H. B. Woodrose
Citation: Sir. Fallen Angel. "The Double Trip: An Experience with H. B. Woodrose (exp26354)". Erowid.org. May 26, 2007. erowid.org/exp/26354
This report is typed by me about 3 days after the event, and I can tell you its an event I will never forget.
We were supposed to take LSD on a thursday night in a Squatted place in 'Diemen', a little town close to Amsterdam in Holland. We were trying to get LSD but there was no one that could supply us with the 'king of drugs'. I arrived there on thursday at about 16:00 and since we did not get LSD we decided to get some Hawaiian baby woodrose seeds, since I had some good previous experience with them and the others wanted to try them too.
So we whent to a smartshop and got the seeds, whent back home, smoked some joints and took the seeds at about 20:00. There were 3 people taking the seeds, me and two female friends of mine. On of them took tripdrugs lots of times before but never saw anything weird, and when she did not see anything about an hour after taking the seeds she started complaining about the fact that she never saw anything when taking tripdrugs. She also started to get into a light 'bad' trip, it was clear by her voice. Later on she left. From that moment on I did not feel too good, being afraid she would end up in a bad trip. The other girl was fine, enjoying perfect visual effect. We were lying on a balcony looking at the stars by the way.
From that moment onwards (it must have been something like 22:15) things started going bad for me. Visualizations stopped and fear started to kick in. Fear of the well known 'bad trip'. I was feeling that fear because I did not feel 100% ok after the complaining of the girl and the idea she was going to have a bad trip. Because of the fear of a bad trip my hartbeat started to increase, I was panicking. At this point all visual effects stopped completely. I was freaking out and my hartbeat was reaching high levels. In the room next to the balcony there were about 12 people playing guitar and having fun. I had them sent away since they were also pulling me more and more towards a bad experience. They all left except for the girl that was enjoying the trip. This for the first time ever was a bad thing, because of the fact she was enjoying it I started to get kind of jelous of her, and started feeling more bad, wishing that I could also have fun. Then, whilst my hartbeat was (in my perception) extremely high (I have this little 'hartproblem' so all hartbeat increases in my perception were a total threat of me being killed) and I was really thinking I would die at that very moment. Then the most intense fear ever started taking over, however I did not want to tal about it since I did not want the girl next to me to end up in a bad trip as well. I was just lying there, shivering, shaking, totally scared, wishing it would end..
During that period I took a look at my mobile phone and I saw that it was only 23:00 and experience tought me that a trip would last up to 10 hours. That would mean I still had 7 horribly bad hours to go. I was starting to get afraid of the fact that I might get caught in this bad trip forever since, as we all know, mental hospitals are full of that sorts of people, all these thoughts were crossing my mind and making me more and more afraid. At this point I had reached the feeling of total terror. I was more afraid as I had ever been or ever will be. I was completely utterly terified. In a clear moment then I realized I needed someone I could trust, someone who was capable of pulling me out of this hell. I grabbed my mobile phone and called 'maartje', the person with who I had my first LSA trip and since it was the best trip ever I thought hearing her voice would make me remember the good times and pull me out of it. Luckily she answered but she was not really in an opertunity to talk. We talked for a little while (15 minutes or so) and I calmed down a bit. We hung up and I tried to enjoy my trip again. After 10 minutes again I was pulled down, this time because of the fact I was totally alone and I realized there was no-one that could help me here.
Now total panick came since I could not find my phone, which at that moment was the only link to people I completely trusted. I knew there was a phone in the house but I could not remember any phonenumbers. Eventually I found my phone and called 'Achiel', a friend of mine who I totally trust and who at that moment was the only one who could get me out of it. Luckily he also answered the phone and was alone, in the middle of a boring movie, so he had all the time in the world. We talked on the phone for about 3 or 4 hours, and slowly, really slowly I was getting back to myself and losing my had trip. We hung up a couple of times in between since some people that also did drugs required some attention and rest, this since they were also feeling the beginning of a bad trip. In the end when we hung up for the last time I was finally in a good mood again, able to be alone without sliding away. From that moment onwards the trip again became what it should have been. Everything was breathing and vibrating, looking 1000x more alive and beatiful as ever before. The euphoric feeling that I had the two previous times with LSA returned and I lay alone in the living room enjoying my further trip for the next 3 hours or so. Then the stuff started to stop working and I whent into a peacefull beautiful sleep.
In the end my conclusion is that I should have had more respect for the drug. Since I had done LSA a couple of times before I thought I could just take it anywhere, anytime. This very very clearly was not the case. For that same reason I decided to never take drugs again without having someone there who I can trust, or who I love, and I am going to take them in an envoirement that I choose. The feeling during a bad trip can only be described as primal fear, there is no way to describe this if you have'nt been there once. This story is told by me to inform and warn other people, since I don't even wish my worst enemy this kind of experience.
Overall it has been a good epxerience, it has tought me a lot and I still had 3 or 4 hours of good trippin, in the end I never would have wanted to miss this, it has been very educating.
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