Citation: dsig. "Difficulty Unexpected: An Experience with Methoxetamine & Cannabis (exp104894)". Erowid.org. Apr 24, 2016. erowid.org/exp/104894
With a background of Cannabis, MDMA, Synthetic cannabis (black mamba), LSD, Methylphenidate and 2C-B, I was eager to experiment with dissociatives and finally understand the strange and unique effects that I'd read so much about.
I acquired a sample of MXE from the dark nets, and had previously tried ~15-20mg (I thought it was more like 40mg) sublingually with no noticeable effects. Several weeks later I decided to give it another go.
~45mg of MXE dissolved in warm water to plug, cannabis ground and packed in the vaporizer, all ready to go. I started by sucking up half of the MXE solution in a syringe and putting it in my ass, waiting on my side for 15 minutes before getting up. By the time I got up after those 15 minutes I was feeling the effects, but couldn't exactly pinpoint what those effects were. I felt like I still didn't know what dissociation really felt like, and had a compulsion to up the dose. Half an hour later I lay back on my bed, plugged the rest of the 45mg and started vaporizing.
Very quickly I started to become much more intoxicated, this was it, and indeed it was strange. I got up and went to my desk to go on my computer, still vaping, and noticed that although I still had control of my body, the relationship between my psyche, body and surroundings was disconnected. I'm sure that my movement was affected by this feeling, it felt like I was clumsy and not clumsy at the same time.
it felt like I was clumsy and not clumsy at the same time.
My state continued to intensify as I used my computer, and my sensitivity to sound seemed to increase with it (probably because I had been in silence until turning it on). I tried putting on music, but it seemed so loud so I turned it down lower than the computer fans then just turned it off. Even with the music off, the sound from the fans was deafening and very off-putting. This whole time my vaporizer had been on, but I found it very difficult to use, and wasn't sure if I was forgetting to toke it each time I noticed. The best way to describe it was like I was trying to do so many things at once I struggled to do anything, even though all I was doing was vaporizing (which it felt like I could barely do at all) so I turned it off.
Alongside my intense intoxication from the MXE came a feeling of nausea, which, with the loud computer fans and my inability to properly vape, destroyed any euphoria that the MXE might've given me. The intensity of the experience at this point had built up so much that doing anything at all was overloading. I decided I wanted to turn my computer off and listen to my iPod in bed and chill. I turned on my iPod and straight away it turned off or had a weird screen I hadn't seen before and didn't understand. I tried plugging it into my computer (which I had to turn on again) but still couldn't work out why it wasn't working. I think I spent about 5 minutes not understanding why my iPod had broken before the computer fan noise and intensity really caught up to me, and I quickly gave up with the iPod and went to bed.
Lights off, in my bed feeling intoxicated and nauseous. I can't remember exactly what was going on but I was definitely flying in another world. The CEVs corresponded to my floaty feeling but they weren't colourful or detailed or representative of anything in the real world. I really wanted some music to accompany this part of the experience so I put my earphones in my phone and went onto Youtube. Using the phone keyboard to search was very difficult due to the dissociation, I was out of my body and lost accurate coordination of my fingers, resulting in random letters being pressed. The screen was also quite nauseating to look at in the dark. Eventually I decided that I needed to just focus hard and do it quickly so I could get off my phone and enjoy some music in the dark. I took a deep breath and used all my willpower to bring my consciousness back into my body, while doing this my perspective actually moved from above, back into my head as I typed out Lemon Jelly, hit search then relaxed again in a sigh of relief. I don't know how long I lay in bed for, but after some time there was either an advert or just a song that wasn't giving me the vibes I wanted so I stopped the music. At this point the nausea was persistent enough for me to know I was going to be sick, so I got up and threw up into a container in my room. Throwing up wasn't actually that bad, and after laying down for about 10 minutes then cleaning up I felt a lot better (though still very much under the influence of MXE).
At this point I was well enough to go back on my computer for a bit, I watched some porn and masturbated which was an experience in itself, then went to bed and easily drifted into sleep earlier than I probably would've if I didn't do MXE.
In summary, I was caught completely off guard by the experience. I hadn't braced myself for such a powerful level of intoxication - if it wasn't an M-hole then I was pretty damn close. Without my knowledge of the drug and its class, I think I would've had a much harder time keeping my cool psychologically (not freaking out). This was a few months ago now and I haven't been back since. I'm still keen on properly experiencing the remaining 40mg of MXE I have left without making the same mistakes, just waiting for the perfect time.
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