Citation: Nagrom. "The Journey to Complete Euphoria: An Experience with MDMA, Mushrooms, Cannabis, LSD & Alcohol (exp92325)". Erowid.org. Jan 5, 2013. erowid.org/exp/92325
Pre-Experience: MDMA/Ecstasy 3 times. LSD 2 times. Alchohol, drunk like 5 times (I don't really enjoy it very much), weed smoked quite a bit, but recently quit for a month or two.
Setting: This whole experience happened at a rave at a camp site, which lasted at total of 4 days (music was on for 3).
Day 1 (no music yet)
My friend had asked me to go to this rave festival with him. I was a little skeptical about it being my first rave ever. So I thought on it and decided to go with him.
The night we arrived it was a little sketchy at first but funny in the same sense. I was greeted by my 'Mom and Dad', my 'mom' with a big hug as soon we pulled into the camp site and she blasted 'I'm your mom for the weekend and Mic is your dad!' Mom was very drunk by this point (I was under-age and I needed somebody over 18 to ensure I'd be okay) and she soon says, I can do drugs but I just have to be safe about it (water, rest, food etc). She guided my friend to his parking spot for the weekend which was hilarious, she was yelling and bossing C (my friend) to basically have the perfect park job!
Then Mic ('dad') came to the site of my passenger door where I was sitting. He shook my hand for like 10-20 seconds, which seemed like a very long handshake. He had been trying to intimidate me for fun I believe. I was a little sketched out but in the end he was one of the nicest people I've ever met.
That night I met everybody. I'm a rather shy person so I didn't say much to them. My friend and I tried to set up the tent ASAP because night was starting to fall and I needed a place to sleep. After struggling and failing for about an hour, night finally fell and we decided to just give up and that I would sleep in the van for the night.
I just marinated at the epic camp site for the rest of the night. The campers had set up basically the greatest decorations in all of the festival. So colorful and beautiful and just down right perfect!
Chilling on the lawn chairs with a bunch of my fellow campers who I soon became acquainted with. They seemed like the chillest down to earth people I'd ever met. My friend soon went to go to bed in the van while I stayed out and talked with my friends. My new friend R, packed a hookah and told me to start smoking, so I did. Later we eventually put hash into the bowl and it was great!
I was sitting beside this girl (who goes by the name of Dragon) who asked her, I think what was her boyfriend, 'is your world looking straight and narrow?' he replies with 'no'. Dragon replies with 'not a good answer'. So she pulls out this white powder with a little spoon like thing and takes out a little powder on it and holds it out for her BF to snort. At this point I was like 'wtf is going on here?!' in my head. Somebody soon asks what was it and she replies 'ketamine'. I'd never even heard of it before so I asked asked and it sounded intense.
One of the DJs had been camping with us (I didn't realize til he was on stage) and he was asking for drugs from anybody. Dragon pulls out the ketamine and the DJ asks if he can have some. She pulls out a hit for him and he smells it like a flower. He soon replies still snorting with his nose 'What was that by the way?' I thought that it was crazy and hardcore that he didn't even know what he had done til after. I soon went to bed after.
Day 2 (Music festival starting up)
First thing in the morning my friend and I finally set up the tent. I had brought two hits of acid and planned on doing one of them later in the day and my friend C would do one as well. We went to where they were setting up stages and just sat in the shade for a long time. My friend was trying to make me take my acid early (it was 2PM) and I wanted to do it at about 5 or 6 so I would be able to be awake all night no problem. After arguing for about 30 - 60 minutes about when to take it I told him I took it at about 2:30 (I didn't take it yet). He said he would take it an hour and a half after I did. We walked back to camp, I was pretending to be feeling it a little. Then eventually headed back to the music.
On the way to the music we smoked a bowl of weed and that's when I snuck the LSD into my mouth (about 3:30 pm? I had no track of time this whole thing so I'm guessing). He then took his about 30 minutes later. We walked down to the little pond thing and crossed the bridge.
We were reunited with some of our fellow campers and a bunch of others. I told them I was on acid and they were all like nice, we have to get some for ourselves too. This is where I started to trip balls.
