Citation: 2lovers8lucy. "How High It Can Take You Is Not Always Good: An Experience with LSD (exp111135)". Erowid.org. Oct 5, 2018. erowid.org/exp/111135
Here's a little background of my drug use.
LSD: most I have taken is 10 tabs, was just fine even drove around town 'exploring' as me and my lady called it
Pain pills: oxy 10's, hydrocodone (pill and liquid) my favorite drugs are opiates.
MDMA: I love Molly, me and my friends would always snort the shit as it hit us faster and gave us more of a tweaky feeling and I liked the tweaky feelings
Meth: was told it was Molly, but upon looking at it, it was obvious meth, but didn't stop us from doing it. I really enjoyed meth a lot, but feel I got lucky the first time and didn't get addicted
Addy: not my favorite thing in the world as I took 2 30mg er's and was up for 2 days in a row
Alcholo: not bad, Can be enjoyable, but I would prefer to stay sober if anything.
Air duster: my most favorite thing in the world. Nothing compares to airduster in my mind.
Pot: used to be a heavy smoker, but it's just not worth it anymore
Kratom: I also love kratom as it mimics opiates for me and I can not do any 'real' drugs per say
Xanax: I used to really enjoy Xanax, the mentally calming effect it had, the carelessness, but I grew to hate it because of the stupid decisions I would make when I'm barred out. (Huffed gas)
Gas: didn't really effect me, felt like a weak air duster, so I didn't enjoy it.
With that out of the way, I would like to say I am some what an experienced tripper. I used to kind of sell acid, and was tripping about every other day. Basically when I took acid, I was trying to force a spiritual experience, see crazy shit, etc. I never really respected her. I loved the intensity of it which is why I always went for the higher than 'normal' dosages.
So let's get into the story that scarred me, and made me never ever wanna drop acid again!
Me and the lady couldn't really do drugs out of fear of getting tested, so we resulted to drugs that didn't stay long in your system: Molly and acid, basically.
One night we had planned to trip with our friend out of town. We had planned it basically a week or two in advanced, our friend was gonna drop two and our plan was to drop 5, but ended up doing 8. Most of the acid I got was pure, never the fake synthetic shit, I wasn't about that. All of my acid had been on blotter paper, whether it had art on it, or just white on white. This acid we got, we were told it was a little weaker than the last batch, so that's when we decided to take 8. We had a total of 20 tabs, 16 of them were mine and the ladies, 4 was the homies.
So we get to our friends house, about 40 mins away and right as we got there dropped the tabs. I didn't really keep track of time, but I will guesstimate when everything happened.
T:4:20 p.m.- 8 tabs on mine and my ladies tounge, friend did not drop his yet because wasn't sure if he wanted to trip or not. The acid had no taste, other than the cardboard it was on. The guy I got it from drew on the hit sizes.
T:4:40- lady tells me she is already getting pretty heavy visuals and is feeling quite off, she's acting kind of distant, but we can both be quote shy at some times, so I thought it was that. It did strike me as odd that she was already getting heavy visuals, but we both didn't eat anything the whole day for this reason, and this was the most acid shes eaten so I didn't think that much of it. (I wish I had. Looking back now, there was so many warning signs of her having a bad trip)
T 5:30 p.m. I'm starting to slightly come up and our friend, my lady and I had just gotten back from the gas station (our friend drove) and we had gotten some smokes, me and my lady chain smoke like crazy on acid. For me it kinda levels me and keeps me connected to the world. So we're walking through the woods behind my homies house and everynow and then my lady says the phrase *it happened again*, I didn't think to much of it (I wish I had, like I said, so many warning signs of a bad trip was coming) I'm starting to get enhanced vision, H.D. Vision, as I call it and the lady said, the next day, that she was tripping harder than ever at that point, she said it looked like the grass was coming off the ground, and everything looked very cartoonist
T:6 p.m.- were out of the woods now and I can feel the acid in full effect. It was hitting me very hard at this point, I was seeing intense tracers, depth perception was fucked, and some very beautiful patterns all over the ground. The friend asked us '1-10 how hard are you tripping?' And instantly the lady said '10' which really struck me as odd cause I was just now starting to come up and she was saying she's full blown tripping.
