Citation: Unrealtruth. "Seeing Through the Eyes of God: An Experience with DMT (exp81390)". Erowid.org. Apr 19, 2021. erowid.org/exp/81390
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Two days ago my older brother who recently got out of court ordered rehab came to hang out. I never would have expected we were going to try the most potent psychedelic available that day, but I've heard people say it (dmt) really does find you. Me i'm an herb enthusiast; I love and smoke weed everyday. I don't do any thing else regularly, I'll have some of everything else occasionally, however. My other psychedelic experience includes (psilocybe) shrooms, dxm, salvia, LSA(morning glory seeds) and i've tried all the much less interesting substances like coke/and crack, all the member of the opiate family except fentanyl (no needles though), amphetemine (but not methamph) and a few of the benzodiazpines, and
a few not worth mentioning. Now, if you haven't tried psychedelics, theres about half of the experience, that is impossible to communicate or describe properly or at all to a point that its like trying explain colors or sight period to a man whos been blind since birth, for example. No regular pitiful drug 'high' comes close (except weed) let alone should even be compared with the powerful, immersive experience I have on the influence of DMT.
Now that aside, my experience in detail is as follows: I'm not exactly sure what I was doing in my room that day at that
moment. I was either playing guitar, playing video games, or downloading cds I borrowed from my brother to itunes. I was pleasantly stoned (as usual); I had smoked a bowl in a bong (usually I kill it in one hit) about 30 minutes ago from the current time, which I believe was about 10:00pm. So my brother was making some sort of 'omg no way' type-noises which I just barely noticed while I wasn't paying attetion. Then he came and asked me if I wanted to smoke DMT. I was the one who first heard about it and I've been wanting to try some for a while, and after having many mushroom experiences I wanted something the same yet different, and I still haven't found LSD yet either. So I told him ok but I am slighty anxious as with any new substance however this one in particular is said to be among the most intense experiences one can have.
So I said lets prepare by smoking a fat bowl of 15x salvia extract each which I still have a lot of from my last trip to the boardwalk. I get salvia quite often, and I'm quite familiar with it, so it's not worth explainig that short experience here, too. We smoked the salvia, 'tripped balls' (so to speak) and decided we were ready for DMT. We also thought about how salvia is fun, but too weird and different from all other psychedelics. I still like it, but after DMT my brother said he would be bored trippin on salvia again.
So finally we came inside the house(we enjoyed the salvia on the back porch) to my room, which is decked out in black lights, fluorescent black light posters, as well as non-fluorescent posters, covering 95% or so of the wall space, also the ceiling, and the spaces are filled in with cut-out magazine pages and high times posters and all sorts of light up things from spencer gifts. Also the bed folds into a couch, theres a stereo /w dvd palyer and video games, I used to watch antenna cable until it was canceled for the change to digital over analog. In short its a very comfortable place to get high and especially to trip. It was 10:30pm when we sat down, I gave my brother a cigarette 'bat' pipe with a screen crumbled up and stuck in the tip(bat means small one-hitter) to smoke it in. He's currently subject to regular drug testing, meaning he can get away with most things except weed(he used to smoke as much as me). So he was on a roxycontin 30 which he ate at about 7:00pm. I had packed a metal chamber pipe with some weed and smoked the salvia ontop 40 minutes ago. It was half packed still but I had definately burned the powerful extract flakes away and had burnt bud left.
The DMT, which was a gooey glob of crystalline crumbs, smelled very plastic-like, strange and synthetic just like I expected based on others' accounts. It also sort of smelled perfume-ish, in a way. He had explained to me he got it a whole year ago the day before he was shipped off to bible rehab,(which he hated every day of; we're somewhat anti-religion, although we think of ourselves as agnostic) He left it in a tin which he found while looking through his closet, but the tin opened and the little bag containing it was found on the floor. I was still very anxious but very excited when we sat on the couch and took it out of the little bag. He asked me to try it first, so I joked and said 'You wuss. You want me to be the guinea pig. HA! well it just so happens I like being a guinea pig, so pass it here' So he gave me the mirror it was sitting on and told me to try however much I want to start with. So I used a folder knife to cut off a small piece, but my bro said 'man thats too little' and doubled it with a second similiarly sized crumb. (I'm glad he did in the end. So we have no precise enough digital scale, therefore I don't know the numerical measurement, but it came out to be about the a third the size, or maybe a bit less than a grain of rice. I put it on top of the burnt bud, put a little fresh ontop to mellow the flavor, and after two minutes of quiet mental prep, a step I usually prefer to take when doing something physically crazy like one of those stunts that I'm not supposed to recreate from jackass or cky videos(yes my friends and I do some of those type things on occasion. But hey us idiots deserve to get injured, right? So don't worry.)
