Citation: Metatron. "Chemical Shamanism: An Experience with 4-AcO-DiPT & Methoxetamine (exp93152)". Erowid.org. Jan 23, 2012. erowid.org/exp/93152
The Breakthrough on Bottle Hill,
This order was our largest yet, and many of these things we had yet to try. The first experiment took place on the campgrounds involving J, MM and myself. We headed down to the city to pickup J after work. Racing against the setting sun, we made it up to the site, started a fire, and put the tents up by 7pm. After eating a rushed supper of olive pizza we took to our initial dose. For the three of us the first stage of this two stage rocket was a moderate to strong dose of the 4-aco-dipt, 15 mg for J, 25 for MM and 30 for myself.
This substance turns out to replicate the effects of MDMA through a mushroom like tryptamine. A strong euphoria took us over and everything gained a warm glow. Open eyed visuals were not intense at this point but patterns of thought became altered and the atmosphere of one's field of vision took on mythical characteristics. The star filled sky became interconnected in a web of light, woven together to resemble the head of medusa holding the universe together with her snakes reaching into every direction but never touching the horizon.
Hours passed and midnight was not far off, it was time to introduce the second stage. I was the one who manned the camp gun this night as R and M were not with us and MM and J were not as comfortable with loaded firearms as the former. We have a moderate issue time and time again with coyote/wolf hybrids that harass us even with gunfire in return. I feared the methoxetamine as a dissociative would prevent the body, mind and senses from being able to take action in case we were being charged by them again. Although it cannot be advised to others, I have come to find that less than extreme high doses of mushroom analogs do not impair me in a way to dissuade the use of a firearm in absolute cases of self defense.
Methoxetamine doses of 20 mg's were given to MM and J while I redosed another 30 mg's of the 4-aco-dipt. Things were beginning to grow more and more alien, though at this point I had no idea what the combination of substances was doing to J and MM. Soon however I too would discover what was beginning to take form this night.
The redosing intensified the characteristics of this material, greater open eye visuals came in and rather than simply an MDMA rush with some tracers, things were starting to enter the natural trip. A state where all parts of the environment gain a new dimension to them, this perception of the world could have one believe that all living things around oneself are sentient in a way beyond consciousness. Billions if not trillions of beings moving all around us, viewing us as asleep, while we view them as unaware of their existence, quite an irony. This train of thought lead my eyes to the trees, where the wind pushed the leaves back and forth high above the fire. As I stared up, the patterns of the leaf's movements took on more and more of a pattern, not unlike a hydra pushing out and pulling in its tentacles against or with some ocean current. The patterns became more and more of a pulling motion from above, as if these branches and their leaves were on strings like puppets with so many unique motions involved so as to mimmic the the wind to the untrained eye.
Above these branches I began to see humanoid figures without details of an actual person, just black forms moving in the trees. These characters were pulling on the strings which we usually see as wind, and they began to notice that I had picked up on their actions. The longer I stared at this process, the more attention it drew from these beings, until I started to feel myself lift up toward them. At this point MM, seeing the expression of sheer surprise and disconnection in my face, called my named softly. The spectrum of sensory intake from deep otherworldly hallucinations to an actual sound bearing my name shocked me back to the ground and I let out a started yell which caused an uproar of laughter for some time after. This was however, only the tip of the iceberg.
As expected the canine pack woke up and engaged in their sylvan adventures throughout the night. The timing is foggy but at some point the pack decided to get close out of interest. They came near enough where I yelled toward them and following a brief silence an individual or two would howl back. This went back and for a few minutes until they began to creep closer while making a unifying pack howl in an attempt to challenge our hold on the camp. The combination of an apex predator with a scavenger's brazenness too often leads to this situation where multiple shots in their direction are needed to send them running back into the forest. We've spoken of having to cull a portion of the pack to remedy the issue, but in all honesty we just respect them too much and would rather engage in nocturnal diplomacy, albeit backed with a gun.
As the hours progressed toward 3 am, it was time to redose the methoxetamine for MM and J. I was amazed that they hadn't wanted to do so hours earlier, but they said that the combination of substances had made things really intense and different than anything experienced before. They only wanted to do small doses to maintain the current level of effect, so afterward there was an unexpected 25 mg's that nobody else wanted to do. At this hour of the night the canine pack is beyond its frenzy of early night exploration and we had heard nothing in our area for hours. With this in mind and with my trip partner's blessings, I took the remaining methoxetamine and waited to experience what J and MM had been describing as this interesting new state.
The tryptatmine had been receding in me for a little while now when I began to feel a new sensation developing in my mind. The depths of the 4-aco-dipt gained a new monumentism and timelessness. Everything gained a grey hue as if being reformed into marble and I felt a slight weakness in the ability to control my body. There was a certain degree of concern as I leaned back and was forced to relax by dissociative powers. Time was slowing down and the timeless elements of reality were overpowering the temporal ones. We were exploring our souls with the aide of forbidden tools. All throughout time people have performed this skill, initially as shamans, oracles and witch doctors, then as witches and heretics. The burning at the stake for one's sin had been replaced over time with modern incarceration. Mountains of legal fees would then follow, meant to degrade one's quality of life so as to pay penance for the crime committed against society. Time had changed things very little it seemed, only the surface or skin of our collective practices. The most superficial appearance of draconian thought control adapting its camouflage to fit modernity's eyes.
