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Date: Tue, 15 Nov 1994 12:07:58 -0800
Subject: Beating piss tests

I noticed you had no text on beating drug tests on the www page.  You may
want to add or use parts of this research paper I wrote.  Please keep me

                          Fooling the Bladder Cops

    During a job interview, have you ever been asked to piss for your new
employer?  New applicants for any of the Fortune 500 corporations are now
being forced to take a drug test.  If you don't want to be a victim in the
drug war, read on!

    This privacy violation costs businesses $1.2 billion for urinalysis of
their workers.  The military is notorious for their strict drug tests. Drug
testing violates peoples 4th amendment right prohibiting unreasonable
searches, and your 5th amendment right protecting you from incriminating
yourself.  Until this unconstitutional drug testing frenzy is put to an
end, people need to learn how to protect themselves from the piss test.

    It is important to know how much of the THC metabolites are in your
urine.  The chart below will give you an approximation; however, it varies
depending on whether you're a regular marijuana user, or just starting. If
you use marijuana for the first time, your urine may be clean of
metabolites in less than a week.  100 nanograms per milliliter of THC
metabolites defines a "positive."  Even second hand [marijuana] smoke will
raise someone to this level.

%   100%  *(0 days, 100%)     Halflife THC concentration = 7 days
T                             %THC means delta % THC metabolites in bloodstream
H   90%                       21 - 28 days'll do-ya



    50%            *  (7days,50%)
                           *  (14days, 25%)
                                     *  (21days,12.5%)
                                              *  (6.75%)
     0%                                                * 3.375  *  1.687%
       0 days     7days    14days    21days   28days   35days   42days

False Positives:
    No laboratory process is completely free from error.  There are some
false positives you should avoid.  Ibuprofen is a common pain reliever has
caused false positives for marijuana use.  However, it takes very high
doses of Ibuprofen to test positive.  The GC/MS(3) tests can distinguish
between Ibuprofen and THC.  Poppy seeds [Usually on breads] lead to false
positives for opiates.  Cold remedies and diet pills result in false
positives for amphetamine use in one third of the test samples given to 40
of the countries leading laboratories.

Flush your system out:
    Hyper saturating your body with fluids like water, and diuretics like
coffee, cranberry juice, and beer will dilute metabolites possibly below
the 100 ng/mL threshold.  Start doing this the night before the test, and
drink as much as you can possibly stand.  If you have short notice, take an
80 milligram dose of prescription diuretic lasix (furosemide).  WARNING!
-Diuretics can be harmful to people with kidney problems, pregnant women,
and diabetics.-  There is a myth that drinking vinegar or taking
phenylpropanolamine (Dexatrim's active ingredient) will work.  They don't.
     Washing your system out will make your urine watery, and samples have
been rejected on the basis of color alone.  Color your sample yellow by
taking 50 to 100 milligrams of vitamin B-2 (found in B-complex vitamins).
This will also help if you plan to dope your sample (explained later).

Give a clean sample:
    Don't give urine from your first urination of the day.  It's the
dirtiest, and can be heavily filled with metabolites.  Urinate a couple of
times before giving a test sample.

Drug Screens:
    Some chemicals will mask traces of drugs in urine.  Two products, Test
Free and Naturally Klean, claim to clear any drug testing for a few hours
after taking. The companies recommend abstaining for a day or two and
drinking lots of fluids.  Both companies claim to have FDA safe ingredients
although they are secretive about the formula.  You can contact the
companies at:

                      Test Free-Zydot Unlimited Inc.,
                            9485 Tulsa OK 74157
                               918/ 747-2400

                    Naturally Klean-Houston Enterprises,
                        PO Box 27776, Tempe AZ 85285
                               602/ 968-0773

    Naturally Clean herbal tea also claims to be an effective product in
defeating urine drug tests for pot and other drugs.  It is consumed shortly
before a test.  A sample can be obtained for a $20 shipping and handling
charge by calling 800/447-4692.

