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Just Let Go
LSD & Salvia divinorum
by Goddess Mode
Citation:   Goddess Mode. "Just Let Go: An Experience with LSD & Salvia divinorum (exp103246)". Erowid.org. Dec 20, 2016. erowid.org/exp/103246

 
DOSE:
T+ 0:00
8 mg oral Galantamine  
  T+ 0:00 600 mg oral alpha-GPC  
  T+ 0:00   repeated smoked Cannabis  
  T+ 0:00 10 mg oral Hydrocodone (pill / tablet)
  T+ 0:00 325 mg oral Acetaminophen (pill / tablet)
  T+ 0:40 4 mg oral Ondansetron (pill / tablet)
  T+ 1:45 4 hits   LSD (blotter / tab)
  T+ 2:45 4 hits   LSD (blotter / tab)
  T+ 4:00 2 hits   LSD (blotter / tab)
  T+ 0:00 1 bowl smoked Products - Spice-Like Smoking Blends  


For this experience, I really felt the desire to trip hard. For three weeks after the last trip I wrote about, I was totally buzzing on the afterglow. I had been re-examining several very big aspects of my life, and coming to terms with things that had bothered me for years. At the same time though, I felt I was also uncovering other issues in me that had faded with time, and after a while I just wanted to trip again to work on further accepting myself. At the end of those three weeks, and one week before this experience, I had ended up taking six and a half hits with a couple of close friends. It was an intense and moving experience, but a lot of my focus was spent watching the friend who was having her first LSD experience ever, and I kind of wished I had saved that sort of dose for an alone trip. One message that that trip did leave me with though was to laugh more, which I've really taken to heart and benefited from. But mostly, it left me with a feeling of wanting more, especially after how hard my friend was tripping.

With that trip I had taken 200 mg of vitamin B, 400 mg of choline, and 8 mg of galantamine, and I felt it might have actually enhanced the experience to a degree, so this time I decided to use 600 mg of alpha-GPC and 2400 mg of piracetam before dosing. I also took a 10 mg Vicodin for a headache with 4 mg of Zofran for nausea, and I had been smoking weed all day. My mindset was one of just wanting to go all out and really enjoy something, so I excitedly planned to take up to ten hits of LSD. I cut a ten strip out and then divided it up to four, four, and two. This was all from T+0:00 to T+1:45.

T+1:45 - I took the first four hits. I walked around for a bit, preparing myself mentally for the experience.

T+2:45 - I was starting to feel the LSD creep in but I knew I could *definitely* take more, so I took the next four hits as well. I'm pretty sure at some point after that I smoked some more weed to kick the experience up a notch, and I was definitely getting strong visuals. Much more than I had in a long time actually; they seem to have been increasing along with my sensitivity to the psychedelic state in general lately. I remember just thinking about how beautiful they were.

T+4:00 - I'm already starting to trip pretty hard at this point, but I decided to take the next two hits as well. I'm not actually sure how much of a dose I got from them though; I'm sure it was something, but I can't say for certain it was the whole thing. I left the hits in my mouth for a little while, but then I remember becoming confused by what I was chewing and then deciding that I really didn't need more when I pulled it out to look at it, and then threw it away. So who knows? All I can say is that I definitely kept tripping harder and harder after that point.

For a while after that, I really lost my perception of time. I can't really say what happened when. What I do know is that everything started to get very confusing very quickly, and I decided that I wanted to kick it up a notch. I grabbed an old smoking blend I had saved called '42 Degrees Green', which I want to say has JWH-250 in it but I couldn't say for sure. I smoked a bowl of it and the trip certainly did become more intense, but I felt like it was still just pushing up against that breaking point, but not actually going through it. Tripping is always very sexual for me and it sort of felt like the build up to an intense orgasm without the full release. The way it impacted the trip was all together not too different from the way that the weed was, just a bit stronger. It was bringing out the sexual edge a lot though. At that point, I decided that I wanted to smoke some of the salvia extract that I had prepared for myself....

I can no longer get salvia where I am, but I still had just a little bit of this extract left from when I could, about enough for three bowls. Unfortunately I don't remember the strength of the extract, I just remember that it was enough to do something for me. I have had an odd relationship with salvia.... I would say that it's probably the hallucinogen that has had the most reverse tolerance in me comparable to LSD, though that's not surprising based on everything I've heard about it. It really does seem though like one experience is just a continuance of the last to me, for both of these drugs.

When it comes to me and salvia, I've nearly always had the exact same experience with it: my experience of reality is replaced by one static frame in a void, an image that is just displayed in the background while I'm delirious and can't remember anything about my life, and I keep feeling like it's 'my turn' and I need to get away from this and go do something, but whenever I try to the frame peels away until a force pushes me back and it replaces itself. There's always a sudden emotion of 'Oh fuck, it's this again!' whenever the trip first starts.
There's always a sudden emotion of 'Oh fuck, it's this again!' whenever the trip first starts.
There was really only one ever experience that I had with it that differed from this pattern, and it was the time I smoked it three times in one sitting. The first trip was just that kind of trip, but the second one was totally different. I stayed very much in reality's 'frame', with nothing replacing it, but everything started spinning very rapidly and entities started entering my bedroom, and it felt very dissociative. The third hit was like this again, but while the second was still a little shocking, the third one was actually quite sexual and very much like a serotonergic psychedelic for me. I was certainly intrigued, but I hadn't really smoked salvia again in a while. The idea of having to go through the first kind of trip again to get to the others was kind of off-putting.

