Citation: Schizobus. "A Leap to the Future: An Experience with Lorazepam, Alcohol - Hard & Alcohol - Beer (exp94694)". Erowid.org. Mar 22, 2018. erowid.org/exp/94694
First, here's some background: I take and I am prescribed 60mg of Ziprasidone (Geodon) twice daily for a total of 120mg to combat my schizoaffective disorder. I am also prescribed 1mg tablets of Lorazepam (Ativan) to be taken as needed for anxiety, with a maximum prescribed dose of 1mg daily.
Last Friday night (January 27, 2012), like any other day, I took Ziprasidone twice, once in the morning at breakfast and once in the evening at dinner. Then, while sitting on my bed at home in my residence in the mid-evening and in the beginning of an effort to unwind after the week, I consumed a single blueberry ale beer, 12 fluid ounces (4.6% alcohol). I wasn't particularly anxious that evening but, seeking some sort of relief from the stresses of the week in the peaceful bliss of a benzodiazepine, I also consumed 2mg of Lorazepam, taking an extra milligram out of sheer recklessness. A brief time elapsed and, feeling nothing yet from the Lorazepam and beer, on an impulse, I decided I wanted to have some stronger alcohol for the night so I took the trip down from my room via the elevator, exited the residence building, and went to the corner of my block to the wine and spirits store for whiskey. The whiskey I wanted was selling at a discount so that buying a liter was cheaper than the smaller bottle of the same brand of whiskey so I bought the liter. Content with my purchase, I returned to my room. At this point I still felt nothing and was frustrated, expecting the Ativan take effect. Otherwise I expected nothing from the single beer I consumed. I had another bottle of the same beer, pouring it out into a cup, impatiently took another 2mg of Lorazepam, then returned to my bed to chat online with my girlfriend. Upon finishing the second beer, I poured and sipped approximately 150ml whiskey (40% alcohol) in the same cup that I had used for the beer. I hardly felt drunk and seemingly felt nothing from the Ativan but, looking back, one characteristic of the experience is most clear: My memory was growing sparse and failing. I was blacking out. I vaguely recall finishing the cup of whiskey while chatting on the computer but then I last recall that I soon uncharacteristically regurgitated the whiskey back into the cup and disposed of the vomit in my bathroom sink. Next thing I know, I am awake under the covers in my bed in the morning, undressed down to my boxers.
I did some detective work the next day and found out what happened later that night. Fortunately, I was chatting and, despite being unable to recall it, also eventually talking on the phone with my girlfriend throughout the experience. She informed me that after regurgitating my first cup of whiskey I became concerned that I had regurgitated Ativan too, so I consumed another 2mg of Ativan, making my total dosage of Ativan for the night a maximum of 6mg. In the morning, I noticed my pants and underwear were in my laundry hamper but, mysteriously, there was an extra set of pants and underwear there too. According to my girlfriend, I lost control of my bladder twice in my memoryless stupor and changed clothes as a result, meanwhile depositing the two batches of soiled clothes in the hamper. I also awoke to find a small bit of whiskey remaining in the cup near my bed, approximately 100ml, but I noticed that at least 300ml had been poured from the bottle since I poured the first 150ml, so I must have consumed at least another 200ml more whiskey upon blacking out. To top it off, my roommate greeted me in the morning and informed me that, although I was asleep when he returned to the room during the night, the bathroom was covered in vomit, which he cleaned up. I even got vomit on my roommate's towel which, since I own an extra clean towel, was immediately replaced and washed.
I seldom have trouble holding my liquor but the combination that night certainly proved too much for me and, in slightly different circumstances (such as driving or wandering about in public), the combination could have been extremely dangerous or a severe compromise of safety.
the combination could have been extremely dangerous or a severe compromise of safety.
I am grateful that I somehow remained confined to my room, that I remained in contact with my girlfriend, that my roommate cleaned and is forgiving, and I am especially grateful that I didn't choke on my own vomit that night in my sleep or perhaps something worse. The authorities, be they police or landlord, and medical personnel did not intervene. I have encountered tough experiences from various substances but this experience stands out because, at worst, I don't remember most of it and, given the lack of consequences, the experience acquires some sort of deceptive subtlety as though nothing had actually happened at all.
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