I had packed about 2 more bowls and passed it around. I felt a shift in atmosphere but I couldn't put my finger on what exactly was changing. Eventually we left the people I didn't really know and it was the campers and I. We moved closer to the music and some went back to camp to look for LSD.
They all came back saying they took their acid and we just marinated on the grass by the main stage, staring at things, intrigued with how everything looked more beautiful and how everything had been starting to melt.
It was eventually just a girl and I together somehow and we just lay by each other, discussing everything we see and what's happening in each others minds. This seemed to be one of the most epic things and I felt really connected to this girl. We laid and stared at trees. Things had seemed to be blooming. Trees would grow outwards and then blossom with flowers on the tips, and then those flowers would slowly blossom towards me!
We eventually went and sat on the the other side of the pond thing where we were pretty much secluded from everybody but could still see everything. We still lay and sit there chatting about the usual.
Soon later, my friend K, had run up to us with a water gun and two kids about 7 years old who both had water guns. They started chasing us and shooting us with water guns. This was a little irritating considering I was not in the mind set to deal with kids. But it took a quick turn around. It soon felt like I was a kid again, it was exactly like playing tag when I was in elementary school! Being chased around by the 3 people was one of the most coolest experiences to happen at the festival.
P (the girl I felt connected with), C, and I started to book it back to the campsite which had to be about 3 or 4 football fields away. The kids were still chasing us!! And they managed to keep up some how. I was outstanded, thrilled and a little scared too. These kids were on a mission and it was to get us wet!
The kids caught up to us and finally
used up all their water after about an hour! It was a terrific accomplishment finally being able to sit and just enjoy.
By now I was just starting to peak and I had been tripping out so hard! I sat by my new friend R, who was giving me advice on how to take an acid trip. While he was explaining I remember just looking up at the trees, and things changed color and texture for a brief about 5 seconds. In this little while I had forgotten who I was. R is one of the smartest people I know and have met! He has the best
advice anybody has ever given me. It's unbelievable!
I had experienced a bad trip before, and I told him I experienced an 'ego death' which he later told me was 'Ego Freedom'. He was saying stuff like, if you start to have a bad trip just remember, that its like sitting in a canoe going down a river. All you need to do is tell yourself that and you'll be fine. What ever you see going down that river will eventually be behind you and don't let one bad idea spiral into a nightmare. He also said that LSD is a big head game with yourself, sure you can be with other friends but when it comes down to it, its just you, within your mind! I was so stoked on how smart R was and how great of a friend I made him this festival!
He eventually went to the stage where I just laid on the blanket outside on our site and just tripped out for awhile. Trees and other nature were still blooming and blossoming before my eyes. As well the world had began to feel like I was a cartoon living in a cartoon world. Nothing looked, or seemed real in the slightest. My reality was shattered. Later heading back to the music where I met up with P again. Night had fallen I believe. It's hard to remember everything - I was tripping balls. Then I seemed to lose everybody but P, so we were together the entire night.
We started to dance and I was loving it. She soon says she doesn't want to dance so I said we can go for a walk and chill. The both of us walked and went on an adventure on a random path.
I held her hand on the way there. She looks at me and says 'what're you doing?' (Something like that, I'm unsure.) I apologize instantly and realize she doesn't want anything. While walking she eventually grabs my hand about 10 minutes later. I was surprised and didn't know what to think.
Ends up we walked around the whole camp site and ended back up at the main desk/pond. We found a really nice spot to lay down and look at the stars and the ravers in the distance. She tells me how it's weird, she said she's usually one of the ravers just going to the music.
P and I still relaxing on the grass. Enjoying the music and the comfort of each other, gazing into the stars. We realize dark clouds are slowly drifting on top of us. I suggest that a storm may be coming possibly.
Everything had become very calm, cool and still. It was the calm before the storm. The storm seemed like a hurricane on the prairies! I've never seen so much rain fall in my life. P and I decided to go sit under a tree thinking we could wait out the storm, but it just got worse and worse. The storm was raining through all the trees and we were getting soaked!
We decided to go up the stairs by the main office where it was dry. While on the way up to the stairs we found L, a friend/camper! He had done acid for his first time and was also very drunk, he was hysterical! Upon walking up the stairs, which had literally looked like a water fall now, flowing like niagra falls.