    Zinc Sulfate, available from pharmacists and in a health product Zinc
Challenge, should be taken twice, once the night before and once a few
hours before the test in 250-milligram doses.  WARNING! -Don't take anymore
than this because of potential toxic effects.-  Take zinc sulfate in the
morning when loading up on fluids for the test.  Avoid taking in too many
solids because it may dampen the effect of the chemical.

Doping samples:
    This is a last resort method.  You are going in to take the test, and
haven't taken any of the previous steps.  Doping samples consists of
spiking the sample with different chemicals.  Most of these methods only
work on the standard EMIT(1) test, not on RIA(2) or GC/MS(3) tests.

    If you are subject to random tests, you will want to carry Urine Aid in
your wallet.  Just pour it into the sample.  Urine Aid works every time for
masking pot, but not cocaine or heroin.  Urine Aid can be ordered from:

                         Butterfield-Jay Foundation
                               P.O. Box 57214
                          Oklahoma City, OK 73157
                               405/ 521-URINE
A machine will answer.  Calls will be returned collect.  Two samples for
$25 or ten for $100, for Urine Aid or Powdered Urine (discussed later).
They'll Fed-Ex it next day for an extra $10.
    Dilute your sample heavily with water.  Be sure to use water between 91
and 97 degrees, they may take the temperature of the sample.  Six to ten
drops of bleach detergent or blood added to the sample will test negative.
Draino and vinegar will also test negative.  If you are searched prior to
the test, bear in mind that a few bleach or Draino crystals can be
concealed under the fingernails.  Be warned that Draino, Bleach, and
vinegar change the pH outside the normal body range, and this can be
detected if pH is tested.  Niacin and Golden Seal Tea have shown to work on
occasion.  Golden Seal turns the specimen brown, and some labs are
reportedly testing for Golden Seal.  Liquid soap, or a teaspoon of salt
will test negative, but these crude methods are detectable.  Soap makes the
specimen cloudy.  Table salt puts the density out of normal range.  Lemon
juice is a myth; it will not change the test results.  Visine supposedly
works the best among household products.  They can only su ct that you used
Visine due to inability of the sample to foam.  Visine is a false negative
on the EMIT1 tests for benzodiazepines and marijuana.  The needed ratio of
Visine is 125 mL/L.

    You can substitute someone else's urine.  Gender and approximate age of
the sample can be detected, so take care when choosing a urine donor. Also
be sure to keep the sample between 91 and 97 degrees.  You may be required
to change into a gown.  A condom holding the sample and taped around the
thigh can be concealed under the gown.  Ask your urine donor what drugs
they've taken in the last month.  They may have taken a false positive, and
before the test, the tester may ask you to list everything you've taken.
If you don't trust your friends sample, you can get powdered urine from
Byrd Labs or Butterfield-Jay Foundation. This must be prepared ahead of
    Abbie Hoffman, author of "Stealing This Urine Test," suggested leaving
a few drops of urine on the seat or on your shoe for as "an added measure
of authenticity."

You Fail:
    If you fail the test, raise hell.  Failing the drug test has been known
to make a quiet person become tenacious.  You will be interviewed by a
medical review official (MRO), who would try to find out why you tested
positive.  Laura Gibson, a medical doctor on the internet, tested positive
and was not hired.  She had a poppy seed bagel that morning, not knowing it
was a false positive.  She fought it to the point where they just decided
to throw out the results and hire her anyway.  But don't go take it to
court.  It's virtually impossible to win this case.
    There is a usenet 'Just-Say-No-To-Piss-Tests Project' keeping an
updated list of companies that invade your privacy.  If you have first
person experience with a company, you can report it to .
They will provide bad publicity for the company by adding it to the list.
They also maintain a list of companies that respect your privacy, and you
can also add to that list.
    NORML operates a Drug Testing & Information Hotline.  The charge is
$2.95 per minute.  900/ 97-NORML

floating through the bandwidth, and most everyone chose to remain anonymous
anyway.  A majority of it is just compiled WWW text for alt.drugs,
condensed into the methodology of defeating the test.

(1)EMIT test: Enzyme Multiplied Immunoassay Technique
(2)RIA test: Radio ImmunoAssay
(3)GC/MS test: Gas Chromatography/ Mass Spectrometry (used in the military)