Citation: Anonymous. "When Is Enough Enough?: An Experience with Cocaine, Alcohol & Cannabis (exp8927)". Erowid.org. May 12, 2004. erowid.org/exp/8927
I tried coke or 'cheese' as we liked to call it in October of 2000. I was 24 years old. I had seen many friends get f'd up on it, drop out of school, move back home because they were broke etc, but I still thought I could try it once, and walk away. And I almost did. But then a few months later, my roommate came home and had some, so the 3 of us did it again & had a great time, went to the bar, talked for hours & stayed up all night with boundless energy. Then it started to become a habit. We rarely went out without getting coked up first. One night in March 2001, I was pulled over for drunk driving & my friends were very supportive. So supportive, in fact, that they made sure I did plenty of lines the next morning, afternoon & night. And for many nights & weeks after that. And I'm not talking about schwag cheese. I was doing REALLY good, REALLY expensive stuff & I never paid for it. Which I guess was how I justified it. For the first 2 months of my relationship with my boyfriend we got high together, or we would have long conversations while I was coked up.
I finally realized that staying up til 6am on week nights & spending the first few hours at work in morning crashing wasn't going to cut it anymore. I told my friends I needed to chill out, but it was always around. They'd get home from the bar, wake me up, throw down a few lines & it'd start all over again. I didn't want to do it, I wouldn't seek it out, but I couldn't say no. I finally picked up & moved out. I've only done 1 line since May & I'm pretty proud of myself. I drink a helluva lot less, but still smoke weed everyday. I don't crave cheese anymore, but I wouldn't turn it down either. It's sad & pathetic but I'll never, ever beat it. Although, I won't let it beat me either...
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