At the top, soaked. L says 'so is the party over' I couldn't hold back but to laugh! He was standing in the rain, in a puddle, under a gutter!! He could not have gotten anymore wet, he was using the gutter as if it were a shower and was dancing in the puddle.
The storm had eventually passed and we went to go check the aftermath of the storm. The main stage had been demolished. I was super bummed! It was such a dope stage! We eventually went back to the spot where we had been sitting. And there was an enormous tree branch that had fallen as well as many other small ones! Just about 2 meters away, that is crazy!
P and I go to sit on the big stair by the pond and star gaze again. We see a star that looks significantly different from all the rest. Both of us begin talking, suggesting that its a UFO, P starts to cry out of joy and confusion and amazement. I feel incredibly connected to her. We were both in the same mind set, thinking we were seeing one of the wonders of the world. After about an hour or 2 of watching this star. We finally come to the realization that its a planet and it looks so different because its reflecting the sun!
Feeling kind of tired, I tell P and she says she has MDMA we could have. I thought that it was a great idea so we headed back to camp. The stage was working now, but there was no visuals at the time. We grab a bunch of MDMA. 3 of us snort some of it (my first time snorting it). K also snorted some (friend/camper). We had also grabbed some alcohol to drink.
Finally arriving at the main stage, about an hour or two from sunrise, we begin to dance. I see a lot of familiar faces on the dance floor. Such as R! He had a 7 foot stick with an inflatable heart at the top of it. This looked so fucking epic and awesome! I loved it.
I had entered a trance where there was no way I could stop dancing! Soon doing more MDMA. My memory is a little foggy after this. But I remember I danced till sunrise.
4 others and I headed back to camp to grab a blanket and go to the pond to watch the sun rise. Quickly coming to the realization that we are all tired and want to sleep. We went back to home (camp) and slept.
Not too much happened during the day. I talked with everybody about last evening. There was now an awkwardness between P and I for some unknown reason which remained the rest of the festival.
Also I took R's heart he had on his stick and held it to me, later suggesting that it would be cool to tape it to my chest! Which we instantly did, I felt like I belonged there now. The heart symbolizing connection between everyone which is how I felt the festival was!
That day I talked about shrooms to everyone and was unsure if I should try them as I had not done the before. I asked R for advice and he said I should try them. So I went and got 1 gram of Chocolate covered mushrooms.
By this point I was shit-faced! Shortly after, I ate the mush. It put the entire thing in my mouth. It was way too much to handle in one bite, but I managed to chew it down anyway. It was a thick dry milk chocolate and you could taste the mushrooms very slightly, it was although it was eating chocolate with nuts in it.
We headed to the dance floor. I was feeling a slight shift in my reality. Once again, I couldn't put my finger on what it was! We walked as a big group down. I was walking beside R. I was chatting with him saying how he's so smart and gives the best advice! I asked if I could call him my shaman, as that is how I felt about him, anything I wondered or needed to know, he knew! Even when I didn't ask. He replied with yes and I was super stoked!
On arrival I drink a bit of my alcohol that I brought with me to the dance. I was definitely still wasted and now tripping a little bit from shrooms. After losing almost everybody except C I was bummed out and decided to sit by the pond. I felt like passing out; I was not having a good time.
I pretty much sat around for an hour or two alone until the alchohol wore off so I actually felt amazing after! Colors simply looked out of this world. It was like I had been color blind and I was seeing colors for the first time ever, colors were simply beautiful! I also has a huge body stone, which felt a bit like MDMA but my body felt more numb. I was still once again looking for others! I could not find ANYBODY! I did not know what to do and I was panicking a bit. But soon came to the realization that I can always meet new friends and just enjoy life! They had also redone the stage and it was as good as new! The stage once again looked phenomenal!
This concept was a bit difficult for me usually as I am a shy person, but when I was on mushrooms, drunk, and high from weed. It came as though it was a natural gift I soon possessed. I went to the very front of the speakers and started to dance. I had practiced shuffling before, but once again! It just came naturally now.
I was having the best time of my life! I had become the music. I felt as though everybody was my family and that we were all at harmony! I danced for a couple hours till I finally found some people I knew from camp.
