DOSE: T+ 0:00	35 mg	smoked	DMT	(powder / crystals)
T+ 0:00		smoked	Cannabis	(plant material)
T+ 0:45	100 mg	smoked	DMT	(powder / crystals)
T+ 0:45		smoked	Cannabis	(plant material)

BODY WEIGHT:

190 lb

[Erowid Note: The dose described in this report is very high, potentially beyond Erowid's 'heavy' range, and could pose serious health risks or result in unwanted, extreme effects. Sometimes extremely high doses reported are errors rather than actual doses used.]
I've had experiences with this drug in the past, with it taking me on crazy journeys, but nothing that I have ever done in my life compares to this time.

22:00 smoke approx 35 mg dose on top of some marijuana. Usual humming, rushing sensation, and into DMT land. Drug-music on the stereo, tribal sounds, stuff like that..very pleasant. However I get the feeling the music dictates too much of the trip, and my friend and I decide to take another trip and increase the dosage.

22:45 by this time we've cooled off, turned off most of the electronics, and have some candles lit. I decide to make it a point to really reach into an introspective, undisturbed, meditative state. A huge pile of crystals (approx 100mg) are loaded on top of a small amount of marijuana and it's all packed down. I begin lightly heating the bowl from all sides, warming it up as the crystals begin to melt and I slowly inhale. Repeating the process a few times before it really begins to sizzle and I take deep inhales holding it in long as I'm lying on the couch. Time begins to collapse between tokes, I keep pushing myself wanting to be sure to get a heavy dose. The world collapses around the pipe and flame in front of my face.

At this point I close my eyes and begin to 'ride out' the experience, like I've heard of most people doing. Only, there was nothing.

A complete void of space, only layers of patterns. I could not find one comforting thought...nothing about my life, my beliefs, my memories...nothing mattered here. I had entered a void where there was no me or anything I thought I knew. This was extremely intense, and I have lots of experience with other psychedelics.

I made a horrible mistake and opened my eyes. The world literally re-materialized before my eyes, except everything was in a state of total and complete disarray and confusion.

I close my eyes again and search for that comforting something...nothing but patterns and color.

Open eyes...insanity. My hands look like wavy silhouettes of themselves. At this point I still can not grasp anything. My friend seems to think I was fighting and that I wasn't 'letting go' however I insist that the experience was so intense it left me with no choices. I entered the experience as me, then there was no me but I felt connected to a vast space, then I had to fight my way back to reality. I sat paralyzed until I could finally call out my friends name just to know he was still there (he was on another couch in the room) and stammer the words 'everything is blown apart' referring to my visual reality and sense of self.

Once I came out the tunnel on the other side, my ego still had to wrestle with this void behind reality.

What I realized is that although I felt like I knew myself going into the experience and was comfortable with my beliefs, that this is a completely SPIRITUAL experience and if you're not aware of that you might end up where I was...my ego had died and all that was left was my spirit. Which left me thinking that aside from trying to find my self I should be getting in touch with that abstract spirit part. Because it has nothing to do with my name, memories, or anything like that.

I felt like I could not possibly hope to go any further after this experience, with any substance whatsoever.

Exp Year: 2011	ExpID: 90303
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 24
Published: May 3, 2021	Views: 481
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DMT (18) : Small Group (2-9) (17), General (1)