Some time passes, we watched the Simpson's Halloween special, very hilliarious on acid, we were all enjoying our self, but I could not shake the feeling that something was off. The movie ended and we were all a little hungry, so we went down stairs to see what there was, nothing really looked appealing so we just got water. The lady was acting very different, she just seemed so disconnected from everything around her. I shook it off, thinking it's just the large amount of acid we'd done, and her being kinda shy around newish people (our friend)
We go back to my friends room, and start playing some dead rising. It was very difficult to play, I was tripping really hard, but not getting very much visuals, more just a 'mind trip', I guess you could say. The lady was seeming reaalllyyy disconnected from the world at this point. She kept saying 'I wanna play a game', and we'd hand her the controller and she wouldn't really do much, so shed hand it back and then a couple minutes later 'I wanna play a game'.
Eventually, it was just my friend playing a game and I was on social media on my phone and just talking to my friend and the lady everynow and then, but the lady kept saying 'it happened again over and over, about 5 minutes in between each other I estimate.
I started to think, maybe I'm doing something that I do not realize, and she doesn't like it. I wish that were the case.
So we go downstairs cause we wanted to smoke, just me and the lady, our friend was doing something I don't remember and he didn't wanna get up. We're on the porch of my friends house and smoking a cig, and I ask my lady 'are you okay? You seem kind of off' and all she says is 'yeah' we keep smoking our stoggy, and I remember looking out onto his front yard (his house is on a decent sized bit of land), and it was dark by this time, and all I could see was fractals, patterns and colors. I had never experienced this before and it kinda threw me off and freaked me out, but I held it together and just focused on something else. I told the lady, 'this Is kind of getting really intense and I just want it to stop, but I also don't want it to stop', this was maybe the 3 hour mark of our trip, so we hadn't even hit our peak yet. The lady agreed with me, but still something seemed so off with her.
We go back inside and bull shit around with our homie, and he tells was about an hour prior, he had dropped 2 of his tabs, and that made us happy. I loved getting fucked up with friends.
About 30 minutes to an hour pass, and we go back down stairs to go out side and mess around in his big garage, and smoke cigs and he was gonna smoke some pot.
He goes down stairs and goes outside, but when my lady started down the stairs, she fell flat on her back and slid all the way down the stairs, it was kind of comical how she slid down them, but it was the love of my life, so I didn't find it all that funny. I made sure she was okay and asked again If she was okay (mentally) and she said 'okay' or 'I think' so this whole time were still trying to get outside my lady was becoming more and more disconnected from reality. We were all standing around talking, she was against the wall and just collapsed for some reason (she didn't pass out or anything, just lost her footing I guess). When she stood up, the look in her eyes was very odd, it was pure embarrassment, mixed with 'why tf did I just do that, is everything okay?' It kinda broke my heart, that look in her eye because she wanted to make a good impression on my friends and be 'cool' and didn't wanna make a fool of her self. She can be very self conscious sometimes, but she has kind of grew outta that and also all my friends love to chill with her and I, so this night did not ruin that.
After her falling, things started to change for the worse, she was fully disconnected from reality at this point, but I was also to high to realize what was going on exactly. In my head, it was the acid making her feel pretty good and just goofing around, doing weird stuff, but it was anything but that.
At one point she was laying on the floor on her stomach, shaking her rump-a-dump around acting very unlike her self. This was very odd because she can also be insecure as well, and is nothing like a hoe that'll do this for the fuck of it, but again I was still to high from the acid to put two and two together that she was so far from reality, she didn't really know what she was doing.
We finally make it out side and goto the garage when things really went down hill. We were all messing around, giving each other shit and the lady was acting all big and tough so we told her to show us and pump some iron. She didn't really acknowledge that and did something else I can't recall. She started acting very violently towards me and my friend, but I was still under the impression she was goofing around and having a good time, so we kinda wrestled a little bit, but she was actually hitting kind of hard and struck me with a good right, so I put a stop to that. At one point she was screaming and yelling and that started making my friend kind of angry because of his neighbors possibly calling the cops and they kinda got into it and started at each other, but I instantly shoved both of them back telling them to knock it off.
My lady friend at this point was uncontrollable, walking/running around yelling at the top of her lungs, flaling around and what not.
