Citation: nervewing. "Eternally Shaken Pleasantly Burned: An Experience with LSD, Ephenidine & 2C-C (exp108608)". Erowid.org. Apr 24, 2017. erowid.org/exp/108608
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T0:00-Administered 3 tabs of LSD and took a shower.
T0:30-Exit shower, feel immaculate and clean, purified and comfortable. I walk into my cozy room, lit up by the afternoon sun, the beams of light manifest in the smoky atmosphere from the incense I burnt. A blunt I rolled beforehand awaits me on my desk.
T0:40-Slowly builds. Based on my history with acid (usually I would take 3 and it would be very manageable and malleable), I figured this would be a light experience that I would accent with other substances, a sort of background trip to be built upon. A friend comes over and doses. He and my roommate and I are relaxing in my room, I decide to light up that blunt.
T0:50-Holy shit that blunt. My roommate and friend are hanging out talking. I eventually go silent and lie back on my bed. I am rising so heavily I cannot really communicate at all. I close my eyes and am greeted by an explosive well of fractals and blooming forms. It beckons me, but I cannot dive in while sharing the space with others, that would make me feel vulnerable and reckless. But this is getting out of hand. Auditory hallucinations begin to chew their voices apart and I can feel the gentle breeze at the edge of a raging storm of thought loops and ego death. The breeze carries a flurry of open eyed visuals, patterns and fractals relentlessly playing themselves on my field of vision. This is going to be big. Something is going to happen. I feel very small as the room stretches away from me, obliterating all depth perception, perspective and sense of scale. I can’t do this anymore. I manage to piece together the words and kindly ask them to leave me alone for a bit. Both of them are very experienced with psychedelics/familiar with my penchant for doing them alone, so they politely comply and go downstairs to watch a movie.
T1:10-It seems another instance of no accurate timestamps for like an hour and a half, as time is violently dismantled. Alone at last, I let the storm wash over me. I lie down on my bed and close my eyes and bam-Imagine a frail house getting blasted by the winds of a hurricane, wood and debris flying off, until at last the rotting beams snap and the entire structure gets flattened, mowed over by the wrath of air being flung about. That was me, I was flattened and mowed over by a psychedelic gale. The wind comes in chunks, each one resonating and vibrating my bones and essence as it strikes me. Each strike, I come apart more and more, I vibrate at higher frequencies until my being is shredded, split, utterly dismantled and mangled. I love acid because I usually feel in control, I am euphoric and I feel enhanced by psychedelic magic. This time however, I am at the mercy of this amorphous storm.
I begin to realize what I’ve gotten myself into. The original plan was to take acid, then 2C-C, and then chill out on the couch with my friends. That wasn’t going to happen, that wasn’t going to happen for a while. I could barely stand up. My entire field of vision more or less melted and warped, it was familiar and undistinguishable. My short term memory began to short out as time got utterly abstracted.
I tried to throw on some calming music. Ho boy. This is where things got really freaky. The sounds of familiar sounds had become alien and unrecognizable. It was like the sounds were dissected, every layer was split apart and run through a tangle of distortion. Soon things began to get creepy. The songs would begin to slow down and speed up, seemingly randomly, with the accompanying drop/rise in pitch. This was it, this was my reality breaking apart, I was truly sensing a rift in reality stronger than any I had ever done. I feel like I broke everything. I felt like this was the big one, this was the trip that would end in severe consequences due to its sheer power. The world as I knew it cracked open, and there was doubt in my mind as to whether it would ever come back. But whatever, just ride it out. I felt like I had damaged reality.
I put on very minimalist calming slow ambient music, it helped a bit (how I managed to operate my computer is beyond me). This great sense of dread and foreboding overcame me. It was the sort of fear when you are exploring an abandoned building, and a chill runs down your spine, when you hear a sound in the distance when you think you are alone. I felt like I had hacked into reality, split it open to reveal the inner workings and the mechanisms that drive it. I suppose I could make this analogous somehow to some scientific definition of “dimensions”, just iterations of space packaged within each other, each one influenced by the one it was within. Okay, I don’t know if that’s actually how dimensions are defined, but with my limited knowledge on the subject that’s the impression I have.
fear however, came from the fact that something did not want me doing that. This something was not even a “thing” it was beyond our definitions, it was an essence of darkness and malice that could not even exist in our world, for it was beyond existence. Perhaps it was not malicious, but merely protective. However it felt, it did not want me here at all. I felt like punishment was incoming, that some strange interdimensional police would come and trap me in some asphodelic eternity.
If I could give a sensory aspect to this, the visual space of this shattered reality was onion shaped and bulging pulsing forms, vibrating with the overwhelming psychedelic wind in a gelatinous aether. It was here that I realized how much of a role acid played in my “dextroverse” (LSD+DXM+DPH+some tryptamine) experiences, which I had in the past mostly attributed to the DXM. The sounds were… okay imagine a drumbeat, a deep bass that reverberated with a wicked splash, getting warped repeatedly, its edges softening each time, its tone dropping each time. This beat was the sound of me being chewed apart by the acid, it was the steady sound of reality methodically breaking apart. I cannot place why, but this was so fundamentally disturbing, the sensory aspect of this has given me a newfound respect and deep deep fear of the dark and undisturbed depths of LSD.
