DOSE:	1 hit	smoked	DMT	(plant material)
	1 hit	smoked	Leonotis leonurus	(dried)

Previous experience- Alcohol, caffeine, one hit of marijuana that left me slightly giggly.

Backstory- I had heard of DMT online and became interested because of its perceived safety, the fast trip, and how unique and intense the experience is. I wanted to do it because I was curious and it sounded relatively low risk. I talked about it with a friend of mine who just so happened to know a guy. What he acquired is a dark colored somewhat oily looking plant material that is supposed to be lions tail (an herb) with an unknown amount of DMT applied to it. My friend and his girlfriend had both already tried it and that combined with what I know about DMTs relative safety made me feel comfortable enough to try it without knowing the dosage.

My friend didn't want to travel with a pipe so he came over and made one out of a pop can. He sprinkled a pinch of the material on it and I being new to this only burned about half it in one hit.

Experience - I was anxious about doing this and tried just to do it without thinking about it too much... take the plunge. As soon as I had it in my lungs I handed the 'pipe' to my friend and held it in maybe 15-20 seconds. I remember beginning to exhale.

I was sitting on the floor and my friend says I tried to get comfortable, then went and looked at a binder on my floor then went and sat in my chair (I remember none of this only returning to reality in my chair).

The exact sequence of events is difficult to remember and I don't remember the beginning. I found myself with no physical form in darkness I felt like I was going somewhere, moving forward. I didn't remember who or what I was or what was happening. I didn't remember ANYTHING at this point. I was acutely aware of my own consciousness and the fact that I didn't remember anything. I felt like a new soul. (I'm an atheist so this is just to give you the idea)

Have you ever thought about the fact that you're an independent consciousness and have free will; basically that you're alive? When I get that feeling it sends a shiver down my spine and freaks me out a bit but passes as soon as it comes. At this point in the trip I have that feeling but it doesn't pass, it's constant it's all there is.

At some point I come to essentially a river made up of objects. I am aware that they are object but they're all flattened like sheets of paper and squashed together vertically forming this moving mass. Parts of the objects sometimes pop out of their tops in 3D (hands/fingers) only to go back in to the 2D object. I am part of this river and am being pulled forward slowly but uncontrollably. I sense that there is another conscious entity in the river with me. The river begins to take more the form of a wall and I sense the entity on the other side. I want to get out but I don't know what's on the other side and what the entities intentions are.

The wall begins to break down into reality (all the objects I'm seeing made up the wall). I still have no clue what is happening to me. The first object that begins to take a recognizable form is my friends face although I don't recognize him. He is smiling and I found that reassuring. As his face fully forms I realize who he is and that's when all my memories come flooding back and I realize what is happening. As my vision continues to be restored instead of 2D sheets with 3D bits poking out the objects are becoming more 3D with 2D tearing at them like a smudge on an oil painting. The smudges are dancing like someone keeps smudging them over and over many times per second. The last visual artifact is a smudge tearing upward on my friends face.

Meanwhile as my vision is restoring I feel this nearly uncontrollable urge. Basically I felt like I needed to go forward (get out?), what I did though (when I relented to the urge a couple times) was to bend at the waist throwing my legs up and torso forward. (I was reclining in a chair) I tried to vocalize that I needed to do (something) but couldn't figure out how to explain it. I laughed because I knew how ridiculous it was that I felt this urge.

After effects- I decided I wanted to go outside after the visuals subsided and was somewhat off balance. I felt like I was controlling an avatar and there was a second lag from my inputs to my reaction. This made me feel like I was somewhat in the 3rd person. This passed quickly though.

Summary- Imagine your brain is a computer and your consciousness is the CPU. It was like having all the cords ripped out at once and having them slowly put back in. My inputs (senses) and my hard drive (memory) were gone. As they are plugged back in my brain had to figure out how to interpret them.

I was anxious before starting and my experience was dominated by anxiety... I wanted out. It wasn't a bad trip but it wasn't pleasant either. It was however incredibly interesting.

Thoughts for the future- I would like to try a smaller dosage and see what happens. Maintaining my memory of what is going on would help a lot to make the experience more pleasant. I wish I had video recorded the experience for the purposes of correlating my memories with my physical actions. I will do this outside next time. My ideal location I can imagine would be to ski off the runs into the trees, take my skis off and flop on my back in the snow. Such a serene location would surely make for a good trip. I have never EVER forgot about actions taken while drunk so I am somewhat disturbed that I was moving around and have no memory of it while on DMT. A sitter is definitely recommended.

Exp Year: 2012	ExpID: 98620
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 30
Published: Oct 27, 2020	Views: 1,160
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Leonotis leonurus (119), DMT (18) : Difficult Experiences (5), First Times (2), Small Group (2-9) (17)