St. John's Wort
Citation: Rivendale286. "An Astoundingly Improved Life: An Experience with St. John's Wort (exp61025)". Erowid.org. Feb 28, 2008. erowid.org/exp/61025
This report focuses on how St. John's has helped my depression an unbelieveable amount, but if you don't really suffer from depression St. John's is a great calming drug just for the experience as well. I occasionaly will given my roomate one, and he always mentions that he notices that he feels really good, extra-calm, and happy... I've taken two at a time for fun, and there's an especially nice happiness and relaxing sensation (I have not tried more than 2 at once).
After reading many online reports about St. John's, I kept contemplating back and forth about whether to try it or not... One day I had an issue come up that I knew would send me into a depression, so I knew it was time to give it a shot. I bought a bottle of 300mg capsules from a local grocery store and just followed the directions on the bottle (which were to take one tablet 3 times daily). So I started with that and have been taking it faithfully (except for once) for about 4 months now.
For as long as I can remember I've always felt isolated from the world and incredibly hesitant about things like talking to people I don't know or being in new situations. With St. John's I feel much more at ease and less worried about most everything (what I imagine a 'normal' person feels like). Example: Before if I'd said something weird to someone (not mean or cruel, just something I looked back at and thought was weird), I would get mad and stay mad at myself for a long time for being 'not normal' and be afraid of what they thought of me. St. John's has calmed me down significantly and allowed me to finally actually relax.
Looking back, I used to see everyday things as almost a hassle to have to go through and derived very little real enjoyment from them (classes, work, watch tv, etc.). Now I do most of things I've always done, but I actually enjoy doing them significantly more. I've had a noticeable difference not just in my personal feelings, but multiple people have said remarked on how I've become dramatically less worried/guarded and more friendly and talkative.
After about a month of taking it, I decided to stop for a few days and see if I could do without it (just because of the desire that I didn't want to be dependent on something). In those days I became nervous about everything and twitchy like i'd always been before (well slightly worse, probably because I actually knew more of what it was like to feel normal as I hadn't before). As I said, I used to get mad at myself for doing a simple weird thing, but unlucky for myself during these days I actually did do something pretty stupid. Instead of the old 'pissed off at myself' attitude, I felt totally and completely worthless, one of the worst days I've ever had mentally... After my failed experiment to see if I had been 'cured', I swiftly went back to the suggested regimen and will be sticking to it for the forseeable future.
After taking a capsule, I would say the effects slowly fade in within 30 mins-1 hour or so, 'peak' at 4 or so hours, and are starting to fade away by the sixth hour. The directions on what I bought say 3 tablets daily, and that's a pretty accurate timing-wise. I take one in the morning with breakfast, one at lunch, and one at dinner (and one later in the evening if I plan on staying up late)... I still feel a little depression: a slight bit some mornings before the St. John's has a chance to kick in, and random other ocassions like when i can't keep my schedule of taking it. But these times aren't that horribly bad, as I know that within just a little while of taking it those feelings will fade away.
I really can't believe how I could have suffered from depression for years and a great help was sitting next to the Tylenol in the grocery store and cost about 10 cents per capsule. There isn't a 'cure' for depression in anything or anyone, but for me this has been an amazing way to help control and dramatically improve my everyday life. If I had only have found this 4 or 5 years ago... but since I can't go back in time I'm just glad I discovered it when I did.
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