I could pull myself out briefly. In one instance the concentric rainbows on my computer screen warped into spider like creatures. In another I picked up pen and paper and began to draw. It anchored me and kept me from accidentally falling into the forbidden space I had been delving into. I felt like I was being exposed to so much information, that this rift was leaking forbidden knowledge into my head. I could not write this, but at the time I felt like drawing it was a way of encoding and recording it. Of course the drawing failed to convey any of this information once I was in a sober state. Other times of brief lucidity, I wanted to take a benzo, I wanted to tap out and hit the eject button. Oddly enough, I was enjoying this deep disturbance, it was like a horror movie, but I had pals over and wasn’t prepared for /in the mood for a trip this intense.
I had pals over and wasn’t prepared for /in the mood for a trip this intense.
If I had planned for this, this could probably have gone much deeper, but I had to restrain my brain.
T2:25-Okay. Okay, the storm is passing, the winds are slowing. I am still tripping extremely hard, but at last the great well of forbidden knowledge was closed to me, and I was no longer at risk of a true crisis of my reality. I decided to go downstairs. My friends were watching Animatrix. I sat and watched with them, saying nothing as I tried to gently ride and navigate the comedown. The matrix… oh boy what a wrong thing to watch after my experience. The concept of something operating under our reality that did not want to be found out… it was truly hammered home. It was kinda scary, but I was out of the woods now, so it wasn’t too bad. Very intense to witness though.
T3:10-The movie ends. We put on another one, an anime movie called ninja scroll. Some attempts at conversation are made but I am too jarred to maintain them. Ninja scroll is fucking sweet, just beautiful animation, cool action and strange characters with cool powers. It plays out like a videogame, just a dude fighting a series of powerful foes. But it was so cool and well animated. I noticed I wasn’t viewing it super analytically like I typically do with media while on/coming down from acid.
T3:40-Another friend comes over. I am still jarred and tripping hard, but I feel highly functional compared to how I was before. We hang out and draw stuff for a while. Lots of kush gets smoked. We go back to my room and hang out there, drawing etc. It’s fun, I begin to articulate my experience to my friends and we have nice conversation. My friend who was coming down from his trip decided to try deschloroketamine, so I shared a dose. I personally popped a cap of 70 mg ephenidine. I was in a more comfortable and better state now, so I figured why not, ephenidine was never too taxing on reality and very manageable. 70 mg is a pretty low dose anyways. We hang out more and talk more about all sorts of things, I feel a bit of numbness as I come up.
T5:40-The ephenidine begins to peak as numbness and dizziness, the typical “dissociative walk” and a sort of brightening of visuals. Very mild. My friends go downstairs to play videogames. I tell them I’ll join them in a bit, because I wanna ramp things up. I decide to try insufflating 2C-C. I am aware that I don’t wanna go back too far again, so I cut out 25 mg and put it in a line. The powder is fluffy and does not need to be crushed. I am kinda scared because it’s a large volume of powder. I get something to bite down on. The horrific pain of snorting 2C’s barrels in full force, the feeling of snorting glass or getting shot in the face with an arrow. I am in so much pain. I am immobilized. After about 5 minutes I go downstairs, I am still in immense pain but I feel like I can interact with people at least. The pain persists for about another 20 minutes, longer than my experiences with 2C-B, though this might be because of the volume of powder. The drip is another sort of hell, making me feel as though I have a horrendous sore throat, with awful bitter flavor.
T6:00-I am okay now. This is sweet. I am couchlocked and it's so pleasant, I am buzzing and oozing waves of euphoria, everything is so colorful and bright patterns appear on everything. I love it, this is the desired effect, this is great. I am lucid and clearheaded and can interact with people perfectly. This is not exploration, simply augmentation of my reality. I enjoy it a lot.
T8:00-People have left mostly. I am feeling pretty altered still and go to 7/11 with my friends. The night feels like a magical adventure, a colorful expedition with childlike wonder. The ephenidine adds momentum to every step, the 2C-C buries the world in colors. I am so eloquent and articulate, I feel like my mind and intelligence have been enhanced tenfold. I can piece together ideas perfectly, I can form insightful associations and respond quickly and efficiently. This is great, I take advantage of this to talk about all sortsa stuff with my roommates. We get home and play super smash bros. and I am a lot better at it than when in any state. This is a perfect combination of states and substances, I have truly augmented myself as a human.
T9:00-Everyone else has gone to bed. I shower and think about how cool this feels. I decide to try and take advantage of this state and meditate on all sorts of things. It seems this intelligence only works when one is not aware of it however, it is odd like manual breathing. It will only provide me with insight and eloquence if I let it flow naturally, if I let it naturally weasel its way into my thoughts and experiences. I get out of the shower and excitedly write before going to bed, feeling cleansed and mentally satiated.
Wowee. This was the most intense LSD experience I have ever had, if not one of the most intense drug experiences I have ever had. It would’ve definitely been that if I let myself sink into it, if I had not restrained myself for the purpose of being social. But even with restraint, this trip was bursting at the seams, this was intensity and revelation of unimaginable powers and realms. I have a newfound respect for LSD, if not a terrible fear of its unimaginable power and utter unnerving and disturbing strangeness. This was a violation and deconstruction of everything I knew about reality, this was ominous and foreboding, I feared I had broken into the nether, and I would end up like so many explorers, dead and gone in the depths of the unknown. It’s unnerving to think you have shattered your reality and gone to a difference plane, one you may never return from. Hope I didn’t sound too narcissistic and pretentious throughout this piece. Sorry for it being so long.
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