Citation: Santos. "Is It Saving Me?: An Experience with Buprenorphine / Naloxone (Suboxone) (exp98302)". Erowid.org. Sep 6, 2019. erowid.org/exp/98302
Is Suboxone Saving Me?
I have been using opiates for thirteen years, mostly oxycodone. Though I haven't been able to use for the past year due to an involuntary vacation in the county jail for forging prescriptions, I know that it's only a matter of time before I pick up a regular habit again. I've already gotten percocets for a kidney stone. Since I'm on probation all may scripts have to be legal or else I could violate.
Although I've read discouraging reports of people using suboxone as a maintenance tool before a high tolerance develops, I decided that it might help me from relapsing. The doctor prescribed me 8mg 2x a day which I knew was a very high dose from my suboxone use in the past. Since my tolerance was low, I started off on 2mg 2x a day. I got the film so I cut it into pieces.
The first 4 or 5 days were not beneficial. I was slightly nauseous and had a kind've detached feeling that didn't make me care about anything. Prior to taking them I had only taken a few percocets and was taking about 8 50mg tramadol a day so there wasn't any kind of withdrawal that I had to go through, like I said, I am taking subs to prevent me from using oxycodone.
I am taking subs to prevent me from using oxycodone.
After about a week, the light went on and I started feeling happy and full of energy. I struggle with constant fatigue and suddenly realized that I didn't have to lay down and take a nap after the subs started working. There's a kind of anti-depressant effect along with the release of dopamine from the opiates which is rather pleasant. The nausea is gone and I have that motivation and energy that remains consistent throughout the day. I can also attest to the suppression of the cravings. I still have some percocets and have no desire to touch them after having taken a few and not having any effects whatsoever. I feel like a great burden has been lifted off my shoulders by not having to crave and obsess over having other opiates in my system. However I feel somewhat wary because I'm just not used to feeling happy and motivated all the time
I feel somewhat wary because I'm just not used to feeling happy and motivated all the time
and It feels like I'm cheating. I go to AA/NA and you have all these miserables who struggle with depression and unhappiness, working through it without any chemical assistance.
Hence the methadone/suboxone controversy. I just wouldn't want to stop taking Suboxone after having reached this plateau but coasting through my disabilities on auto-pilot seems a little unreal. I have a duel diagnosis of addiction and depression and Suboxone treats both which I find amazing.
For now I will accept this medicinal miracle and see where it leads me. Practically though, the subs are expensive and my insurance doesn't cover them. However when I am focused and feeling ok I can tap into money making capabilities and increase my income so I can afford to be depression/addiction free. Today, it's worth it!
COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.