DOSE: T+ 0:00	25 mg	insufflated	MDMA
T+ 0:40	50 mg	oral	MDMA	(capsule)
T+ 0:00	117 mg	IM	Paliperidone
T+ 0:00	repeated	smoked	Tobacco - Cigarettes
T+ 0:00	repeated	smoked	Cannabis

BODY WEIGHT:

160 lb

I was initially hesitant to take Molly (MDMA, crystal powder). This was both because I have recently experienced chest pains due to snorting bath salts and because I am on a 117 mg dose of Sustenna consta shot per month (for schizophrenia). Yet, feeling better and curious when I was presented the opportunity to buy Molly from a girl that sold me weed, I bought a less-than-average amount (about 75 mg for $15).

At 6:30 pm on a rainy May evening I smoked a little weed to help put in perspective whether I should take the Molly. Usually weed makes me think twice about things, but this night I felt impulsive so I snorted 25 mg Molly at 6:45 pm. It stung a little and energized me slightly. After smoking a cigarette, I wrote and recorded a song using my electric guitar, microphone, and digital 8 track. Then I googled Molly and read an enthusiastic post, so I swallowed a capsule containing another 50 mg of Molly at 7:25. Immediately after, I read a post saying that a girl died on a small amount of the substance, so I felt regret. At this point, it had not yet had much effect, and I sort of hoped that it wouldn't work (like two supposed LSD tabs I bought earlier in the year). I went outside and played with my dog, ran into a neighbor and listened to some music. At about 8:30 I smoked a cigarette until it made me puke a little, hoping that I'd find the capsule in it. I didn't and started to feel something mentally numb. Usually I spend a lot of time feeling surges of surprise at existence, mental sensitivity to the presence of reality. But so far I had felt slightly anxious and was no longer energized. So at this point I watched a little tv and petted my dog.

At about 9:30 I suddenly felt acutely aware of sheer existence, of my strange assorted cells and organs and of my tenuous life in this incomparable realm of reality. I felt a little nervous about becoming too existential and having a brain problem, and I was having a little chest pain. So at 10:30 I decided to write about my somewhat paranoid Molly trip in case I died. While writing, I feel slightly euphoric and my tongue tingles, though the effects also seem to be waning. I don't look forward to falling asleep, since I've been having uncomfortable hypnogogia (irrational sequences of dream-like thoughts) while falling asleep. Also, my fears have been heightened since I'm afraid of brain damage caused by the brain-altering, image and language-producing microchip implanted by police (I have been undergoing abuse by this police apparatus for 2 years, since taking a sleeping pill during a sleeping test).

At 11:00 I smoked a ton of weed and felt great, again. Then I had the realization that drugs affect every body differently, depending on many individual factors such as disposition and health.

Exp Year: 2011	ExpID: 91019
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 26
Published: Jun 30, 2021	Views: 842
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
MDMA (3) : First Times (2), Combinations (3), Unknown Context (20)