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Terrified of Dying
DXM (with CPM)
by aneurysmpunk
Citation:   aneurysmpunk. "Terrified of Dying: An Experience with DXM (with CPM) (exp9653)". Aug 20, 2004.

T+ 0:00
12 tablets oral DXM (pill / tablet)
  T+ 0:59   oral Chlorpheniramine Maleate (pill / tablet)
  T+ 25:00 16 tablets oral DXM (pill / tablet)
  T+ 0:59   oral Chlorpheniramine Maleate (pill / tablet)


[Erowid Note: Coricidn Cough & Cold contains chlorpheniramine maleate which can be dangerous and/or fatal at high doses. This product should not be used as a source for recreational DXM.]

Just last weekend, I bought three boxes of Coricidin Cold & Cough. In the small town that I live in, we have a carnival type thing called the Fall Festival. It has a couple rides (which are the same every year), food stand, games (same every year also)'s not all that great, except EVERYONE goes...tokes up, gets drunk, and just has fun. About 7:00 PM, I took 12 Coricidin pills, and Stacey took the 5 that I had left from the package. We met up with some friends, Nick, J, Ben, & Twiggy. We all went into a restauraunt and we just sitting in the smoking section, smoking cigarettes and talking. I began to feel very hot, and my vision was kind of shaky. It was kicking in really strong, and it had only been 45 minutes to an hour. For some reason, whenever I take Triple C, it sometimes takes up to 2 hours to kick in. I had a really good trip that night, feeling really drunk, stoned, and I just had a great time stumbling around and being stupid.

The next day, we went up to the Fall Festival again, and at about 8:00 PM, I downed 16 Coricidin pills (a whole box...not sure how many MGs that is)...and Stacey took 10. Again, we went to the same restauraunt and we talking with some friends, Emily, Amanda, Curtis, and Megan, and within 15 minutes I felt like I was going blind. Everything kept fading in and out, sometimes into black, sometimes into white, sometimes into even orange and pink. I start to feel like I was going to puke..and I started sweating like a pig. Stacey later told me I was saying someone was burning my skin. I went outside and sat against the wall until Stacey finished eating.

I was tripping hardcore within 30 minutes. I couldn't walk, I had to put my arm around Stacey, and I still pretty much just dragged my feet. My heart was pounding in my chest, and it felt like it was shaking my whole body. Even my head was throbbing. My eyes were huge, and looked like they were about to pop out of my head. I turned a pale, sickly white color...and everyone commented on how I looked like shit, and looked really sick. I somehow convinced Stacey I wanted to ride the Octopus, so we waited in line.

When we got on the ride, I knew it was a mistake. I didn't feel like I was going to puke, I just had this tight, squeezing feeling throughout my whole body. And my heart was still pounding. The ride started going, and at first, it was really cool, because it seemed to me that the ride was going slow, and everything in the background was just a mixture of bright colors. Then I saw a bright light flash, at first it looked like a lightning bolt, but then it opened up like it was devouring the entire sky. And I felt like I was being pulled up to heaven. I could then see my family, the people I loved, and times I remembered from my life. I just remember feeling like my life was over, and I was crying. Not just crying. Screaming No, No, No! I didn't want to go, I just remember that feeling. It was like I could feel my body shutting down, I felt like a giant, living computer, and God had pressed my off button, and the screen was turning black.

It was nothing like I have ever felt before. It was extreme. I really imagined that I was holding on to my body, the little cart of the ride...trying to keep myself breathing...Telling God in my head that I didn't want to go...that it wasn't my time. I finally convinced God I HAD to stay, and the light faded away, and I was back, swinging around in circles, moving up and down, with Stacey next to me, cracking up at something. I stared straight ahead for the rest of the ride, not moving at all.

I was in shock for ten minutes after we got off the ride. Stacey was almost in tears worrying about me, trying to get me to snap out of it. I finally managed to say, 'God came for me...but I told him it wasn't my time.' In a weird, slurred voice. She got scared, and said she was taking me home. It was around nine then, and I convinced her that I was having fun, and wanted to stay. She practically carried me up to the water fountain so we could talk to all our pothead/druggy/sk8er/punk friends, because the fountain is where they all hang out. I sat on the steps, not talking at all. My heart was still pounding through my entire body, beating so hard it made my legs shake. It felt like I was having a seizure. A friend of mine, Dan, sat down next to me and told me I didn't look so good, and wondered what I was on. I told him, 'Coricidin.' In a low, devilish voice as he later tells me.

I was telling total strangers about my experience on the Octopus. The weird thing is, I didn't think it was real. None of it. I could see myself talking to all these people, like I was starring in a movie, or dreaming. I felt like I was another person, staring at this cracked-out blond girl with huge, brown eyes and a pale, sickly face. I started to get really bad, and paranoid. Every time I turned my head, I felt like my soul had been left behind. Like I was nothing but a pair of invisible eyes. It was so strange. I even had to tap Stacey on the shoulder a couple times and ask her if she could see me. Thats when she made me leave.

She carried me to a friend Eric's house, so I could lay down and rest. I don't remember any of the walk to Eric's. I stumbled inside and fell on his bed. Eric used to work at a hospital, so he checked my pulse and said it was way above normal. He told me I needed to settle down before my heart exploded. I was so terrified of dying. I laid still on his bed, other than my legs shaking, and heart pounding so hard and fast it trembled my entire body, I laid on his bed, staring straight ahead for three hours straight. I remember have a couple more minutes to live~your heart is giving out...right about...Eric and Stacey were watching something on TV and it had a countdown from 10 on it. When it got to one, I held my breath, expecting to see the white light again, but I didn't.

I knew that I had to hold on, settle down, and be strong. My legs finally stopped shaking after hours, and I was finally coming down. My vision was still really blurry, and I was afraid if I moved even the littlest bit, my heart would explode. It was the most terrifying experience of my life. I have the urge to do Coricidin again, but I never want to trip like that, ever, ever again.

Exp Year: 2001ExpID: 9653
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Aug 20, 2004Views: 52,219
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Chlorpheniramine Maleate (164), DXM (22) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Overdose (29), Bad Trips (6)

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