The three of us then realized the eternal principle that we were coming to represent on this night. We were the contemporary voyagers and seers. Moving beyond the accepted ring of normal thought and into formless and timeless energies that only a few have had the drive to meet in any generation. The fire began to morph outward as it broke apart into a rotating star that seemed to stretch for hundreds of feet. It were as if we were collectively in a dream, envisioning the campsite expanding to the size of a monumental temple in the forest. We all stood up and made a triangle around the fire. The energy of our past influences were as close to us as ever. The forces that past lives had stirred and the ancestral blood in our veins united with a rare state of self awareness that freed us from our waking sleep. This was something beyond substance use, this was animism, shamanism and witchcraft fused with a modern knowledge of chemistry and psychoanalysis. We were delving deep into the collective unconsciousness while being so far removed from it at the same time that we were like satellites floating in psychic space apart from time bound physical reality.
As the hour of the wolf approached, normal time and our mindsets continued to detach until a point came where I felt a complete departure from the waking world. At that moment I said, 'there is a tunnel forming right now, here, with all of us'. It was at this point that we ceased functioning as people bound to earthly existence. J rose up and proceeded to her pouch of special parcels. In life, she has this pouch as a storage vessel for esoteric relics, and at certain appropriate times, brings it out for the items special representation and usage. MM likewise keeps such a storage area for such tools and memories collected throughout life, and upon mentioning this commonality both their faces began to morph. J became a genderless but massively boned character, proportions grew and hair vanished until I saw a hidden being that was for the first time showing itself. This character said nothing but held on with such strength that it was truly all I could see when looking at her for a time. Through the expression it gave to me, I could deduce that this was an archetypal being which was founded in her family both physically and psychologically. I could see the unconscious fusion between her and her siblings into one presence that perhaps would similarly manifest if induced in her brothers.
MM likewise transformed in robusticity and genderlessness but took on the form of a northern seafarer as her inner representative and ancestral link. Through her eyes I could see the depth and intensity of her thoughts as she stared into the fire. The length of her face and strength of her nose acted in tandem with her eyes to expose her destiny. It was as if this was the center of the world, and for this journeyer, the quest's goal was being met with seriousness and ultimate satisfaction. I could see the direct link of her father's passing with her acquiring of the land we stood on. His death as a catalyst, the body being exchanged into money, compensation in the modern and material world, to be exchanged again into this land where his energy and life's deeds would reside through the acts of his daughter. We loved him very much, and cared for him until his final moment with his body. I cannot think of a scenario he would have preferred more than to know that his untimely passing would also create the resource for his child to make a home for herself.
The strength of this area's natural energy and geologic activity is plain to see, on explorative substances or without. This night the message was far clearer and in greater intensity however. The earth's surface has many outlets for the forces within it. Fault lines, volcanoes, fissures, springs and other geological features which give these spaces particular affinities due to material and energy being released from the interior of the earth. Oracles in antiquity were said to reside near caves and springs, in many cases listening to the depths of the earth for something that would provide widely unseen knowledge about the workings of the world and fate. The centers of empire were often located near areas of strong geological activity as well. The lure of hot springs became the hot baths of antiquity's cities and Charlemagne himself chose Aachen as the center of his kingdom due to the area's number of hot springs which the Romans had earlier made into baths for their own benefit.
These locations of geologic activity and human interaction are the earth's hearts of humanity, which have along with individual consciousness, guided some aspect of human history. Weather divinely derived or imaginatively conceived, the prophecy of the oracle was something to be taken seriously if not at the very least taken into account for all matters involved. The energy of the earth which heated the desirable springs helped lay down the boundaries as to where leaders would stake a place for their centers and move outward from. Humanity and the earth are inherently linked, not just by the oxygen we breath or food and water we consume, but also by the earth itself as a geologic entity. Throughout time, certain knowledge arose from trial, which attempted to construct a system of more direct communication with the earth itself. In antiquity this was associated with prophecy and the interconnectedness with the divine that the oracle possessed. With the rise of the monotheistic god in the human psyche however, this knowledge was forced into secrecy under threat of death for heresy. Things independent of man and their master mold god were of no benefit to the new order of thought, other spiritual knowledge was systematically erased or forced underground.
This entire realization became our new environment, and we were self ordained psychic beings in a sleeping world, literally and figuratively. The star of fire swirled slowly as I saw celestial bodies representing different groups of man fight one another for dominance in the future. The star of palestine was growing while Israel waned, two ancient juggernauts resurfacing to continue the battle of east vs west in Eurasia. The fate of the crusader states would soon welcome the current state of Israel to their common graveyard in Palestine. The earth itself was telling of great change. UN statehood applications against the might of zionist interests, unprecedented unrest in the cities of the west, just the tip of the iceberg for the massive forces beneath the surface which come ever nearer. We were being previewed to events about to unfold and happening in other parts of the world. Coincidentally, this night also fell on the first day of the Occupy Wall St protests, September 17th 2011.
Outside of our experiences, time had progressed to where the sun began to make it's first visible sign on a hillside to the east. Our bodies were growing weary and the highest peak of our night was behind us. We walked out into a field away from the fire. It was very cool for this time of year so we bundled in blankets to smoke a bowl beneath the moon and stars. As we stood there passing the bowl, we witnessed the evaporation of the night sky as the sun's intensity grew stronger. Black went to hues of grey and blue, then green. Finally the golden light of the sun broke over the hill top, and the dawn of a new day had unfolded right before our eyes. We were returning to the world, after having stepped out between the last day and this one. We could not believe what had happened to us. MM prepared a bed time or morning tea aimed to remove toxins and purify the body. We were raw and exhausted by this point. Down the tea went and us along with it, nestled in our tent. It was a beautiful day unfolding, but we were going to need the first half of it to recuperate.
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