Citation: Danielle. "Hallucinations & More Hallucinations: An Experience with Mushrooms & Cannabis (exp34958)". Erowid.org. Jul 27, 2004. erowid.org/exp/34958
It was the summer after my 11th grade year and I was going to visit my Auntís house to see my 2 guy cousins who were around my age. I had been researching shrooms and asking people about it for awhile. From the people I had asked they seemed to be really fun, no bad stories, and my cousinís friend had a shitload of shrooms, so I said, what the hell, why not give it a whirl. But I had talked to my 21 year old brother and he told me that I should probably have an emergency Xanax handy because sometimes you may get very paranoid and scared. I didnít really think anything of it because he actually had panic attacks sober so I didnít think that applied to me that much. He also told me that to be safe it would be good to only eat 1.7-2.0 grams for my first time. If maybe I had only listened, I could have been saved the day of hell that followed me!!
I arrived on a Thursday and got really drunk that night and didnít eat anything before I went to bed, only drank a lot of water. The next morning I was HUNGRY AS HELL. I told my cousin T, we need to make some god damn bacon or something. He said we couldnít eat since we were going to trip today and we need to have empty stomachs. He also said that his best friend TJ would be coming to pick us up to go to his house in just a little bit. So finally J got there and we headed across town to his house and he actually offered me mine for free because we are also friends, Iím a girl and I was the ďguestĒ is what he said. (I ended up giving him $5) He was weighing mine out and it was 3.5, he looked at T likeÖ should I give her all that? They agreed that I should take all of it because they wanted to make certain that I tripped. I really hate normal mushrooms to begin with, so eating these ďfreeze dried cornĒ tasting mushrooms wasnít making it an easier. So I crushed them up in my hand and swallowed them like a pill.
J decided to put in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. All the sudden I started getting a little light headed and happy, I told um, I think Iím starting to feel it. I started giggling and smiling. I remember one part in the movie where a hotel clerkís mouth started morphing long ways and when I saw it, it really stunned me, it was a new feeling that I had never gotten from just watching something. It was a little adrenaline rush. Then we decided to go downstairs in the basement to a cement bake out room lit with black lights to smoke a dro blunt. Thatís when the first hallucination happened. I still felt pretty sober so I didnít know what was happening but the floor looked like it was moving. Like the carpet was moving underneath my feet like a conveyer belt disappearing in the wall. I had to take a double take, like was I really seeing this? I told everyone and J was like yeah! The floors moving! I felt so stupid talking to J about it because he was the sober ďbabysitterĒ and ďthe floor is movingĒ is such a clichť shroomer remark.
Then we got out and all the sudden the second hallucination came. It looked like purple Roman numerals going down the middle of Tís jeans. It looked just as clear as day, like the Roman Vís and Iís. I said, T, is there something written on your pants? He looked at his pants and pointed to the Sean Jean writing. I said no not that, and then when I went to point at it, it disappeared. I got so confused. They were like thatís it! Sheís shrooming! I was so confused, and I felt stupid again for making that remark because I really thought it was there. We went upstairs and thatís when all the shit started. All the sudden hallucinations were getting more and more. I would look at the floral pattern on the couch and it would come out and almost come alive and the longer I stared the more that certain hallucination would morph. All the sudden I was just seeing patterns everywhere.
Then came (as I can only explain it) like a giant tick tack toe board with thousands of squares covering my entire vision, including peripheral vision, with tiny little shapes spinning inside every box. I would see the entire wall and floor just become covered in brick before my eyes. The shapes would change without me wanting them to. Then I saw the TV. Ed, Edd, and Eddy the cartoon was on and they were doing all sorts of crazy things and I was getting so confused. Was I seeing them do this? Or are they actually doing all this crazy stuff on the cartoon. (Because itís a weird show to begin with) The show was really bugging me out. That is when I started to get very confused and worried. Then AS all this was happening something else happens, I lose my hearing for a second and I see my body literally go into like slices and then go back together as Iím just sitting on the couch, almost like a deck of cards that you flip with your thumb.
I was getting more and more worried. I shake my head to make it stop and all my visuals go away for a second but then come rushing back, I look over to T sitting quietly on the couch across from me and then all my sight goes green, like I am looking through green tinted glasses plus all the hallucinations on top of that. Also I am thinking non-stop! Thoughts would just come rushing into my head! I couldnít concentrate at all. At this point, so many things are happening at once that I give up trying to explain what I am seeing to J (who keeps asking ďwhat are you seeingĒ) Because he said (later on) that I was looking into space wide eyed and worried, sighing, and shaking my head and putting my hand on my cheek. I start to get freaked out but I am trying my fucking best to keep my cool. I go sit next to T who is really quiet now and ask him if heís tripping. He says yeah, but not very convincing because it doesnít seem to be tripping NEAR as much as I am. I try to tell him very quietly, T, I am tripping, like I mean REALLY tripping. Itís a little too much. I kind of want it to stop.