I had however smoked salvia on 2C-I once while coming off of ketamine, and that was actually a very nice experience with some beautiful visuals, though the salvia effect I got from it was not very strong. This time I was determined to give it a better shot, and I'd never tried it on LSD before, but since I did love it so much I thought it might enhance the salvia nicely. I smoked one decent-sized bowl of it in a couple of hits, and then just waited. Suddenly my vision was replaced by the frame again, but this time it was different, and colored with the palette an LSD hallucination would be. I didn't actually get the feeling of being stuck or needing to move, but instead I just felt free.... Rather than the frame attempting to pull back and then failing, *more* frames were being stacked on top of it, and together they were building a spiral that extended out in front of me. For a second this caught me by surprise and I hesitated, and the frames stopped being added, but then I realized it and it was so simple.... All I had to do was let go. So I did, and the frames continued being added.... The feeling it gave me was orgasmic, and as the spiral continued to build, I felt myself slipping into oblivion.

Suddenly, there was no 'I' left in the experience. All that remained was a towering structure floating in an infinite void. This structure was comprised of neon blue girls all reaching up and grabbing one another by the leg while twisting so that together they created one half of a helix design. The camera angle that was being fed through this field of perception was one of following the spiral, and I can't remember if it was up or down, but it might have been both at the same time as this sort of thing has happened for me on salvia before while watching things zip and unzip simultaneously.... There may have been more to this, but it's very hard to remember now. All I know is that this continued until suddenly the camera zoomed in to one small part of this design again, and suddenly it was a frame being pulled away to reveal 'normal' (LSD-enhanced) reality again, and I suddenly came back into myself and realized what the hell just happened. I immediately grabbed the pipe and loaded a second bowl of the salvia extract, and took it in a couple more hits.

This time, the difference between the first and second hit of salvia for me again kicked in. I again did not leave this frame, but instead was put in a much more dissociative-feeling state. I was given a second point of view outside of the first-person one that sees through my eyes, and this third-person camera angle was actually pointing in at my body while quickly rotating around the circumference of a vast space that I perceived my own awareness to be inhabiting, and everything in my perception around it was spinning very intensely as well. I immediately and without question knew that this must be what it feels like when you are on the verge of death and your reality is just coming unglued around you. In my previous dose I had had to let go of the fear of not knowing whether or not I was still alive, but this was different; the message that I got from this trip was that if I pushed this any further I would actually have to experience my own death *knowing* I'm dying, an experience which sounded much more intense. This dose was just allowing me to ride along the edge of it so that I could see what I was getting myself into. Before too long, I snapped back into my regular body again and was just tripping very, very hard on the LSD, with a much more satisfied feeling with my experience than I had had before the salvia. I felt extremely euphoric in both mind and body.

For hours after that I continued to lie in bed in the dark smoking weed and that smoking blend, and just listening to music and thinking about life. For a while I was watching some sexy Bollywood music videos just because they were so trippy and stimulating. The animal nature feeling that LSD always gives me definitely plays off that as well. A big part of the way that this trip affected me, and that I was thinking about in that time, was that my last big trip that I wrote about had helped me feel more psychologically aligned, but I still had some physical insecurities and issues to deal with about my transsexuality. For a long time I had been thinking that if I could ever have an out-of-body experience it would probably be therapeutic to me in this way, and not just because of that aspect of it but also because of how those kinds of experiences relate to my sexuality, but I had never been able to completely let go into one like that on a hallucinogen before, and definitely never on salvia. This trip actually did validate a lot of those feelings I was having, and I found it to be a major stress release in that way. I honestly never would have thought that I would have such a personally healing experience from salvia
I honestly never would have thought that I would have such a personally healing experience from salvia
, but this experience really did make me gain a lot more respect for it. It was actually one of my most euphoric and therapeutic experiences ever.

I simply reflected on all of this and thought about where my life was going at the time, and how two of my close friends were moving all the way across the country in a couple of days. I was going to meet them in the morning, so eventually when day came I got out of bed and showered and tried to normalize, other than smoking more weed, and just watched Netflix and listened to music and thought about the night. I took some Librium to kill the end of the trip after a while and then when the time came I headed out to meet them and a mutual friend and we enjoyed a good walk through the park and some joints as a send off, and I talked to them about my trip. After that I pretty much went home and then just crashed, and that was that.

This whole trip was very refreshing, but I feel that what it did for me the most was set up the next trip I had. I feel like getting to that out-of-body point on the salvia really helped me to push to new heights with the LSD as well, because I feel like the reverse tolerance even works in the sense that once I reach a state on LSD with the assistance of salvia or some other hallucinogen, I can somewhat reach that state again on LSD alone.... Anyway, I won't go too much into that for now.

The last thing I'll say is that this trip really reminded me how much I like high doses of LSD!

Exp Year: 2014ExpID: 103246
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: 23 
Published: Dec 20, 2016Views: 2,413
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Salvia divinorum (44), LSD (2) : Alone (16), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Entities / Beings (37), Sex Discussion (14), Combinations (3)

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