Citation: Upiyano. "A Sympathy of Crickets, An Ocean of Color: An Experience with H.B. Woodrose (exp36097)". Erowid.org. Jan 5, 2008. erowid.org/exp/36097
A week ago I had a really good time by grinding 8 Hawaiian Baby Woodrose Seeds, soaking in water for two days, and drinking the water. I planned to make this trip more powerful than the last, so I ground up 9 seeds and just downed them with chamomile tea at about midnight. I told my sister I what I was doing in case I needed her and went to my room.
A Symphony of Crickets:
I spent the come up just listening to music and talking on the internet; I was enjoying the trippy feelings.
After awhile I decided to put Mira Calix's Nunu set on. It is a 20 minute composition made only from the sounds of insects, it's quite amazing. While listening to the music I could make myself think I was outside listening to a symphony of insects with my fan blowing lightly over my body. It seemed very erotic to me, intensifying as the song got louder. After listening to the set twice I decided I should see where else Mira could bring me. It was interesting listening to her other compositions and I could imagine myself in strange alien worlds; for awhile I thought I was swimming through an undersea world which almost seemed like a video game. Mira Calix makes amazing trip music.
When I finished listening to the music I realized I was feeling nauseous and went outside so I could throw up if I needed (I didn't). I lay on a sleeping bag in my backyard with my eyes closed listening to a calmer symphony of crickets before heading back inside. After spending some time talking on IRC I decided to sleep and turned my music off. This is where things got fun.
An Ocean of Color:
Before long I realized I wasn't in my bedroom anymore. I was in an ocean of colors, all flowing together. I felt lost and didn't know if I would ever come back, despite constantly reminding myself I was on a drug. Eventually I opened my eyes or woke up (I'm not sure what it was).
I knew I was in my house but everything seemed strange and I was really confused. I heard my dad getting up to make coffee and debated going out to talk to him. While in my room I kept trying to grab onto solid things. I felt like I needed something concrete to hold on to because the ocean of color was too smooth and undefined. One thing that really sticks out to me is looking at my wall and seeing all the bumps and crevices as I dragged my fingers across it. Eventually I had to talk to my dad, so I left my room.
Understanding Myself and Family:
Before continuing I should let you know my parents are relatively ok with drug use. My dad was in his twenties and in Berkeley during the '60s so you can imagine what he is like.
When I went out my dad was confused at first but after I told him what I took he seemed to understand exactly how to help me. I don't remember what he said to me but it changed my mood completely. My sister must have heard us talking because she came out and talked with us for awhile. Eventually my mom came out too and we began talking about spiritual things. I realized that the ocean of color was like a pool of energy that everything flows into and out of, a will of the universe you could say. I knew that everyone and everything is connected and everything affects everything else. Chaos theory seems to be the best way to describe it. In fact, it's exactly what chaos theory is about.
As I was realizing that everyone is connected I also realized that, just like in chaos theory, patterns can emerge. Patterns are like people, animals, and objects. They create a pattern (a shape, conscious thought, whatever) out of the void and create our world. An example would be a nebula forming into a star.
I also understood that there are different kinds of people in different parts on different parts of a spectrum. An example we used was how my sister hates the bible and what it stands for. To her the bible is unneeded and she believes it is a horrible set of teachings in part because she doesn't need it. On the other had, fanatic christians do need it. It's an essential part of who they are and it's silly to get caught up worrying about what is and isn't important to them. I realized that I have to live in the now and not worry about the past and future to the point of obsession.
While it became a truly difficult experience for me I'm grateful that it happened. I really allowed me to change for the better.
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