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Like God Was Speaking Right Out of Him
Cannabis
Citation:   Raceywine. "Like God Was Speaking Right Out of Him: An Experience with Cannabis (exp82284)". Erowid.org. Oct 3, 2019. erowid.org/exp/82284

 
DOSE:
  smoked Cannabis
Spiritual Marijuana Experience

This is one of the most incredible experiences I've ever had. I hope I don't ever forget what happened and what God showed to me that night. What happened was my boyfriend and I went to a friend's house to smoke pot. After we did, we were all sitting in his friend's room and I started kissing my boyfriend. I couldn't stop. His face was so perfect. I said, 'Kissing is fun'. And we were all laughing about that. My friend jokingly said, 'I'll give you guys a moment.' He walked out put on 'No Quarter' from Led Zeppelin, turned out the light, and shut the door. I never noticed that he had glowing stars all over his room before, but he sure did. The fact that I had never seen them before was freaking me out. My boyfriend and I were still kissing, but he was shapeshifting. I knew then that I needed to get a glass of water.

I tried to make it seem like I wasn't freaking out again because this has happened before. I got up and drank like 5 glasses of water and went back in the room with him. We continued to kiss, but he was shapeshifting again.
We continued to kiss, but he was shapeshifting again.
He was shapeshifting into everyone that I had ever tried to impress, everyone that I hated, everyone that I loved, everyone I was scared of, everyone I was attracted to, and everyone I was not attracted to. At first I was scared, but then I just went with it. We started having sex, and I started crying. And I rarely cry. It was so beautiful. I kept telling him how he was everything to me and that I meant it -- because that's exactly what was going on in my head. It was insane. We were having sex and it seemed better than ever.

God was telling me that my boyfriend (or husband) represents God's love for me. Having a boyfriend that is mean to you or disrepects you, or having sex with someone you don't love is blasphemy. God reminded me of all these times where I had felt neglected. He was flashing all of these memories that I had almost forgotton in my mind, and he said that 'I was there. I wanted to be there. I loved you.'

I started crying some more because it was like I was talking to God directly when I spoke to my boyfriend. I was almost praying to him. I was saying that 'I always loved you.' When my boyfriend spoke, it was like God was speaking right out of him. He said, 'I've always loved you too. Don't cry. Its ok.'

God told me that everything I had experienced led up to this moment. He said, 'Everyone you hate, every passion, everyone you've loved. That's your God. I am your boyfriend. I am everything you've ever wanted. I am your life. I am your thoughts. I am the God of control.'

He said that there are many Gods, but I am the only one this world worships. We determine what God we worship by what kind of thoughts we make. Thoughts give power to the Gods, and they battle over this world. This explains consumerism and other things that allow people to feel power or a higher status. I asked him that what if I don't want to worship the God of Control. He said, then you'd give power to another God and with each generation, a new battle and a new God.

All of these thoughts were going into my head, even while we were having sex. I felt that in a sense I was having sex with God. I know it sounds weird, but it was so incredible. I was crying still, and my boyfriend asked me why I was crying, and I still felt like my boyfriend was god and I said, 'Because I need you.'

It was crazy. We finished having sex, and we went home. I fell asleep almost immediately (at 8:00 PM!!). When I woke up the next morning, I felt like I had been resurrected and like a huge burden was lifted off of me. I could breathe much clearer. It was amazing.

Exp Year: 2009ExpID: 82284
Gender: Not Specified 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Oct 3, 2019Views: 611
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Cannabis (1) : Glowing Experiences (4), Sex Discussion (14), Relationships (44), Mystical Experiences (9), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the authors who submit them. Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.


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