A Love Tragedy...
Citation: Gab. "A Love Tragedy...: An Experience with Methylone & MDMA (exp92193)". Erowid.org. Mar 23, 2018. erowid.org/exp/92193
The dose described in this report is very high, potentially beyond Erowid's 'heavy' range, and could pose serious health risks or result in unwanted, extreme effects. Sometimes extremely high doses reported are errors rather than actual doses used.]
Hi friends, this will be my first reports about my first experience with methylone. Please forgive me, I have a hard time writting english since I'm french. I will try to keep it short as I can.
THIS IS A TRAINWRECK DISASTER ABOUT MDMA, YOU CAN PASS IF YOU WILL. METHYLONE FOLLOW.
When I first encounter mdma last fall, my life was not like I was hoping for and I was in a mid-twenty crisys. I discovered it alone, and I keep it that way. I love to simply think about life, people and anything while I'm listening to great ' deep slow trance' . That way, I can be in a total state of relaxation. Just because I love to share music, go listen this tune, its sooo sooo great (on youtube) : Sander van Doorn pres. Purple Haze feat. Colin Janz - Timezone . So there I began this little story about a guy like many other guy, who fall in mdma when ther live is not going on the right path.
I was and I am, an active guy. I truly love going to the gym trying to surpass myself each time. Its an never-ending combat and it make me feel good, give me self-confidence, and help me keeping myself positive and happy . I have taken amphetamine 4-5 time in my life, I dont smoke weed, and dont drink alcohol too much. So, I was in a crysis about my life last fall, and I discovered mdma. I was totally amazed and fascinated by the experience. I thought, at the beginning that I will never be sad and depressive anymore. I though that my life will be ok and full of beautifull experience. So I began very very shortly to be an heavy user. I was in love with ecstasy. She (mdma) was my 'immaterial' girlfriend, I was truly in love with her. So since I was taking huge amount of E, the beauty faded away after 2 weeks. I know, if I have taken a break, the magic would have return, but I was compulsive and this addiction began to be very invasive in my thought. My life was all about earning money, buy E and 'try' to trip alone. In this period of heavy consumption, four months, the longest break I have taken was four days. I'm a machinist in a machine shop, working as a 'mold builder' . I'm working 4 days in a week and 10 hour per days. As a real 'genius' like I where at this time, I was 'tripping' 3 days in a row and I was trying to keep myself alive and rest a bit during my 4 days period of work. I was most of the time unsuccessfull to trip. I was eating 15 pills in like 1 hour and in some case; eating pills, puke, eat pills again, puke, and eating even more pills. Taking ecstasy during these time was just leaving me awake, alone with my thought who where gradualy more and more 'fucked up' as the time goes bye. I have been able to succesfully trigger an depression. I was sad, unhappy, hopeless, unhealthy, solitary, tired. I was always on a ' emotional rollercoaster'. One day, at work, I was crying for no reason in front of my 'cnc milling machine'. I was trying to talk and socialized the minimum with my other teammate. I was always deeply tired and was having ;strong,heavy, disturbing and scary sleep disorder. A kind of 'sleep paralysis' ; it was a nightmare trying to fall asleep and when I was working, drowsy as usual, many many times, I have lost the control of my body, hearing freaking buzzing sound at the same time, letting fall anything I was having in my hand. It was axactly this: my body and my mind where disconnecting each other without any warning exept the buzzing sound. After experiencing the worse I where able to stop. Starting to go train at the gym again an take care of my life. Maybe If I where following this path like that without stop, at this time, I'm probably sure that I will have lost myself.
I still love E but I know for sure that 'she' can be very harmful, IF ABUSE, taking down my mind part after part after part, silently, while I didn't even don't know that my personality was changing.
THE PART ABOUT METHYLONE.
I miss mdma every day. I try to trip just one time every 3 or 4 months. I really have a hard time finding real E these days and I don't like all the 'pusher-vendor' kind of things. When I find out about methylone. I buyed 1g and after a good day of work I have decided to try it. I have tried to reach a +++ on shulgin scale, but even with a great amout, 475mg roughly taken during 2 or 2.5 hours, I find out that it can't give you a +++, a good ++ for sure, but never the amazing journey of mdma. But it was pleasant too. The sens of touch and hearing was less powerfull than mdma. I was feeling less stoned, a little, enough clear minded to do something useful. In the peak of the trip, I was having a great feeling of relaxation and peace. It felt good. For me, it can be a temporary substitute for mdma. Methylone feel soft, gentle, calm, relax, peacefull. I did not have stomach pain and where able to eat a little during the trip. The trip itself is not very long. For me, because I have taken many 'bump' dose, it have been a 3h trip. When the effect fade away, I was feeling tired, but since I have gone to the gym and work 10 hours before, its logic. I'm not depress but sad that the trip was this short, and sad that I have not meet my 'immaterial' girlfriend ( ecstasy). I have a mild fuzzy head feeling but since I have take 475mg, it's normal. I know, after a big E trip, and some sleep, I have a kind of feeling in the head, its the same with methylone. Overal, the trip was fun, not intense like mdma but ok. I think that 200 to 250mg where be the right amount for me. Taking 250mg up to 475mg does nothing and just increase the body load .I will surely retry in 3-4 month if I'm not able to find mdma.
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