I had not had water the whole time and I was soaking wet with sweat! I saw R and one of the first words that came out of my mouth was, water! He reacted as fast as he could to get my water. I was amazed at this simple but yet amazing gesture! I soon told him what was happening and he said we should go sit down and relax as I had been over heating. We had very intellectual conversations. He was telling me how he used to have a drug problem and how he is as a person.
He said he's terrific at helping others out with their problems but when it comes to his own, sometimes he struggles deeply. I was shocked as he was one of the smartest and nicest people I've ever met. He told me that J had been his shaman, like he was to me (a girl who we were camping with). He was trying to say I understand what you're going through and I'm there for you bro. R eventually says that kids usually fuck up with drugs, but I can handle it really well and that he wants to go into big brothers big sisters. I felt incredible for him and I encouraged him to do it! Even I wish I could have him for a big bro. He wants to show kids that fuck up with drugs that you don't need to take 9 pills to have a good time or 12 grams of shrooms. It just takes a little.
After out heart to heart talk, he had the brilliant idea that we should put the inflatable heart on my back and not my chest because it gets in the way of dancing , especially dancing with girls.
Soon after doing so I started dancing again. I asked him for tips on trying to find a girl there as I couldn't find one I was attracted to! Once again, it came as no surprise, he gave the greatest advice ever!
R told me to just go find a spot where I was comfortable, close my eyes and just let the music do its part, just lose myself within the music. And when I open my eyes, I'd lock eyes with a girl and everything would be great.
Oddly enough, I did exactly as he said, and guess what!? I locked eyes with a girl and we soon began dancing with each other! She was one of the cutest girls at the whole thing, a little raver girl wearing a mini skirt, furry boots, bikini top, and a cat hat that looked really sexy! I was shocked at how good of advice R gives, like, it's insane!
I was feeling euphoric for probably one of the first times ever. It felt like absolutely everybody was my best friend and that there was no ice to break. This was a little odd to me because I'm a shy timid person around new people, especially adults. It was the greatest feeling I've ever felt! I cannot even explain how terrific this felt. Just feeling the love of everybody, at complete unity and peace with one another as human beings! I'd smile at somebody, they'd smile back. I was shuffling and almost instantly I found other shufflers around me, shuffling with me! It was incredible and unreal. I almost could not believe this was happening. I was shuffling in sync with others and we would take turns, I truly discovered what it was like to lose your ego at this point. I didn't care what anybody looked like but only the connection we shared. It legitimately felt like everybody was at one huge family at a reunion!
After dancing the night away, most of the crowd had disappeared into the fog of the night. I told J (the girl I had been dancing with) that I was tired. She instantly concurred with me and I asked if we should head back. We started to head back and I asked what she did tonight. She had done acid and smoked weed which was cool and would have been a blast as well.
We got to my tent where we went in to the tent and there was no way we were going to sleep. After dancing with her all night, I felt connect and incredibly attracted to her, there was no holding back. I soon found us having sex! The sex was incredible. It's inevitable to explain how great everything was. I didn't have a single worry in the world and I could not be happier!
Day 4 (final day of music)
Later that morning I saw J leave but I was still asleep. I woke up later that morning thinking to myself I'd never see her again and I was kind of bummed as she was from the same city I was and I thought we could have been friends.
I had bought more shrooms for the night today and I still had an entire vial of MDMA. Not too much happened during the day so I'm going to skip to night.
That night I took the mushrooms and took about an eighth of the MDMA which isn't a lot but it seemed to do wonders! I'd like to start off by saying I have never been higher in my life.
I took the mushrooms and right after parachuted the MDMA. I didn't really know what to expect as this was the first time I had ever 'hippie flipped'. I started to feel a shift in reality as usual.
I had arrived to the dance floor and everything began to look amazing. The lights looked mesmerizing. The bass from the music became my heartbeat. My body was feeling numb but at peace. I had the giggles like I want a young baby and I felt butterfly like feelings inside my stomach which in turn made me smile and I couldn't stop! Things started to look like they were from a 3D pop out book. I remember I walked by this tree a ton and it just looked more and more different every time. It just seemed to POP out at me! This had been the greatest I have felt in my entire life! I don't remember a point in the night where I was not smiling. I was the happiest person in the world!
