Citation: Weltall. "The Right Headspace for Hard News: An Experience with 2C-C & 2C-D (exp95220)". Erowid.org. Oct 2, 2012. erowid.org/exp/95220
||(powder / crystals)
||(powder / crystals)
A little about me: I am a medium to heavy daily cannabis smoker (smoke as soon as I get home from work until I go to bed on weekdays, all day everyday on the weekends) in my early twenties that also dabbles in just about any hallucinogen or empathogen I come across. So far my life has presented opportunities to try lsd, mushrooms, mdma, methylone, mephedrone, dmt, 2c-b, 2c-i, 2c-c, 2c-e, 4-ho-met, and 5-meo-mipt. My supplier considers me a hardhead for these things; I generally require a dose that, on typical charts, falls into the “strong category” to experience more than a light buzz. I also occasionally chain-smoke while drinking or tripping, used to smoke about 2 packs a week but now smoke less than one pack in two months. I take no other substances, legal or otherwise.
As far as personality I am a bleeding heart hippy from a rougher urban background. The hardships of living with a meth addict father for a lot of my youth ingrained in me a general empathy for others and the belief that it’s very hard to dislike someone if you try to understand their motivations and life experiences. We all have reasons for the things we do.
I like to frame my use as an exploration of experiences. I have no 'favorite' substances and always look for ways to learn something new about the world and my relation too it from each journey. I also enjoy learning the caveats peculiar to each chemical at different doses.
This narrative is a little long, and very personal , so if you're not here for a narrative, skip down to the end for the summary of effects.
I had been having a rough week, my job for the last few days consisted of manual labor on top of having to explain ceramic techniques and ideas to a group of students. I was also battling a mild flu (fever, aches, general malaise and nose/throat problems). Friday rolled around and I decided that my body just couldn't take any more of this, my hands and arms were swollen with persistent muscle soreness and fleeting nerve pain while the headache I'd been cultivating all week just grew and grew. I called out and decided to dedicate the day to my personal wellbeing. If I'm not well my students suffer for it.
Around 4 pm I found myself in possession of a capsule containing 50 mgs of 2c-c and another containing 20 mgs of 2c-d. I had taken 2c-c two weekends before at 60 mgs and experienced a sense of content and wellbeing along with an intensification of colors and lights (that translates to “I stared at burning logs in my fireplace for 4 hours”). I had been curious about 2c-d's 'pharmacological tofu' effect and decided that if I was going to try combining PEAs that I should probably start with 2c-c since I found it to be the most gentle (in terms of body load, mindfuck and hangover effects).
I ate the two capsules along with a piece of candied ginger (for my poor tummy) on an empty stomach at about 6 pm while my roommate was cooking dinner and her and I were watching British period show called Downton Abby. Within about 20 minutes I felt that something was beginning to happen though I couldn't put my finger on the actual effects other than a slight, anxious uneasiness in my stomach and a gentle glow.
Around 7 pm it got a lot stronger. I decided that since it was apparent the chemicals had begun to seep into my blood stream that I should probably eat something. I had prepared a plate of crackers, light cheese, salami and olives before I dosed in anticipation of decreased dexterity later (good call on that one, I was uncoordinated from this point on until about 10 pm). The food tasted just fine and went down easy, what was different was the texture. I like the cheese I was eating but I had never experienced it melting from a fluffy solid to a delectable mush before. A similar revelation about the texture of wheat thins and the salinity of good olives followed.
It was at this point that my roommate headed upstairs to pack for the rest of her night in another part of the city and I was left alone laying on our couch with my cat and a blanket. The cat always seems to know when I'm in an altered state and responds by keeping me company and showing affection (normally he is rather violent and wild). I happened to be watching a pivotal episode of the show, many complicated and emotional plot threads were beginning to wrap themselves up, and there were deaths and revelations. The show seemed profoundly important and real, I felt myself invested in the characters as if they were my own family.
While I cared deeply about them, right about now is when things started melting. Faces, buildings, props, anything in the tv screen. Melted. If anyone managed to maintain their shape the shadows on their faces had a way of constantly ebbing and flowing back and forth. Images in the television also took on temporary 3-d qualities, objects freely shifted between the background, middle ground, and foreground occasionally breaking the fourth wall and floating through the screen.
