Citation: C. "A Slip Into the Reflecting Pool: An Experience with Methoxetamine (exp95257)". Erowid.org. Jan 12, 2016. erowid.org/exp/95257
'A Slip Into the Reflecting Pool. A Word of Caution'
Forewarning. MXE should not be taken lightly at the higher doses. Proceed with extreme caution when treading the dark waters of MXE. 200 mg is an extremely high dose, I am experienced in other dissociatives and hallucinogens, and I did have a sitter check up on me once in a while. Do not do this alone and without preparation; both physically and mentally.
The pool is ready and so am I.
The bitter cold tiling under my feet bit me awake as I fumbled through my pants pocket in my bathroom. I’ve never enjoyed trying new dissociatives with friends and MXE was one of them. I dosed out my 200 mg of MXE and said goodbye to my next couple hours as I launched it up my nose. From this point on, the linear style of the story is no longer useful.
I saw my stark white body in the mirror.
“Hmm thats odd.”
I tilted my head.
“It doesn’t sting, and it doesn’t feel too much like ketamine.”
“Oh. There’s the ketamine.”
My field of vision began to alter and became more focal on the center of my field of vision, colors became crisper, sounds became more hollow, the air in the room escaped, my understanding of my location slowly was also disappearing.
“I should quickly get to the bed.”
“I should quickly get to the bed.”
Already my body felt like a mechanical mechanism working together to get my organic sack of a body to this “bed”, this square rectangular object in which I sleep in. This is the psychedelic part of MXE, slightly akin to Ketamine, but nowhere near as pronounced.
“This doesn’t seem too bad, is the come up really this long?”
“What's that noise?”
“I kind of like it.”
This incandescent of a buzz slowly picked up volume and speed as the approaching pool of water that was MXE was to engulf my mind, and body. Breathing became harder, more shallow, as if all the air in the room had been evaporated and replaced with an unknown liquid. It became colder, not in temperature, but color. It was as if all the human life had vanished along with the air, I was an alien on this floating rock.
My mind and body started tearing, communication between the two was being interrupted, like a bad connection to the television. The sensations were there, but not of this universe, they were unfamiliar, hostile. The static that was my central nervous system was loosing it’s grip on my body. I can’t breath; this “water” is seeping into my body.
The room transitioned into a more ominous feeling, not terrifying, but not soothing.
“Just remember to breath.”
My body takes a big heap of air, the next one larger, and larger.
“Is this an entity?”
“I don’t recall MXE inducing entities...”
It was gone. And my breathing had become less of an issue, I no longer worried. I no longer worried about “dying”.
At this point my body was no longer of use, it was simply a large sack of organic material sitting atop a larger collection of mountain like blankets, or even microscopic folds of dust; there was no sense of scale. There was no such thing as scale.
“Where am I?”
“Oh yea, I’m safe, don’t worry”
The bodily effects soon disappeared as it gave surrender to this powerful substance. It was no longer connected to my mind, it was no longer part of what makes “ME”.
I was in the reflecting pond: and it was in my body.
I wonder what's outside.
There are two fans on the ceiling now, that’s odd. Wait... No now it’s moving to the left. No... Now it’s moving into the ceiling. It looks so fuzzy, as if my vision had been desaturated and blurred. It looks as if the fan was being smeared left and right, leaving a trail of it’s original remnants.
I should write this.
What is this? It looks odd, somewhat like DXM. It looks like red static, however, with an emphasis on the center. It was spiraling in and out. But, not in my field of view but in and out past my mind.
This can’t be an entity, this is silly.
Where the hell am I? What year is it? I’m cold... Scared.
This land seems foreign to me. It is hostile, it does not know me, love me.
Why is everything so dark, so sterile, like a hospital bedside.
I should move on, it’s getting weird. I like it.
I followed him, I sprinted forward toward the center of the spiraling flock of small red static dots. As I ran closer, I picked up speed.
What is my body feeling? This is some fucked up shit. I feel my body’s energy being ripped toward this metaphysical collection of red dots.
I don’t like this. I need to get back to reality.
Nothing. My organic eyes no longer received valid information for me, I was blind, not by the eye, but by the mind.
“we are now melting”
I am terrified. What is happening to my body, my mind. I feel as if my mind is sinking past my body.
“we are disappearing and have also shattered”
This is getting a little too weird.
This is getting a little too weird.
I’m worried. Worried I might never wake up again.
Will I suffocate? What if I’m found dead like this.
“we have melted and have been disintegrated”
I am at peace. I am no longer worried of my physical self as it has completely disappeared. My body is silent.
-what are you doing-
Honestly, I’m not sure.
-what are YOU doing-
Exploring, I deserve some time for myself in my mind.
-I am disappointed-
-treat others with more respect-
I already do. I love everyone, I am patient, I am loving.
-it’s changed a little-
Do I always need to be perfect?
-not perfect, but loving to all-
Don’t I already???
-you still need to grow up, stop denying. See the hatred rising in you slowly-
I understand, I have been complaining more. But not too much...
-it doesn’t matter, love-
I’m not sure what that was about, I should definitely stop the complaining I’ve been doing recently. But what was that? Was that my ego? An entity? Who?
Where am I? I can't recall how I got here. It seems as if I'm floating through space, nothingness. I have no body, no sense of direction, time.
Maybe I can find another entity. (I spend an unknown amount of time 'floating in the abyss') This is useless, I must not seek divine entities but allow them to seek me.
I wonder what’s in this realm?
This odd thing, this light, it is familiar.
I remember this, I live here.
Wow I feel queasy, terrible in fact, like the worse hung over in my life.
I might just throw up, I don’t want to. Maybe I’ll feel better on my other side.
“we turn around”
“we fumble around”
“we are facing the other side of the bed”
I feel as if my mind and body have a slight disconnect, a latency between perceiving and receiving. I feel terrible.
“I am sore, I am tired”
“I need sleep”
I should really get to sleep, I wonder if I can. I’ll give it a shot.
I guess that was a one time thing.
I want to fall asleep. But I still feel so alien like, metallic, coarse. I am uncomfortable. It feels like I am nestled between a hard bed and hard mind. The two are very abrasive, they collide and slowly are crushing up against one another. These visuals are still here, confusing, extraterrestrial.
This was a lot more confusing, and terrifying than a K hole. It was almost like a stale mixture between a K hole and a 3rd Plateau DXM trip. I definitely don’t want this again. Ever.
I wonder if anyone else’s experience is like mine? I need to warn others about the power of this drug. But first I must rest.
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