Heís like damnÖhe looks concerned but you can tell heís having an individual trip himself. My heart beat starts to go up and I start to breathe very quickly. J walks in and I say, is there any thing to reduce this? He tells me yeah if you eat it will cut it in half. And then he makes me feel like if I eat something Iím copping out because he says ďYou bought the ticket, you got to take the rideĒ Then I start thinking, this really is like a scary Halloween ride and I just want to fucking get off. I really donít care at this point because I know I have low blood sugar and fainting spells if I donít eat and Iím extremely worried and bugging out hard core now. I go for some bread and I mash it up and eat it. I try to chew but my mouth is SO dry I canít even get the bread chewed. I go desperately for some water as my entire vision is being bombarded by hallucinations. LITERALLYÖEVERYTHING in my site was morphing now!!
Then all of a sudden my trip did a 10 fold! I said the food isnít making it go away J! Itís intensifying it!! What do I do to make this go away! I want this to go away now! Please J! Please! He said I donít know, I donít know! Iím sitting next to T now and this is when I look at him and his head is inflating, his arms are getting longer and waving in the air, when I pick up my glass of water I canít even feel it. It doesnít seem like itís my hand on that glass. I couldnít feel the water going down my throat, I thought I might choke. I put the water down, I say I think I need to puke. I go to the bathroom and I look myself in the mirror and my forehead is crinkled and I just look extremely worried. I go try to puke by putting my finger down my throat but itís like my gag reflex is gone! I feel like I am touching half way down my esophagus but Iím not having any reaction to it. I am EXTREMLY worried I am having the panic attack of my life!
I run back in and I try to sit down on the couch but the hallucinations wonít stop, everything I look at turns into a hallucination and I canít help it. I feel I am completely losing control of reality. The hallucinations are really scaring me. I say I really need to go get some fresh air so I bust out the front door and I just lay on the cool cement of the porch. I start shaking uncontrollably now, Iím so worried I want to cry but I donít. T and J followed me outside. At this point the hallucinations are so bad and my stomach hurts so much that I just try puking right there on the lawn, but nothing. I close my eyes and put my head on the cement, I honestly know that this is all in my head, nothing is really bad I just need to calm myself, I tell myself, STOP IT! Itís all in your head! STOP IT! But I canít, and my stomach is still hurting so bad. T sits next to me and comforts me and he talks to J and says ďLook at her dude sheís shaking what do we do?Ē J said ďIt was just a trip that started out good but just went really badĒ.
I look up at the spiked leaf bush and all the spikes would start growing and I would just try to close my eyes because the hallucinations are scaring me so badly. I honestly want to go to the hospital but I donít dare say it in worries that it will just intensify the situation even more. The closed eye visuals are just as bad, I can only compare it to that scene in Jurassic Park when the DNA is going crazy on the screen in some superhighway thing. Iím seeing numbers, letters, colors, and a shitload of patterns. Actually I remember thinking when I was on it that all the things I was seeing REALLY reminded me of the patterns you see on black light postersÖthat color and those forms. My mind is going wild. I go back into the bathroom to give it another try. I still donít feel the gag reflex but all of the sudden I feel an ďumphfĒ in my stomach so I just shove my finger down my throat and then I finally puke, there in the toilet connected to a bunch of pieces of bread is the shrooms. I say out loud ďTheeeerrrrreeeee you little fuckers areÖĒ
Immediately I feel better... I go lay down on the couch alone and now its cool because Iím coming down after a minute or two and finally in about 10 minutes Iím back to normal, and I still have one or two hallucinations, but now I am able to sit back and appreciate them. My head feels like I just broke a fever and I have a certain feeling of overcoming some major obstacle mentally and so much relief. While I was shrooming Jís little dog had pissed all over my jacket but I didnít care, I felt soooooo emotionally drained and happy that it was over.
BUT 3 weeks later I actually did have a shroom flashback; my stomach was hurting from not eating and I was drinking and then I started getting that really fast heartbeat and then BOOM the patterns come back and I canít make them go away. I donít tell anyone until the next morning, and I honestly do get anxious for no reason now and when I think about shrooms I get some of the symptoms back. So PLEASE if you are a beginner, be responsibleÖdonít take a shitload, just please be careful, because it can FUCK YOU UP!
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