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Love and Acceptance
Cacti - T. pachanoi
Citation:   Jah Bless. "Love and Acceptance: An Experience with Cacti - T. pachanoi (exp99228)". Erowid.org. Jan 31, 2017. erowid.org/exp/99228

 
DOSE:
17 in oral Cacti - T. pachanoi (tea)
BODY WEIGHT: 60 kg
I have used San Pedro a few times before, mostly low dosage sessions. This particular time I went for what I would describe as a mid-high dosage level. I have grown San Pedro in my courtyard for some time
I have grown San Pedro in my courtyard for some time
, a fantastically easy plant to grow. Whenever any of the cactii started getting too big for their small pots, I would cut and replant. I had three such cuttings of 15 centimetres high in one pot, a pot probably too small for all three. One cutting was 8 centimetres wide, the other two were about 5 centimetres wide. All three had failed to really grow, although they had acquired roots. I decided the three would be used to ingest.

I silently said a small prayer to the plant gods as to why I was taking them. I de-spined and cut them into slices. I diced the slices, keeping only the dark green flesh and discarded the white parts. I then put them in a blender with water and hit go. The vivid green blended San Pedro was then placed in a pot with some more water. Low boiling then took place for roughly two hours. At this point, I strained the pulp and skin by using a piece of cloth over another pot. I squeezed as much as I could from the pulp before discarding. I then placed the liquid back onto the stove and recommenced low temperature boiling. After a half hour, I turned off the heat and let it cool - I find the excess slime rises to the top as a skin. Careful use of a spoon allows one to remove the slime and discard. I repeated this process. I was left with roughly 500mls of liquid.

I awoke the morning of ingestion at 6:30am and prayed to the plant spirits. I intimated that I was seeking a form of enlightment, that I was being as respectful as I could and asked them to treat me gently. I then drank the liquid in one go. Although bitter, I find my preparations are quite sufficient for as decent a taste as could be expected. Using my cool down method, to my mind, removes excess slime, and I would describe the liquid as a tan colour, like that of a good, cloudy ale. I did not expect to wake so early and knowing it takes some time for commencement of effects, I went back to bed and fell asleep for an hour. Upon waking, I instantly knew the effects were well on their way to beginning.

I might add at this point, that I'm a naturally very skinny guy who has a blazing fast metabolism. This is important for me in knowing why it affects me quicker than most descriptions I have read.

At first I was somewhat anxious and a little fearful. I was doing this alone, and I was scared that I'd had more than I had bargained for. I prayed again to the plant spirits to be gentle. I performed an occult ritual to banish any negativities.

Effects at this stage included the appearance of walls breathing and things like the pictures on my wall to start moving slightly. There were moments of mental 'drop outs' where I felt like my mind had shifted gears. There was a slight feeling of nausea, but nothing out of control. I firmly believe good preparation of the liquid is key for reducing those feelings. Closed eye visuals were taking place.

As is akin to my nature, I always closely study the clock so that I can allay any fears of the experience by telling myself that 'effects will peak at this time', 'things will taper roughly at this time' etc. As the clock began to get to three hours after take off time, I began to relax as I had a better knowledge of the strength of this trip.

I had not drank alcohol or smoked cannabis for two months prior to this trip. Three months prior to the trip, I had a long term relationship end which had made me sad and it was this that I wanted to concentrate on during the trip. I wanted to let go of my pain, and I told the plant spirits now working their way inside me of this. The results of this were fast acting. When I say that the plant spirits talk to me, I can only say this is both an intuitive feeling and sometimes an actual voice that responds to questions in my head. They brought me back to the fear and anxiety I had experienced in the three hour lead up time to the present time and asked gently if I could see any parallels. They pointed out that fear is my problem, and that it was this that I needed to let go of. By this point I began to break down and cry. I saw I did not want to fear anything, that life was too short and sacred for fear. Fear was holding me back. Fear of being alone again, also. I cried for perhaps 10 minutes. I would describe these tears as pure stress relief. These were not tears of pain. The 'mental conversation' between myself and the plant spirits continued for perhaps a half hour.
The 'mental conversation' between myself and the plant spirits continued for perhaps a half hour.
After, I felt like a great weight had been lifted and from this point on, the trip became serene and calm. I felt like the serious part of my learning had been achieved and now I could enjoy the trip!

I listened to positive music and closed my eyes, I felt my senses pulsate with the beat. I heard the layering in the different instruments more precisely than I could straight. I went out into my courtyard and looked at my cactii, I loved them. I looked up into the dazzling blue sky and felt the sun energising my body. I received waves and chills of physical delight in my body. After a sandwich and some green tea, I decided to stroll to the botanical gardens close to where I live. I took immense pleasure in the sun and clouds, the colours of the plants were astounding. I saw a dragonfly and marvelled at its flight. I saw children playing on the grass and felt one with the cycle of life. I saw morose emo teenagers being loud and boisterous, and felt the same thing.

I came home and chilled out. I felt great, and I kept pondering upon the plant spirits and how they could teach. At one point (and I have felt this with psilocybin mushrooms, too) I almost felt I was a cactus. It felt like the cactus was teaching me how it was to be like a cactus, and it felt paradoxically energetic and calm.

I wandered back into the city again to meet some friends. By this time, roughly eight hours had gone by and effects had definitely tapered. It took half an hour to reach my destination and upon greeting a friend, I was amazed at her eyes. Had her eyes always been such a beautiful combination of blue upon white? I made the decision not to tell my friends of my condition, I saw no point in trying to describe it. Soon the effects ebbed away.

All in all, it was a powerful and insightful experience. I would characterise the effects as being far more mental/emotional than visual. Or perhaps I decided to concentrate more upon those attributes. I will wait a respectful time between my next meeting with San Pedro. Next time when I pray before ingestion, I will promise not to fear.

Lesson learned: when communicating with the plant spirits, you *may* find yourself on a difficult path (granted for me, it was not this time) but that love and acceptance of the plant as well as everything in life is the key.

Thank you for reading, and may your plant guides bring you all that you desire.

Exp Year: 2013ExpID: 99228
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 40
Published: Jan 31, 2017Views: 3,362
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Cacti - T. pachanoi (64) : Alone (16), Entities / Beings (37), Nature / Outdoors (23), General (1)

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