H.B. Woodrose & Dimenhydrinate
Citation: Obscuria. "Lost the Beauty: An Experience with H.B. Woodrose & Dimenhydrinate (exp37744)". Erowid.org. Jul 10, 2007. erowid.org/exp/37744
My first and last bad experience with HBW happened December 24/25th December 2002.
I was interested in taking LSD that summer after reading a lot about it. I didn't know anybody that I trusted that I could get actual LSD off but after doing a lot of research and reading about experiences I decided to try and purchase HBW seeds off the internet. I ended up getting them from the Netherlands as back then they didn't prove easy to find at a reasonable price. Now they're easily purchased. After my experience with it though I believe it really shouldn't be readily available because people tend to believe them to be mild and not as risky as taking the real thing, but I don't think that's true. My first batch came and there were six seeds if I remember right. I scraped the fuzzy stuff off and tried to crush them up in any way I could. After a long while trying to prepare them I decided just to eat them and had a great trip, the best feeling I've ever had. This isn't the story I'm telling though, I'd rather write about my bad experience.
So after the first amazing trip I found another place on the net to get the seeds. I got them off an american site this time for $15(I live in the U.K. by the way). There were a lot more this time, enough to last me a long time. My first trip was in August, and after that I had one roughly once a month. Each trip got more and more dull though. I had just started my second year of GCSEs and tripping was a nice escape from all that stress. I always knew that general well-being was essential if I was going to be tripping and that no way could I do it if I was in a bad mood or had a bad couple of days. I found doing it out of boredem just made it weird and uneventful. The worst part is not being able to sleep at all. After my trip in November I knew it was barely worth it anymore. I stayed at a friend's house and whilst they slept I was up all night sitting on a chair too numb to move. I didn't really panic so I didn't really class that as a bad trip, but after that one I don't see how I could of thought I'd ever have a good trip again.
Well here's the beginning of the real story...
It was Christmas eve and I was thinking of how I hadn't taken any HBW that month and how it'd be fun to take it on Christmas eve. There was no real logic in my thinking then. By the time I bothered to prepare them it was evening. I absolutely DETEST the taste of these seeds, there have a really bitter taste and everytime I think about the taste I feel sick. One of the actual side effect of these seeds is nausea, I always got that for the first hour or so of the trip. I didn't want it this time so I took a travel sickness tablet before taking the HBW. About half an hour after taking the tablet I ate the seeds. I bit them in half and then put each half in a bit of milkyway cake bar and ate it, then washed it down with some ribena. They still tasted sick but I managed to get all six of them down. Even though I had gained a tolerance to them I still only took six. After I got that all over and done with I basically got on with chatting on the internet and watching TV.
This trip was quite a long time ago now so I can't remember much detail. I must of got really bored, which led to me getting really negative and pissed off. I ended up laying down on my bed feeling extremely sick. It was around midnight and everybody was in bed. Everytime I did HBW I was alone and only stayed in my house and in my garden. This time felt different though, I was very aware I was alone and was getting more and more anxious as thoughts of waking up my parents and telling them I was having a bad trip came flooding into my head. I managed to control myself though and decided to ride it out alone. After a while my head started spinning and I needed to throw up. I was in a complete state. This was probably the worst part physically.
I was lying on my bed, curled up, with my head hanging over the side because I knew I was going to vomit. Everytime I closed my eyes everything spun at 100mph, but with my eyes open everything was just swirling about. Eventually I threw up next to my bed, it was absolutely horrible and smelt disgusting, but I couldn't move because I felt so dizzy. Everytime I closed my eyes I could see an army of skeletons in hell marching, and I thought there was a portal to hell in my room and that they were coming for me. That, and other terrifying thoughts just kept circulating through my mind. It felt like hours that I was lying there, but the memory of it all didn't sort out the whole warped perception of time.
It was probably around 3/4am that I managed to get up. I knew I was in a state and needed to try and get back to reality. I went to the living room and stuck on Lord of the Rings, I thought it'd help me focus on something and perhaps make me fall asleep. I think I only managed to watch it for five minutes before I wandered off. I ended up in the lounge where I curled up on the sofa to try and get comfortable and calm myself down. I vommited again, but after that time I felt a bit better. Thoughts and feelings weren't so intense anymore and I just felt spaced out and kind of melancholic. I tried to tune in to comforting thoughts about how it was Christmas and how I had a family and a home and all that stuff. It's all a bit of a blur now but I sat on that sofa for what felt like an eternity thinking about my life and how I'd messed it up with all this drug crap. That night really put a lot of things into perspective.
At around 7am I managed to fall asleep only to be woken up about 9am. There was no escaping getting up and seeing all my family being Christmas morning and all. I felt so emotionally and physically drained, no energy at all. I had to try and explain why I had left the TV on and why I had thrown up so much. Things were a lot different, I couldn't believe that just a few hours ago I was in a different dimension of my mind. I just wanted to forget all about it.
In retrospect I realised two things made the trip so bad, the first was definitely the travel sickness tablet. I had never gotten THAT nauseated before so it must of been that. The second thing was my state of mind. I *thought* I was content with life but that was a big mistake. I had unknowingly fallen back into depression and that trip confirmed that I was unstable and not fit to be taking mind altering drugs. I swore I'd NEVER do HBW again. I can't imagine anything worst that being trapped in such a hellish state of mind for that long, it's absolute torture. So this story is really a warning.
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