Citation: Jiggy. "Trippin too Hard: An Experience with Cannabis (exp32155)". Erowid.org. Nov 15, 2005. erowid.org/exp/32155
My marijuana use started on November 24. I only remember because it was the day before Thanksgiving. This introduction to the wonderful world of weed was great. I was experiencing something completely new to me and I was loving it. The feelings that the marijuana gave me compelled me to continue using it. I only smoked when I felt comfortable doing it. It was important for me to know that it was a decision I was making, not my friends. I preferred to be in a relaxed environment, one that was laid back, and with my friends.
All of my other smoking experiences led me to have really good feelings, in other words I got really high. I would experience a general euphoria, even the most remotely funny thing could set me off laughing. I though that this was the way weed treated you. I was unaware that I could ever have a bad trip.
I had come across some feelings of paranoia or emotional discomfort while under the influence of marijuana before. I would feel like I was going to get in trouble, or an event would cause a moment of fear or depression, I even felt very self-conscious at times. Whenever I got these feelings though they were completely overcome by the intense joy that I had undergone.
However, on February 11 of the following year, these feelings took over for the first time. I had smoked a couple of bowls of regular weed out of a glass pipe. I started feeling really good, not too high, but generally relaxed. My friends were setting up a hooka to smoke outside and I was standing near them. I suddenly felt as thought the world around me was jumping up and down. I thought that I needed to lay down and chill out to get rid of it. This was no the case. After lying for a few minutes I went into a deeper high. The shaking began. Everything I could see was shaking violently. And every few seconds it would jump up into something indescribable. The closest feeling I know to it is Superman The Ride. It felt as though I was suddenly taking off at a million miles an hour. THIS WAS EXTREMELY UNPLEASANT and occurred every few seconds for two hours.
Mentally I was freaking out. I couldn’t think straight. My mind was completely unable to function. I could not get a grasp on reality, and any thought I had I could not keep for more than a moment. I felt as though I had lost all control of myself and became unsure of what would happen next. It was a feeling of great despair. The only thought that I could keep was the thought that I might die, that I might suddenly pass out and never wake up. Or if I did I would not be the same person. When I tried to reassure myself that everything would be all right the overbearing experience would return me to my state of uncertainty.
After the two hours or so I felt exhausted. I was extremely tired and my mind was in a haze. My eyes were bloodshot and I could barely function.
The second time I experienced this was on March 20. I was at a party. My girlfriend was supposed to meet up with me there, but for some reason was running late. I didn’t think she would mind if I smoke a couple bowls before she arrived. I was absolutely great for about twenty minutes. I had recently recovered from the stomach flu and had gotten high the day before. Also, the weed I smoke I had smoked on one other occasion. And when I smoked it this time I was with many other friends.
After a while I began feeling a bit tired. I sat down and that’s when all the trouble started. The room started to shake once more and I was feeling as though I was loosing all control of myself. I started to go into “warp speed” every few seconds again. And the thoughts of not coming out of the trip ok and dying had returned. I knew that I had experienced this before but was unsure that everything would be all right this time. I even felt myself slipping into an unconscious state. All thoughts in my mind would cease and my head would be clear. I would enter this trance, in which I could not move or speak or think. Then my eyes would close and I would slip out of my mind. When this happened I realized it and opened my eyes, thinking that if I let myself go I would never be able to return.
Eventually I could interact with other people, I could speak and talk with them, pausing when my mind lost control. I even was able to walk, although it was with great difficulty. It was like I was watching myself in third person. I could go where I wanted, but I was not the one in control of my body. The party atmosphere was not helping so I stumbled to my car. I had difficulty opening my door, but once I did I got in and felt a bit better. I was still very afraid of what was happening, but at least knew I was in a safe place. At this point I believe that about 30 – 50 minutes had passed overall. Everything was still shaking and the intense moments still occurred. I kept on wondering how long it would last and when I had reached the midpoint of the experience.
Then something absolutely insane happened. I began talking to myself and could not stop. I started to say something and then paused for a second and continued talking. I have no idea how long this went on for, I only knew that I was talking about my experience. I had no control over what was being said I only knew that I was saying it. After this stopped I tried to get a hold of myself. I did not know how much time had passed, but soon realized that my girlfriend was not yet there. So I called her. She had tried to get an extension on her curfew in order to come to the party and her mom had told her to go home. We talked briefly and the conversation left me feeling depressed, I felt that I had done something wrong and that she had chosen not to come.
Then I found my remedy to it all, it was hunger. I suddenly realized I was hungry, luckily I had grabbed a Gatorade and had a box of cheese crisps crackers. Eating and drinking made me feel better. Then a friend came out looking for me and got into the car. We talked for a while, although for what I do not remember. This also comforted me. Within about 20 minutes I was feeling a great deal better, although not back to 100%. I was still hazed and could not function all that properly.
The next morning I woke up and still felt high. My mind was still in a haze and all my thoughts and emotions were intensified. I would start to think about something and go into a trance of thought. It was sort of like a daydream. I also continued to feel out of body, and had a lack of control. Many of the thoughts that I had the night before still bothered me, especially those of my girlfriend. They were making me very depressed and anxious as well.
I am now opting to take a little weed break, I don’t plan to smoke for a month. So that when the long-awaited 4/20 arrives I will be good to go.....hopefully.
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