We took her inside due to the scare of possible cops being involved, and she just wouldn't stop acting like this. My friend was still coming up on his 'cid and for a start to a trip all of this going on would not call for a good trip. He actually started to have a panic attack, and at one point was almost in tears. This whole time, I just wasn't really taking this serious as I really thought she would just start acting normal again and she was just enjoying her self. I thought she was horny cause she kept saying certain things pointing towards that and the acid was making it really intense to where she couldn't control her self (I really don't know what was going through my brain. I was so god damn high from the acid) so I took her to the bathroom, adjusted my self ;), and showed her that I could not stick it in right now due to the acid giving me limp dick. She saw that and kinda straightened up for a minute and I felt so much relieve, but then 'boom!' She was right back to acting how she was.
Driving while intoxicated, tripping, or extremely sleep deprived is dangerous and irresponsible because it endangers other people. Don't do it!]
She was screaming at the top of her lungs now, and my friend was panicking more and more at this point and yelled 'do we need to take her to the hospital or something' and I said 'bro I really don't know this has never happened' (this was when it finally clicked that something was seriously rong roughly 4-4-1/2 hours into this trip) I told her, 'if you don't straighten up were gonna have no choice but to take you to the hospital. You're parents are gonna be involved (she was kicked outta her house and not on good terms and moved in with me) cops etc' and she sobered up really quick and said 'okay' and I said 'you good now, babe?', and she said something that shed been repeating a lot and so I carried her outta the bathroom saying to the friend ' were going to the hospital idk what's going on with her, Can we take your car I don't trust mine?', and he was basically already ready. I carry her out of the house, she pukes a little while being carried, I've been around tons of people puking, and puked a lot my self from duster, so it doesn't bother me, but something about this little puke she did the sound of it I can still hear clearly to this day (8-9 months later) I don't know how to explain it. On the way to hospital, I text my mom our safe word (shes a great mother, she doesn't like me doing drugs or anything, but she said if I'm ever in danger or anything text her this safe word and she'll be there as fast as she can) she wasn't replying so I called her 2 times in a row and she finally answered and I explained to her the situation. At this point, in the car, my lady was kinda screaming and what not, but basically just repeating certain phrases over and over, and having spastic movements. My mom told us to not go to hospital so no one official is involved, including her parents like right as we were at the front door, so we just parked there. My step dad, I think is secretly very knowledgeable when it comes to drugs, so I'm sure that was his idea. They told us to get some orange juice to see of that'll help her, it ended up being spilt over my friends car. My friend started freaking out even harder, and couldn't drive and for some odd reason, I was practically sober, wasn't getting much visuals unless I really focused, and felt pretty calm in the head to try to keep the peace between us all, so I drove us to the house.
Basically by now she was not screaming or anything, she was just repeating phrases over and over. She would be like this until she came down, some 6 hours later. This killed me to see her like this. This girl is the love of my life, and seeing her so out of control, having no idea what she's doing, out of her mind hurt so bad and it still sometimes does to this day.
We're at the house now safely, thank God, and she's just doing the same stuff, my parents show up roughly 15 minutes later, and when I'm in their car everything feels so much better. Everything is so much more calmer, I knew we were gonna have a nice long talk about this, but that wasn't the matter at the moment. I felt so safe with them, and finally for the first time that night, I knew my girl was gonna be okay. I left everything I brought with me there, even my shoes, I just wanted to leave and be in the comfort of my parents. I gave my friend a hug cause he was shaking and rocking back and forth and kind of crying and said 'I love you bro' and left.
We made it home and my parents went inside cause my lady was being difficult and I couldn't get her out of the car and she was basically under control, just looping out loud still. It was so odd, I would tell her things about the real world and her pupils would shrink back to normal size, and for litterallly a split second, I knew my lovely girl was back, but then instantly bam, she was gone, pupils so large there was no color in them, just black from such dilated pupils. Those sights of her eyes have scarred me and I can still picture it crystal clear. It was the oddest/heart wretching thing to see her come back to reality fully, then a second later she was gone. I hated my self for getting us the acid, saying we should just take 8 a piece, I hated my self for everything that lead up to that. I got her inside and our dog even knew something was wrong with her, he was being extra sweet to her, giving her kisses and he even had a worried look on his face. We got her laid down in bed and she sat there in the same position for an hour or so, looping away.
Then another couple of hours she was finally able to fall asleep, but I was still worried so everynow and then I would listen to her breathing, feel her heart beat to make sure it wasn't to fast or to slow. I even woke her up sometimes when she would make noises asking her if she was okay. I kept saying, 'I'm so sorry for tonight', but she didn't understand why I was saying that and I told her, 'I'll tell you in the morning'. While she was asleep, kind of, I would go to our back porch and smoke cigs and just cry to my self. I was so torn up that I would let me and the love of my life get into that situation, I'm here to protect her and never let her get into sticky situations, never let her get hurt or anything, and I failed.
