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I Thought I Was Dying
DXM
by CCSky
Citation:   CCSky. "I Thought I Was Dying: An Experience with DXM (exp8998)". Erowid.org. Feb 3, 2011. erowid.org/exp/8998

 
DOSE:
180 mg oral DXM (gel tab)

BODY WEIGHT: 105 lb


Last night I had one of the worst trips of my life. Between 8 and 9 pm, I took 6 DexAlone Cough Caps, each containing 30 mg of dextromethorphan hydrobromide. I'd had them special-ordered from a Longs in my area. I took the first few pills with my dinner.

I began to feel a bit light-headed after I took them, but I still managed to take a shower successfully. After I got out of the shower, I took the last 3 pills or so and went downstairs and lied on my couch, waiting for the pills to hit. By 9:30, I could hardly walk in a straight line, which was bad because my mom had not yet left for work. By 9:45, I was so dizzy and fucked up that I had to hide in my room until my mom left at 10 o'clock--my sister had to cover for me.

Every time I tried to walk, I felt so nauseated that I had to lie back down. At 10, I attempted to go back downstairs so that I would not be alone to wither away. If the railings had not been there to support me, I would have fallen down the stairs. I called out to my sister to have her help me down the last few stairs and went back to the couch. However, by 10:20, I was feeling so sick that I had to hover over the toilet in the bathroom. In a panic, I called my friend in SoCal (I live in NorCal) who had taken care of many of her friends when they had accidentally taken DXM thinking that it was E. My sister was very worried at this point because my face and eyes were red and I was shaking furiously and slurring my speech. I dry-heaved until I finally managed to throw up a little around 11:15. I curled up in the fetal position on the floor of the bathroom thinking that I was going to die. I could feel myself being poisoned out of reality and I could feel my body starting to shut-down. My breathing was greatly depressed and I warned my sister to not let me stop breathing. I began to feel dissociated from my body. It took me awhile to realize that I'd been crying because I was so scared.

My friend kept reassuring me that I wouldn't die because I hadn't taken a fatal dose, while my sister kept bringing me water (I sent her upstairs to get online and go find out how long the trip would last too). For the first time in my life, I was truly frightened that I would die and I abandoned all pretensions that the concept of death didn't bother me. I realized that I would rather continue living my boring life than die, and realized that my family needed me.

At around midnight, I hung up with my friend and returned to the couch, bringing the trash can with me. My vision was splitting into double or triple vision. My sister returned upstairs for awhile to consult her DXM-dealing friend online to figure out what to do with me. I had her play music on the computer for me--it sounded very distorted---kinda like unfinished, slower non-studio versions. Time was also passing very slowly. When I closed my eyes, I was watching myself go through life, and I managed to truly realize that I'm no more important than anyone else. My ego had not allowed me to come to terms with that fact previously. I was also fascinated by the realization that I always look the same (I don't know why).

At 12:30, I went upstairs so that I wouldn't be alone. I was still incredibly dizzy and nauseated and walking and climbing stairs was very challenging. I collapsed on the bed, careful to stay on my side so that I would not throw up in my sleep in and die choking on my own vomit. I could hear my slow-breathing...it sounded like I had asthma--kinda wheezy. Every time I closed my eyes, I entered a non-sensical dream-world where random events occured and I was the ruler. I had double-vision every time I opened my eyes. I was recalling an account that I had read where the user had hallucinated entering a kingdom of bees or something and I tried as hard as I could to block it all out of my head because I'm terrified of insects. I stumbled into my sister's room around 1 am because my dad had gotten home from work (my sister had agreed to let me sleep with her so she could take care of me). I got up to go to the bathroom about 5 mins later and it felt like the world was tipping and spinning. I was so dizzy that I was shocked that I managed to sit directly on top of the toilet. I returned to my sister's room and passed out around 1:30.

I woke up at 6:50am to go to work. I was still very numb, shaky, and dizzy, so I had to call my bosses to let them know that I would be late because I couldn't drive in my condition (I just told them that I was sick...my co-worker had had the flu, so they didn't think much of it). If I had tried to drive then, it would've been equivalent to drunk-driving. I got to work around 8:45am. It's now 10am, and I'm still numb, dizzy, shivering, and my breathing's still depressed.

I'm never taking DXM again...my experience last night was definitely the most frightening drug experience that I've ever had. The worst, as far as nausea and puking goes, is probably still the time that I was dry-heaving till 3:30 am from 1 and a half shots of Gordon's Vodka the night before my history final (I'm Asian and I was running on little food and sleep). My DXM experience was even scarier than my shrooming experience when I thought that I'd lost my face and that I would never return from being completely and utterly confused. My advice if you're still thinking of trying DXM (I understand, I'm a curious person): start with a REALLY low dose, especially if you're small and have a fast metabolism like me. I hope this hasn't been too boring and long to read, but it's all still very fresh in my mind, which is still under the influence of DXM. Make sure you have a sitter if you're doing it for the first time--if my sister had not been there, I still think that I would have died.

I don't know why I reacted so harshly to it...I've done alcohol, weed, salvia d, nutmeg, e, shrooms, and some other weirdo legal stuff that I got off the net, but it's never been this overwhelming and scary (though the shrooms came close). I hope that this review will keep anyone from having the same horrible experience that I did. Good luck, and be careful!

Exp Year: 2001ExpID: 8998
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Feb 3, 2011Views: 35,312
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DXM (22) : Hangover / Days After (46), Health Problems (27), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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