Citation: Mason. "What It Feels Like: An Experience with Heroin (exp96237)". Erowid.org. Dec 28, 2015. erowid.org/exp/96237
I've done heroin many, many times. I've smoked it and shot it intravenously but never at any time in my using career have I been physically addicted to the drug. I've overdosed once before and come close on many separate occasions. I'm what you may called a seasoned user, and I'm here to share two experiences. Both will be brief, relatively uninteresting, but brutally honest. I will tell you how to go about the process of smoking & shooting and what the effects are and how they feel. I'll be detailed in how it feels because that's the most common question I receive. I've plucked two of my most pleasurable experiences from my memory banks that I am about to share with you. Let us begin.
I can't tell you how many times I've indulged in smoking heroin, but if I was to take a rough estimate the number has to be in the triple-digits. Typically I buy a dub ($20) for myself and kill it in one to two sessions of continual smoking. Sometimes I'm alone sometimes I'm with friends. It all depends on the day really. On this day in particular I was alone. After picking up the dub I checked the contents of my tar (slang for heroin) to see if it was up to snuff. From the looks of it I had been slightly ripped off as the sack seemed to be slim in comparison to previous purchases. However, that wasn't about to stop me from getting high.
My most common practice of smoking heroin involves me pretending to take a shower so the running water drains out the sound of the foil and constant igniting lighter. I take a small sheet of foil, break off a tiny bit of my black, sticky heroin and set it on the aluminum. I briefly ignite the underbelly of the foil where the piece is located as this causes it to stick, eliminating worry that my precious drug may fall off in a flurry of fear should somebody attempt to enter the bathroom. I take a straw and fold it about 1/4th of the way down and burn off the smaller part. This smaller straw is known as a tudor. Then, with the foil slightly tilted to the side, straw in mouth I once more ignite the underbelly of the foil. A sizzling hiss confirms that the heroin is burning and I begin to inhale. I breathe in as much smoke through the tudor as I can and when I have as much smoke in my lungs as humanly possible I take an additional gasp of air to ensure it stays there. I hold it for as long as I can. Upon exhale you can clearly see thin (sometimes thick) smoke escape my body. The more smoke, the better the hit. The effects are immediate and vary in degrees of intensity. For me, a couple hits clears my head and rids myself of worry. As I continue to smoke more effects start to take hold; very intense feeling of raw pleasure, drowsiness, pleasant itchiness (sometimes it's nightmarish though) feeling of calmness, increased sociability, pure excitement, and intense relief from all stress. These are subtle to begin but the more you smoke the more enhanced they become.
Smoking offers the same high as shooting but on a much smaller scale. Shooting also has a few notable effects smoking doesn't offer, the most prominent being the initial rush. All in all smoking is ritualistic for me and I fall deeper in love every time. The high lasts for about an hour, sometimes two, but you'll continue to have what I call an 'afterglow' for the remainder of the day. The afterglow is essentially being under the influence of heroin without the pleasurable effects. The negative effects include sometimes becoming nauseous, unable to keep eyes open, and for me personally extreme agitation and hostility toward other. This in magnified throughout the comedown which is surprisingly gentle.
Considering the amount of time I spend talking about smoking heroin I'll dive right into intravenous use. Okay, first of all do not fuck around with needles if you don't know what you're doing. I'm not saying I entirely did when I first started off but it almost cost me my arm. There are a great deal of risks associated when it comes to shooting, so my nonchalant ideals should not be encouragement for any type of experimentation. That being said I'm not going to talk about the setup of shooting, it's too long and not at all necessary.
Once I find a vein and the plunger has been pulled back filling the needle with blood, that's when I (or if my friend is doing it for me) push the plunger back to the bottom. This is done at a very slow pace to ensure I don't lose the vein and shoot into my muscle. Once the heroin is in my blood there's about a 4-7 second gap of nothing. No high, no head change, nothing but some gnarly adrenaline if I'm nervous. Then the high hits. My head will suddenly become very heavy and I'll feel as if there's a tornado inside my brain. The body high starts at my feet and shoots sharply to my arms, the back of my neck, and throughout the rest of my body. At this point it's almost impossible to not say 'Ahh.'
I am literally overflowing with pleasure, to the point where I never want it to end. Imagine having an extremely bad itch & somebody scratching it right at that very moment. Now, magnify that feeling of relief by a thousand and you have a mild idea of what heroin is like. Not even a mild idea, that was a bad comparison. Oh well. All the effects are the same as smoking just a lot more powerful, especially the increased sociability. The high can last from a mere hour to over six. I've woke up still high before. It's a wonderful feeling.
Well, I hope this gave you some insight to what the 'hardest drug' in the world is. Heroin may not be a threat to somebody like me, but it's still a gamble. Every time I use I'm throwing the dice hoping I get snake eyes. Just because I'm not addicted doesn't mean it isn't bad for you.
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