I would go to our back porch and smoke cigs and just cry to my self. I was so torn up that I would let me and the love of my life get into that situation, I'm here to protect her and never let her get into sticky situations, never let her get hurt or anything, and I failed.
I morally failed at doing that all night. It was the worst feeling ever looking back at that night, the worst empty, sickening feeling in my stomach I have felt to this day. I still feel that sometimes. The next morning when she woke up, she sat straight up and looked around super confused as to why we were back at our house, she didn't remember a thing. I explained to her what had happened and she could not believe it, but slowly some memories she had of that night slowly came back to her. Her side of the story is jaw dropping, she had a completely different experience then what had actually happened. Literally a completely different story than what I just told.
After this night, I swore to my self and her that I would never ever let us get into that kind of situation ever again. I made it my goal to look out for her if we were doing drugs, rather it just pot, alcohol, anything. I would never let her go through this again, because one time when she was looping out, she said 'I just want it to stop, make it stop please'. This stood out to me cause again in that moment, my girl was back, but was gone right after she said that. I knew she would come back enough to realize she was miserable, but just couldn't do anything about it. It literally broke my heart in so many ways.
We will probably never tough acid again, due to the fear of this trip. It is engraved into our minds and memory. It will stick with us forever.
We are in a lot better place now. I'm in my dream college, passing it with flying colors, and she is in school for something she really enjoys. I'm so happy for us. We have so much good going for us, I know we're gonna have a great future, despite our interactions with drugs.
I will talk to her after work and see if she wants to include what was going on in her world for this report. If not, you guys will know.
Safe travels, comrades!
Hi I'm the little lady of the story you just read and now I'll tell you my side of everything:
My drug experience
Pot: use to love it then it became more of a struggle
Acid: both good and bad experiences
Xanax: I love it but it makes me stupid, though I do wish I could experiment more with it
Molly: absolutely amazing
Meth: best hyped feeling I've ever experienced
Extacy: second best feeling I love feeling more open while on x
Oxy: very mellow drug and helped me do my job a lot easier
Duster: it was fun but probably the most stupid drug I've done
Gas: not really that much to my experience so I'll give it a 1/10
Kratom: it's a good substance when yoou can't actually do drugs
Morphine: by far the best thing on this earth, it is the best thing I have experienced so far with any substance I've done.
How I refer to what happened that night was me being in my dream world. I'll be honest I have always been the kind of person to keep quite about my opinion if someone else wanted something different (this is a bad habit I don't suggest getting into) and that night I had a bad feeling about tripping that much and with someone else but I blew it off because I have the tendency to ovethink things and I figured it was just that. I still felt good enough about everything to think everything would be okay.
When I started feeling the effects from dropping acid,about 20 minutes later, I was feeling good but I suppose more retreated now that I look back on it. When we got back to the house after getting stogys I started feeling really odd and kind of not good, it was a lot of effort to stand so I sat at the table in the yard for a minute, when it seemed like something was really off I decided to go knock on the bathroom where my boyfriend was, I wanted to tell him there was something up but for one it seemed like too much effort to really talk and two I didn't want to seem like I was trying to bring the mood down so I said nothing. Another note is with a couple of the last trips before this one, I would get sick on the come up which started up randomly after a few times tripping so I thought it was something I was going to get over and start feeling better again.
The next thing I remember is walking through the woods and my boyfriend and his friend were walking ahead and I couldn't hear what they were saying, I felt a brief moment of loneliness and had a slight thought they were talking about about me which was just an irrelivent paranoid thought( this small moment has played a dramatic roll in me now even today which I will explain later on) but as we were walking that's when I saw the sharp cartoon grass explained in the first part of the story and that was the last visual I saw the whole night. I supposed I had begun blacking out between those periods because the next moment I experienced was we were in the room playing a game
Now bare with me this is where things get confusing. When we were playing the game I asked to play and in my dream world I thought I was doing good but my boyfriend kept saying I was gonna die which was confusing.. This was my first glimpse of reality when I was in my dream world. I feel like if someone would had told me to snap out of it right then and there I might have been okay because that was the last moment of the real world that I had before it got all distorted by my dream world. The next glimpse I remember was us walking down the stairs and me falling all the way down. The pain kind of brought me back to what was going on in reality but my mind was still morphing it into some dream of mine.
