Huasca Combo (B. caapi & M. tenuiflora)
Citation: White Shaman. "Aya and Finding God: An Experience with Huasca Combo (B. caapi & M. tenuiflora) (exp102415)". Erowid.org. Sep 10, 2018. erowid.org/exp/102415
I will begin by giving you a little background on myself in case this helps to explain my experience. I am a college student who has smoked the occasional marijuana and had a couple of experiences with psilocin (neither of which was that profound for me). I came to ayahuasca to fill my desire for a more spiritual, life-changing psychedelic experience, because I am not yet ready to smoke DMT straight. I had previously suffered from depression and general confusion in life, so this did affect my motives. That being said, I consider myself to have a strong faith in God, and I wished to use aya to encounter Him in a new way.
This is my first trip report, which looks at my extremely positive encounter with ayahuasca, renowned as a shamanistic psychedelic brew of the most profound degree.
I began by ordering white b. caapi vine and mimosa hostilis, a less common combination that came to me highly recommended. Both of these ingredients are legal, although making the brew is not. Each color of vine is said to have a sort of personality or spirit that affects the experience, and white is primarily for healing.
I shredded the vine, which I bought whole, a few nights before making the brew. On the day of brewing, I ate a fairly normal diet, taking care to avoid any foods that are unsafe to mix with aya. The brewing itself took about 7.5 hours and involved making a brew of each plant, reducing/filtering it, and repeating the process twice more.
The brewing itself took about 7.5 hours and involved making a brew of each plant, reducing/filtering it, and repeating the process twice more.
I combined the three washes for each plant so that I had a coffee cup of each. I took the two coffee cups and stored them in the fridge overnight.
Beginning the Plunge
After I woke up, I reheated both brews. You are supposed to drink the caapi first because it will allow your body to absorb the DMT from the mimosa, so I drank it about 20 minutes or so prior to the mimosa. The taste was simply awful; you have to make the brew with an acid like vinegar, so it basically tastes like acidic mud. I gagged about halfway through, regretting my choice to brew a whole cup, but glad the taste was no stronger. There were no immediate effects, and after waiting, I began the mimosa tea. This was MUCH worse than the caapi, and that's saying a lot; it was as though the caapi tea had rotted. To make matters worse, it has the lovely property of drying the mouth on contact. This was the hardest thing I've ever had to choke down, and after a few minutes I vomited once. That happens fairly often from what I've read, but it usually doesn't affect the trip adversely. Luckily, I kept most of the brew down.
Breaking the Surface
It was only about 5-10 minutes later that I really started to notice a difference, but it can take much longer for some people. I happen to have a very fast metabolism, which speeds the effects of most drugs along for me. It began as a sort of sickly feeling, nausea combined with a faster than usual pulse, but it was tempered with a sort of pleasant head warming. Soon, my head began to feel a sort of pressure on it and more warmth, and this sensation began to accelerate gradually as though the DMT were pushing my mind to go faster and faster. Some visuals became noticeable, as well as feeling very distant from my body, in a similar way to shrooms or cannabis but much more obvious. It was sort of frightening, because I could immediately sense the enormous power of aya, and I realized that I was not yet prepared for what was to come. My entire sense of self became a huge point of distress, and I recognized that I would have to fully let go of my ego in order to embrace what was to come, or I would suffer a nightmarish trip. Bear in mind that this intense confrontation came probably about 20 minutes in.
A trademark part of the typical aya experience is what is called the purge, or La Purga. At some point early on in the trip, the drug is expected to cause vomiting. It is commonly believed that this purging is a release of negativity, the ego, one's demons, or other undesirable baggage. In any case, the purge is considered extremely important, because it is the chance to approach aya with the humility needed for a learning experience.
My purge came shortly after the distress I described earlier. I was forced to weigh the consequences of hanging on to myself in an attempt to guide my own trip, or I could choose to face the purge, and let myself become a passenger. I chose to release myself. Almost immediately after accepting the need for the purge, vomit began to flood my mouth, and I had to run to spit it out. This led to a solid minute or so of being bent over with some very violent vomiting, worse than what many have described, but the taste was surprisingly tolerable and I no longer felt at all nauseous.
In the Embrace of Deep Waters
At this point, I had a distinct sense of a greater power within my mind
I had a distinct sense of a greater power within my mind
, what some people refer to as the spirit of ayahuasca if I'm not mistaken. I was gently encouraged to lie down. Having faced the intensity of the purge, aya was now ready to offer healing to me. As I got under my warm covers, I felt as though I was being embraced by a spirit of pure love that only wished me well. Everything I saw at this point was distinctly warped, as though at any time they could shift and become something else. Time slowed to a crawl, and I was drawn very deeply into a new level of consciousness.
As I mentioned, I have a deep relationship with God, and I went into this trip with a strong desire for Him to meet me within it. I soon began to have a clear sense that he was present, and I let him guide me. He showed me my many anxieties about my relationship, my depression, and my search for truth in drugs. Where most drugs had only made me more confused, I now had a firm intuition about the nature of myself. During this time, it was like being a infant, and at first I could not take my head from under the covers because my room seemed so immense. As I grew in the confidence of my intuition, I eventually could come here, but looking out the window was almost impossible because of the size of the world. While I was in the healing process, however, I began to grow more and more peaceful, feeling somewhere between a wise shaman and an innocent child. During this time, I began to whisper the many truths I was learning. Reality in the way we experience it felt like a mere trifle in the wake of all that human consciousness can be.
At this point, it becomes difficult to explain exactly what happened within me, suffice to say that I allowed God to show me many things. I will simply give a list of the highlights.
~~I received a 'small taste' of what heaven is like. It is a place where all people willing to accept love were drawn into God's very being, and people actually became a part of God Himself. I believe that this is humanity's entire reason for existing.
~~Consequently, I felt such an overwhelming love for others that I was brought to the happiest tears I have ever cried. This was beautifully cathartic.
~~I was given the power to cast away all my depression and suicidal thoughts. I left behind my confusion and no longer needed to do drugs.
~~I saw that I could change my entire personality into whatever I desired, and I chose to let God sculpt me into a more productive version of who I am already called to be.
~~I overcame my fear of being oppressed, knowing that even being imprisoned would have no power over my spirit. Human authority has literally no weight before God, and he is not pleased that we institute our own law. See 1 Samuel 8 for some context.
~~I confronted my relationship with my girlfriend and saw how to fix some of our concerns (which I did afterwards).
After barely two hours, God told me that I had learned what I had come to learn, and that was that. I had completed the experience and was brought back to regular consciousness. Many trips last much longer than mine, even up to 12 hours, but I have also read that your trip will take longer if you continue to struggle during it. Having submitted to the brew and let myself learn, the process was relatively painless, but I also acknowledge that it could have been entirely nightmarish if things had been different. I end my report here, adding only that this was the most deeply spiritual experience I could ever hope to imagine.
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