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Hellish Halloween
MDMA
Citation:   hoobs. "Hellish Halloween: An Experience with MDMA (exp108296)". Erowid.org. Oct 17, 2018. erowid.org/exp/108296

 
DOSE:
1 capsl oral MDMA
  1 glass oral Alcohol - Beer/Wine
  1 hit smoked Cannabis
I had bought tickets to this annual bowling party/rave in my city a couple weeks before Halloween, so I had to go, even if I was a bit apprehensive. At the party I ran into a few friends, including a girl I'd hooked up with a few times in the past (about a month before the party). Everything was great, and one of my friends asked if I wanted to do some Molly. I said yes and she took me to a guy who was selling it, I bought a capsule and took it.

Well about 25 minutes later I'd noticed I had lost track of my friends, and the molly was just starting to kick in, I tracked my friends down by the bowling area, they all had beers so I bought one and joined them. Soon it started to seem like some of them didn't like that I was there, especially the girl I'd hooked up with.

One of my friends took me to a dance floor and I enjoyed myself for about 5 minutes until I got thirsty and realized I had lost track of my friend again. Up until that point I was feeling good, dancing, talking to people, and even posing for selfies in my costume. It all started to go downhill when I realized I couldn't find my friend, so I headed to an outside area, I found them smoking a joint so I thought I'd say hi. At this point I was feeling ok, but definitely not as good as before. I passed the joint a couple times and noticed that some of the girls were rolling their eyes at me, immediately, I felt a sense of dread wash over me. I felt like no one wanted me there, that I was ruining the party for everyone else. And, of course, the group had vanished again. It was at this point I realized they were most likely avoiding me.

I have anxiety issues, so the fact that people were avoiding me would be making me feel horrible if I were sober. On molly, it felt even worse.
the fact that people were avoiding me would be making me feel horrible if I were sober. On molly, it felt even worse.
I went back to the bowling area, and the group was there, so I settled at a small dancefloor around 100 or so feet away. I was starting to have a good time again, and the negative thoughts were drowned out by the music, until one of the nicer people in the group came over. He asked why I was by myself, and I told him it was because he was the only one who seemed happy to see me.

He took me over to the group, where it was mostly awkward silences, so I started tipping downward again. I couldn't handle the negativity and I called for a ride home, after being at the party for a little under three hours. Waiting for my ride I started to think maybe I was coming down, but that theory went out the window when I was especially moved by a song that played on the ride home.

After this experience I think it's safe to say that I'll never touch MDMA again. I was severely depressed for at least two weeks after the incident, and I haven't spoken to the people involved ever since. To top it all off, a few months later I'd learned that the girls at the party had been spreading rumors about me for months.

Exp Year: 2014ExpID: 108296
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: 23
Published: Oct 17, 2018Views: 880
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MDMA (3) : Post Trip Problems (8), Difficult Experiences (5), Rave / Dance Event (18)

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