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The Destruction of Someone I Love
GBL, Alcohol & Diphenhydramine
Citation:   JasonV. "The Destruction of Someone I Love: An Experience with GBL, Alcohol & Diphenhydramine (exp93325)". Erowid.org. Oct 16, 2020. erowid.org/exp/93325

 
DOSE:
  repeated oral Alcohol - Hard
    repeated oral Diphenhydramine
      GBL
BODY WEIGHT: 250 lb
I've had an issue with GBL for years. When used recreationally, this drug is better than ecstasy, I swear. The coming down when I've been on it 24/7 for at least two weeks is where it gets me

My wife and I had been all over it and finally decided to come off, not for the first time, so we made all the necessary preperations. I stocked up on a bottle of 100 50mg Unisom pills, a gallon of vodka, and V8 for mixer, you know, for nutrients. I was hoping, with judicial application of the vodka and the pills, I would be able to at least stop shaking, if not sleep a little at least. I did sleep. A little.

We would go to bed, and every time I woke up, I would take a drink out of the cup next to the bed, as big of one as I could take, and go back to sleep. When the drink was emptied, I would take it to the kitchen and pour another while I downed another handful of pills.

The next time I really clearly remember what happened was waking up Wednesday morning feeling not great, but not as miserable as I was expecting, and going wow, that was a really long night, but way better than I expected. My face was all sticky with sweat and I was pretty scruffy but I didn't think twice about it. Yet.

I come into the living room, and my wife is sitting here watching TV with the hint of a traumatized look on her face. Whenever I black out with others around, I just pray to god I didn't do anything I'm going to be disgusted by, and for a while it didn't seem like it. I definitely felt a little woozy, and went to check the computer and see what had happened overnight, but immediately I was confused. It said the date was Wednesday morning. How could that be? I just went to bed Monday night!

I lost an entire day.

This is what I did:
- Turned a cooking pan on high so I could make food, then promptly forgot about it until my wife asked what I was doing. Told her I was cooking, duh, and looked at her like she was an idiot. Fortunately, she turned it off.
- Accompanied her driving to our storage space to get our stash of GBL because it became obvious that we would need it. I was violently shaking this whole time, but that didn't stop me from trying to light up the end of a leather glove and smoke it like a cigarette.
- Once we get to the storage space, I walk in and immediately have no idea the stash is within arm's length. I hid it from her, and she hid the key from me, so we have to be together to get it out. Cunning plan, no? Not when the one who knows where it is has a 3 second attention span. Finally, she screamed at me, and I looked at her like she was a retard, then pulled the bottle out of the duffel bag.
- Filled a half full vodka bottle with nasty orange drink, thus preventing it from ever being used for anything but screwdrivers.
- Throughout this entire day, I'm getting up, trying to burn stuff, going back to 'sleep,' getting up, falling 'asleep' on the couch, getting up, and so on. The only main constant of the day was that I spent a lot of time cutting my wife right where it hurts. I know her weaknesses, I know what to say to hurt her the most, and apparently that was what I wanted to do. I don't know why.

Somehow, the house did not burn down, my wife did not leave me, amazingly, though she indicated my presence for a week or so was not necessary. Irresponsible GBL use is the culprit for this as well as my own dumb ass and I will repeat this experience over my dead body.

Exp Year: 2011ExpID: 93325
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 25
Published: Oct 16, 2020Views: 1,124
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GBL (89), Alcohol - Hard (198) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Multi-Day Experience (13), Hangover / Days After (46), Addiction & Habituation (10)

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