My body felt lighter and I felt light headed, kind of like I was floating, a bit. I started touching the rocks on the ground, and the weeds growing in between the rocks. I started touching my face and hair, it felt so nice.

I became euphoric and happy, the weed and the LSA had combined to produce great effects. I told my friend what I felt. I was just happy and free, I had no problems, I was alive and that was it. These feelings were short lived, however.

At 8:50 PM or so, I started playing with some rocks on the ground. I was definitely tripping at this point. I built a small tower, and I paid careful attention to the placement of the rocks and how they were arranged. I continued touching the rocks until around 9:15 PM. Now the trip was in full effect.

I can't tell you guys what exactly happened from this moment on, but I started experiencing classic LSA effects: Thought loops, internal monologues, paranoia as well. Whenever I trip, I always think the trip will last forever and I'll be in a mental hospital for the rest of my life. But when the trip inevitably ends, I laugh at myself for being so foolish, although I'm always relieved when it ends.

I closed my eyes and I saw patterns. I described to my friend how I felt: Our lives are like a TV, they're only stuck on one channel (our personal lives). But when I was tripping, I felt like I was stuck on a million different channels at once. My mind was racing and my thoughts kept jumping around. I couldn't focus on anything. Whenever I tried to, I lost track of what I was talking about.

Now I was still lying on the ground, touching the rocks and pebbles. I felt incredibly tired, but I tried to stay awake. I kept talking to my friend but he obviously had no idea what I was going on about, I probably sounded like a madman. I kept asking him when the trip would end. I kept talking until about 10 PM when I decided to try and sleep, even though my friend said it was a bad idea. Again, this part of the trip report may not be 100% accurate, because I was in another dimension, on another planet...

But I do know that at some point around this time I drifted in and out of a fitful sleep. Or was it even sleep? My body felt so good, and breathing in and out felt amazing. The feel of my chest rising and falling was like seeing waves rolling and crashing on the beach at night. My friend was stoned, though, as he had taken cannabis oil at the same time that I took my LSA mixture. He also smoked weed with me before, so he was just sitting in a chair and playing with his phone, enjoying himself. I tried to ask him if he was OK and if everything was good, and I managed to express that to him, with my limited language skills.

The LSA had rendered me a babbling fool, I was a kid or a mental patient, I was in another universe, I was inside of my soul and inside of a million different other souls at the same time...

I kept getting up to piss, but I couldn't piss. I walked back over to where I was lying down, and lay back down and tried to sleep.

Now I guess it was around 10:30, give or take. I don't remember much. The things I felt and the things I experienced during these few hours cannot be put into words, but I'm doing the best I can. I remember telling my friend that I felt like I was in the afterlife and that I was viewing my life from the realm of the afterlife. I was in a thousand places at once, in a thousand timelines... I think the most accurate way to describe it is that I was inside of my soul.

I saw visuals, but they weren't full-blown hallucinations. Most of the hallucinations I experienced during this time were internal. The visuals I saw were geometric in shape and formed complex patterns. A recurring motif in this trip and in my past trips (although I never paid much attention to it until now) was the motif of an eye. When I saw these geometric patterns, many of them featured an eye. One I remember vividly was an array of elongated hexagons of some short. Their colors blended with my surroundings, green, gray, dark blue... And in the center of each hexagon was an eye.

At around this time, I reached another phase of the trip. I seemed to have woken up, I didn't feel as tired as I did before.

Everything suddenly clicked. I realized the meaning of life, now. I figured everything out. I figured out the meaning of life and I felt at peace with myself. The thing is, there is no meaning of life. There is no 'goal', no objective... You just live your life and that's it. That's the entire meaning of life. People always see life as complicated and confusing, but last night I realized how simple life really is. We are alive because we are alive, there's no other reason. I don't think we'll ever figure out why we are here and why we exist, but I know now that it doesn't even matter. We are born, we live, we die. That's how simple life is.

After reaching enlightenment, I had entered another phase of the trip, the second to last phase. The time was around 11:00 PM. I felt well enough to stand up and so my friend suggested that we walk from the valley to a small park near his house. On the way back from the valley, we spotted some graffiti, so we both took some photos.

As we entered the village again, I recall seeing the streetlamps and houses and laughing at it all. I put on some more music on my phone, and my friend and I walked to the park.

We got to the small park and we sat down on a bench. I got up to piss and when I went back to the bench, my friend offered me a cracker from a pack that I had given him before. I accepted it, but my mouth was so dry and eating the cracker felt so weird, that I don't know how much I actually consumed.

I considered smoking a cigarette, but my friend convinced me not to. Not that it mattered, anyway. I'm not a smoker, but I do enjoy the occasional puff when I'm stoned, maybe once a week I have a few puffs from a friend's cigarette.

We left the park and began the walk back to my friend's house. I was still tripping hard but I had regained some of my speech and I could talk fairly normally again.

Eventually we got to my friend's house, at around 11:50. His mother was still awake, but I wasn't afraid of her finding out that I was high. I was at peace with myself and with everyone around me.
I was at peace with myself and with everyone around me.
We entered his house and his mother seemed to avoid me, but I could tell it was because she suspected that I was high and she didn't want to cause me any trouble. My friend and I went into his room and I took off my shoes and socks. I went into the living room with my friend and I collapsed on the couch, euphoric. My friend turned on the TV and we watched an episode of a show called F Is For Family. While watching the show, everything around me, including the show, seemed without a flaw. It's a bit hard for me to explain what this means, so that's the only way I can explain it.

Now after this stage, there's not much more to tell. I was tripping, watching TV, happy... And this continued up until around 1:30 AM where we decided to go to bed. And the morning after, I woke up sober, but I felt calmer and more at peace, and as I'm typing this, I feel the same.

This was the most powerful experience I've ever had with LSA, actually, probably the most beautiful experience I've ever had in my entire life. Now I see things through different eyes. Before I tripped last night, I knew that life was meaningless, I was into nihilism and existentialism. I told myself that life has no meaning, but I couldn't prove it, could I? After discovering these philosophies, I became more carefree and even more happy. But I still couldn't disregard everything that I'd been taught since I was a kid... That one should grow up, get a job, go to college, start a family, live a conventional life... It's hard to just let go of things you've been told your entire life. But now I can honestly say that a veil has been lifted.

Now I have no more reason to do LSA. I have learned all that I could from this substance. If I were to trip again, I wouldn't learn anything new, and I think it's pointless to try. You could say I had a sort of breakthrough on this trip.

It's hard for me to put into words just exactly what I learned on my trip, and I don't remember many details, but I will never forget the feeling of infinite calmness and peacefulness that I felt last night.

Exp Year: 2018ExpID: 112473
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: Sep 30, 2022Views: 342
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H.B. Woodrose (26), Cannabis (1) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Combinations (3), General (1)

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