The next thing that happened that I can actually semi explain was when we were in the garage and both my boyfriend and his friend kept telling me to get mad over and over (this didn't actally happen in reality) I decided to yell and run over to the punching bag and hit it and then at another time me and my boyfriend were having a hitting match which in my dream world seemed normal and fun( its like those moments when you dream something completely odd but you think it's okay anyway until you wake up) I remember slapping my boyfriend in the face hard and he did it back and I felt a pain in my cheek that made my right eye water and for a second I thought that this wasn't normal but in an instant my dream state sucked me back in and made it seem like it was a playful thing that was okay. The thing about my dream state is everything in it seemed so dark but instead of letting me be afraid of it, it was convincing me it was good, and if anything negative happened it would almost shield me from it and I would be all happy again.
The next big event that happened was we were all in the car driving and I was completely in my dream world at this point. It was like I was hitting duster and blacking out which is a scary thought because I was already blacked out in a dream state but when I 'hit duster' I would completely black out and later on wake up, this happened multiple times and one time our friend, who in the real world WAS our friend, but in my dream state I thought was my boyfriend, kept smacking my cheek trying to wake me up from passing out( this never actually happened in reality and I never even actually passed out at all.) When I was 'conscious' and we were driving I would wake up to us stopping at the same stop sign, passing the same semi, and pulling up to the same store over and over. It would happen in the same order, I would wake up experience one thing, pass out experience the next, and then it would all repeat over and over.
When I was 'conscious' and we were driving I would wake up to us stopping at the same stop sign, passing the same semi, and pulling up to the same store over and over. It would happen in the same order, I would wake up experience one thing, pass out experience the next, and then it would all repeat over and over.
As I came to find out the next day there never was a semi that passed us at all and the store I recalled we never pulled up to either.
I remember us driving and someone on Bluetooth talking to my boyfriend crying and saying ' she needs help' and so on which sounded to me as if we were trying to make an intervention for someone on drugs and during that moment it felt like me, our friend, and my boyfriend were all like brother and sister and the person on the phone was our mom who I imagined being a overweight person, little did I know it was my boyfriends mom on the phone talking and everything I heard her say didnt match up with what was actally said but they were discussing about me, (also his mom is not fat at all haha) As the night went on I would pass out and wake up to find one detail change than how it was before, the car would be a different color or the seats would be different. And I believe it was a transition from our friends car to my boyfriend's moms car. I would continue to do so until everything was transitioned completely. Every time I would wake I would see little patches of the real car and reality as it really was, but even though I could still basically see everything my mind was still converting it into a dream Some how.
Everything kind of seemed calmer after and I do remember pulling up to my mother in laws house and lying in bed. This whole time I just thought this was one big huge trip and I was just going along with it, it never crossed my mind anything wasn't was unusual from all the other times I tripped, the last visual I saw was the grass, everything else was just a dream. When I woke up the next day and realized we weren't still at our friends house and we were in fact at his mom's, everything was so confusing and I kept thinking about what all was real and what wasn't, turns out not much of what I actually experienced was real.
A big lesson I learned from that night is to never abuse Lucy because she will fuck my shit up. From the first time taking acid it changed how I react to smoking pot. I will say that since that night, instead of smoking for comfort and joy, it's been a constant battle that has messed with me ever since. When I said to remember that brief moment of loneliness when I couldnt hear my boyfriend and friend talk, and how I thought they were talking about me, well every time I smoked pot after that, I could hardly hear what people were saying even if there right in front of me, and I constantly thought everyone is talking about me and even though it was a long time ago, acid is still affecting me through pot. One tiny little moment that happened that night, out of everything else, has stuck with me still. I am now incredibly paranoid which I use to not be and I hardly enjoy smoking any more, it's made my social life horrible and I still don't really know how to get over it.
I am now incredibly paranoid which I use to not be and I hardly enjoy smoking any more, it's made my social life horrible and I still don't really know how to get over it.
It's basically branded in my brain and if I would have known how strong acid can be even long after a trip, I would have been much more smarter with my choices.
Thank you guys for taking your time to read this. I know it is long, both of our experiences during this night, but there is no short version of this trip.
Again, Safe Travels, Commrades!
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