Eventually (around 8 pm, as text messages indicate (texting error free was difficult but possible)) the show had ended, my roommate had left and my girlfriend had arrived. Some history about her and our relationship: She is a frequent drinker and cannabis does not seem to really affect her. She has taken 6-apb at a low dose and 2c-e (15 mgs) before. The 2c-e led to an extremely difficult evening for her and she does not desire to try anything else in the immediate future. Besides the constant pot smoking, she is generally ok with everything I choose to try and is excellent at keeping me company on my journeys. Two weeks before I had broken up with her and then last night we talked about everything that led to the breakup and sorted out our problems. We are back together and closer than ever before.
She is a photographer and the plan for the evening was to do a photo shoot about me, she quickly gave up on that plan since it was obvious I was in no state to do anything. By this time, I had very, very intense patterning on every conceivable surface in the room that breathed with me (and with the cat if I focused on him!) and I was euphoric but also mildly confused by everything. I felt like a baby in awe of how full the world is. She decided that it would be a very good idea to take me to my room and seduce me. We began to kiss and caress each other and it became apparent that sex would be especially enjoyable on this substance. While tactile sensations were mildly increased the real pleasure came from closing my eyes while next to her.
I was blessed with CEVs and spiraling thought patterns about all the lives we could have together in the future. We realized that we had absolutely no method of birth control in the house so she left to grab a box of condoms from the corner store (about a 10 minute trip).
At this time my second roommate came home. The situation is hard to describe in retrospect but the short version is that she was obviously angry and hurt by something and was going to lash out towards anyone and anything. In my delicate psychological state I decided it would be best to give her as much space as possible. I also resolved to fix the problem later; the substances definitely had a strong empathogen slant to them that blocked all the anger I would normally feel at the situation (having all that anger senselessly directed towards me) and made me want to understand the problem.
My girlfriend came back (we're around 8:40 now for those keeping track of such things) and noticed the new situation. After receiving several confusing texts from the angry roommate I left my girlfriend in my room while I went to the roommate to try and talk with her. Eventually the situation was resolved (she had had a rough day at school and a few minor issues in the house had sent her over the top) and I went back to my room and my love.
The empathogenic state I was in allowed me to sense something was bothering my girlfriend very deeply. It's only recently that she has begun to let me in to her inner world and to share these kind of secrets. After some serious prodding by me she revealed that she was pregnant. She also explained that she was not ready for a child and that she had had one abortion before. The entire conversation was very emotional as my most important long term goal is to raise a family and everything I do in life is in preparation for that. I'm also finishing up graduate school with a professional degree several years sooner than my peers and am for once in a position where I could provide for one. I decided that my love for her meant that I would do anything I could to provide her with all the emotional and physical support I could (something she did not have the first time she gave up a child and something my mother didn't have when she had me at a very young age) no matter how emotionally taxing it was on me (I was a sobbing wreck during parts of this conversation). The outpouring of emotions was cathartic.
She apologized profusely for telling me while I was tripping (I was still completely engrossed by the visuals but somehow managed to hold a lucid and important conversation) and I explained that this was the perfect time to tell me. The two chemicals put me in a completely open state of mind where I could accept difficult news like this. Around 11 pm I had come down enough to handle public transportation (visuals were mostly gone, some of the tangential thought patterns lingered) and we headed to her house (she was leaving for another city early the next morning and needed to leave from her house). We drifted off to sleep after talking all night around 1:30 am.
I ate a gel cap containing 50 mgs 2c-c and a second cap containing 20 mgs 2c-d after fasting all day. It took about an hour to come up and the peak effects lasted around five hours, I was asleep 7.5 hours later. I felt slight nausea the entire night (a sort of medium intensity anxiety that felt similar to stage fright) and a gentle increase in tactile pleasure. I experienced a range of open eye visuals from things melting to patterning and breathing patterns. Closed eye visuals consisted of swirling patterns of dots of colors on a black background with the occasional flash of realistic imagery shifting into psychedelic fantasyland. A sense of wellbeing, contentedness and mild euphoria permeated the entire evening even through deeply unsettling facts that were told to me by my girlfriend. The material allowed me to be more open and loving than I would normally be in difficult emotional situations with loved ones. I was physically uncoordinated and found tasks more complicated and walking to be dreadfully daunting.
The next day, as I write this after 6.5 hours of sleep, I feel slightly drowsy but completely mentally alert and able to engage in society. My body is still sore, I'm not sure if it is because I'm still mildly flu-ish or because I took powerful mind-altering substances the night before.
The mixture is definitely one I would love to try again on a warm, sunny day with good company. I know that I personally would not have been able to function in public before the point in the trip when I had to; even then I was still wobbly on my feet. Overall, it was a rough night and I’m glad for the relationships in my life.
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