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A Beautiful Breakup
LSD
Citation:   emiry. "A Beautiful Breakup: An Experience with LSD (exp83612)". Erowid.org. Jan 16, 2020. erowid.org/exp/83612

 
DOSE:
1 hit oral LSD (blotter / tab)
    repeated smoked Tobacco - Cigarettes  
BODY WEIGHT: 112 lb
A Beautiful Breakup on Acid

My boyfriend and I have tripped on acid many times together but my most memorable, most definitive experience was the night we broke up.

A different girl had been getting in between us for a while, and trying to mend the relationship, we tried to spend a good amount of time together. One day, we felt like tripping, and so we began by taking a tab each. Within the hour, I was feeling that way I always feel when the lucy first hits me, as if I am filled with bubbles or covered in soap. This soapy feeling is always the first thing I notice and it remains throughout the trip.
This soapy feeling is always the first thing I notice and it remains throughout the trip.
Soon enough, my boyfriend and were having sex as usual, and it was mind-blowing and never ending. Every once in a while I would suck his dick and giving a blowjob on lucy is indescribable. His dick feels as though it is unendingly hard and I feel like I give the best head in the world. His moaning creates an entrancing atmosphere where I get utterly lost in his cock and do everything perfectly and never want to stop.

After fucking for what seems like hours, we took a bubble bath around 11pm. We used blueberry scented, blue colored bubbles and lit candles and sat in the tub smoking cigarettes, being euphoric and lovey dovey. It seemed as if everything was perfect and everything we do, no matter how silly, is magical.

After our bath, we went back into his bedroom and just talked about everything and nothing and anything and soon enough, the conversation turned to the girl who had been trying desperately to steal my boyfriend. Suddenly my mood turned from incredibly content to sad and broken. I felt like everything my boyfriend and I had been through for the last 2 years was a lie, and this whole time I had been 'the other girl'. My boyfriend desperately tried to convince me that lucy was making me feel this way and that wasnt the case. I wouldn't have it. Convinced that I could no longer live this lie, I insisted we break up. I felt strong as well as victimized and I felt this was my only option. He tried to make me change my mind endlessly but I continued to explain that even though he was my entire world and this would be the hardest thing to wake up to the next morning, it was what was right.

I cried and cried and went outside alone for a cigarette to calm down. Sitting on his porch listening to Kate Bush on my ipod, I felt incredibly alone and solitary. The sky looked like it was on an early technicolor tv set. Fuzzy and dark purple and vast, I felt as if I was floating away from the person who had been my other half for so long. I felt as if I was leaving my familiar world and entering a foreign, uninhabited, quiet, snowy world. I was calm, yet solemn and incredibly nostalgic for 'what I had lost' and 'what was to come'. The world seemed empty and unreal and even though it was probably about 20 degrees outside, I sat there warmly in my seat, thinking how I was going to be alone forever, and I was now my own only friend.

After going through about a half a pack of cigarettes, I went back inside and my boyfriend and I felt strange, like there was suddenly a new essence to our existence. We could no longer be in love, but now we were 'friends'.

[Erowid Note: Driving while intoxicated, tripping, or extremely sleep deprived is dangerous and irresponsible because it endangers other people. Don't do it!]
I asked him to drive me home and the car ride back was probably the most beautiful experience I can remember ever going through. We seemed to be the only car on the road and we didnt turn on any music because we felt like this would be our last time 'being together' and we wanted to cherish it. We talked endlessly about how purely magical our time together had been and how thankful we were to be lucky enough to get to have 2 years of our lives be so beautiful. We were still tripping quite pretty hard and just as I realized that my boyfriend was driving really well, a car came out of nowhere, and faced us head on in our lane. Immediately my boyfriend swerved out of the way and I couldn't believe how well he did. He called it a miracle as we sat in the car I thought about how perfect it would have been to crash and die right then.

Acid makes me very nostalgic and appreciative of life and can be very sobering.
Acid makes me very nostalgic and appreciative of life and can be very sobering.
I felt as though sitting in that car at 3am on a quiet snowy night, as he and I confessed how much we love each other and how hard the rest of our lives would be without one another and valuing how incredibly beautiful a first love is and crying and having this unspeakable bond between us, I felt like I was ready to die. I felt like the most meaningful experience in my life was happening and to die in it would make it invaluable.

When we got to my house, he parked and we spent about an hour sitting in the car talking about how much we cherished each other as if we were running out of time. Before I left, we had what seemed like it would be our last kiss ever and I told him that I would never forget him.

For some reason, it seemed to me that I was never in my life going to see him again, and I had these intense emotions of sadness, solemnness, loneliness, yet appreciation of how beautiful everything is.

I got home, looked at my incredibly plated eyes in the mirror and as if to say goodbye to myself as I was that day, I stared in the mirror and said goodbye to myself, turned off the lights, got in to bed and cried for hours.

In the next few day, I realized that the acid had created an incredibly beautiful day and had created a bond between us unlike anything we had already shared. We both acknowledged it and have since gotten back together and the trip truely did connect us and make us stronger and it created an emotional bond that I think can never die. It's the truth, I think my most meaningful experience on this earth was tripping on acid and I'm thankful for what it did.

LSD is a beautiful thing.

Exp Year: 2008ExpID: 83612
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: Jan 16, 2020Views: 790
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LSD (2) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Relationships (44), Sex Discussion (14), General (1)

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Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the authors who submit them. Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.


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