Dancing for an hour or so. I began to wonder if I would see J again that night. I asked R what I should do and he said something like 'Don't fuck a different chick man, make her your temple'. As he had never given me bad advice, I had no choice but to listen! He had also told me to go up behind her and smack her ass and say 'damn I had a good time last night' and walk away. It would've been hilarious to do that, but it was too vulgar for me.
After a quick water break with R, my eyes finally spotted J on the other site of the rave. The colors still looking magnificent and everything seeming surreal, I strutted my way across to J not knowing what to expect. I came up behind her and was greeted instantly with a huge grin, with a big bear hug. I was stoked that things were going really well!
My 'parents' had soon come to us and they stole J from me like a bunch of ninjas. They only took her a couple meters away, but I could hear what they were saying. They told her they were my parents and she had the most confused look on her face I've ever seen! She was absolutely clueless. While D (a guy from another camp, who had tried acid for the first time) had given me an enormous hug and said 'man, I fucking love you!' This was fucking great! Euphoria is really indescribable but this is one of the closest examples that had happened there! That night he had been going up to everybody he knew and did the exact same thing to them, he had even tried to kiss 'dad'! Anyways. I was reunited with J after having a big group photo, which seemed like a family portrait! I haltingly explained that they weren't my parents and that they were just saying that because they assumed responsibility over me. She kind of understood but I re-explained it to her later.
We continued to dance like our lives depended on it. I literally had people from my camp running up to me to give me water and gum. I loved how they were so concerned for me, it made me feel like the greatest person in the world.
A little while after, J asks me if I want to smoke a bowl. I yelled 'sure!' On the way out of the dance area, I saw R, and I have him an epic high five. It was so epic it seemed like it had created a shock wave. We went to the big open field where lazers and trippy images on the screens were. We smoked and I offered J and her friend some MDMA because I had more than plenty. Her friend said no because she had to drive tomorrow. I loaded the MDMA onto a Kleenex for J. We had still been passing the pipe around smoking like chimneys. I was incredibly high. The music was incredibly different and sounded like it was the best thing my ears have ever listened to. As well as colours just looked a lot more vibrant and incredible! She took the MDMA and said 'thanks for the MDMA'. We then sat there for about 20 minutes. During this time, we had begun cuddling in the middle of the field, soon leading to us kissing, and then making out. Soon enough we were going all out. I had even started to touch in inappropriate places, she then said something which I'm unclear of but all I know is she wanted me to stop.
We soon went back to the music and dancing again. Still feeling incredibly euphoric and all the effects as before, if not even stronger than before. I felt really connected to this girl, as if she was my girlfriend. After dancing for about 30 minutes or so. We went back to sit down.
Sitting for a little bit I turned to J as we were cuddling and said 'I'm tired' because I started to get tired and my legs were KILLING me as I had been dancing for hours and hours every day. She replied saying 'me too'. I then raised the question 'do you want to head back?' and she said 'sure'. It was still dark out and I'm thinking this was about 4 am in the morning.
We arrived at my tent which was about a ten minute walk and both went in comfortably. This is the latest I had arrived to my tent all weekend and I was kind of excited to go to sleep early. Little did I know, I soon found us having sex. It was the best sex I have ever had in my life. I could definitely still feel the effects of the drugs. I could literally feel the bass from my tent, which gives you an idea of how loud the music really was. Touching felt AMAZING and sex, well, I can't begin to explain how great it felt!! It was ten times better than usual! After going at it for awhile and getting comfortable. I realized that it is very difficult to orgasm while on ecstasy/mushrooms, I knew this because I had noticed the sun was coming up and the music turned off (music turns off at 6 am) and we were still having sex, while she finally began to orgasm around this time. We had eventually stopped, not because of one another having an orgasm, but instead because we were really sweaty and exhausted! After soon falling asleep together too tired to put clothes back on.
That morning I made sure I had her number and I had walked her back to her campsite and gave her a good bye hug and kiss.
All in all, this weekend was a true, spiritual experience.
I have had an epiphany that life is too short to be shy and timid. I now have conversations with strangers everyday, without any awkward pauses or anything! It's great and I think I may have lost my ego this entire weekend and it has yet to return.
J and I are still talking everyday and everything is going super well.
This was my first rave, and definitely is not my last!
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