So its about 10:35pm and after my short meditation I hastily opened my eyes and hit the pipe hard, but stopped short when I began to really taste the smoke. I put it down, held it in and felt a slight head rush coming on. When I blew it out, I knew I had smoked enough but wanted to wait and see anyway. I only felt threshold effects about 1 minute later, and for the next 10 minutes I felt spaced out saw faint visuals and had a major head high. My brother had a similiar half-assed trip from a half-assed hit about five minute after I hit it. So I was disappointed at not really feeling anything huge yet, and alos at myself for hitting it like a little girl and decided to clear my pipe, also thinkin only as much as I got the first hit was left. Man was I wrong.
I saw it melt away thru the bud very fast, so I thought it mostly vaporized away. I figured the physics of it would be alike to smoking crack, but I forgot one important thing. There usually more left than I think. I picked up the pipe while still on threshold feeling and hit it deep and hard. I didn't taste it so bad but I heard it sizzle and knew I got something. I held it in as long as I could, until a very strange feeling was creeping on me. I blew it out and as soon as I did I knew I was coming up real fast. (It was about 10:45pm now, I think). I put the pipe down now and was amazed at how hard I was peaking. It was very, very similiar to the psilocybin shroom peak. There were incredible visuals more distinct and prominent than any I ever seen on any other substance. I said to my brother 'Oh my god... I'm feelin it now, and woooowwwww'. The first thing I saw when I looked up after placing down the pipe was an incredible swirling klaediscopic visual in the center of my vision, I believe this is what some refer to as the 'wheel' or the 'lotus'. I saw this for about 3 minutes when it changed to free form blobs of different patterns and color schemes. I said to my brother I need to touch you, no homo cuz i know that sounds weird, but I feel like I need to hold someone to anchor my astral being down to earth, or I'd leave my body and drift into space. I asked him If I was alive, and if he was sure, and he said yes, which I found somewhat comforting. I was truly feeling like I had transcended this dimension was now living parallel to this world in ethereal form. I looked around I saw perspective shifts to seem infinte, which was slightly overwhelming. So I sat back and asked for my covers, which like on shrooms I found both amusing and comforting. There was one point when I felt intense irrational fear, but also like on shrooms, I seem to be good at mentally chasing away or ignoring this. I just thought what if I don't come down for a while and it leaves me insane? Or waht if it triggers some latent schizophrenia or something? Then I found comfort in remembering I've had shrooms like 8 times, and I've eatin a whole quarter to myself and smoked salvia while on it so I thought If I was latently insane, it woulda happened by now. This is the same thing I usually think that causes me to have a difficult moment while tripping.
by 10:50 my brother packed again and joined me in DMT world. I was speechless for the main peak which i mostly described above; that lasted about 7 minutes. By 10:52pm I became very talkative and my brother was peaking. He wanted to put his hand on my shoulder now, noting that he he also felt it comforted him, and made him feel he communicate better (I had said that while peaking.) I had my cover over me and my head now and he said that looks fun, can i have half your covers? I shared and now we both looked like little kids(or grown up morons) laughing and joking in a cover fort. We both talked a hell of alot, because right after our respective peak our thoughts began moving very fast. I can't remember all of what we talked about, but like shrooms, we had a very philsophical, introspective, and sometimes silly, conversation. I had said in mid peak that if I died now, I wouldn't mind if I could just fly across an endless realm of swirling colors for eternity feeling like this. So we talked about what we think the next life will be, and how we feel close to some type of god, but we don't want the christian god and heaven, which he learned about at rehab. We thought eternity couldn't be singing praises to god at his thrones' side. We felt close to higher truth and existence all at once. We were also glad that DMT is so similiar to shrooms, our favorite tripping substance. I also remember that DMT is or is very like an analog to psilocybin. I mentioned that we were sort of back in the 'mushroom kingdom', a metaphor I just though of, and I wondered if the makers of the Mario series had this explicitly in mind when they thought up the setting and backstory(and the fact that shrooms are powerups in these games) of the mushroom kingdom in Mario Bros. We laughed but my bro said probably. I joked and said yeah, too. As we came down, my dad came to knock on door, cause it was time for my bro to go. He said please wait, and that he'll tell him what we were doing later after he didn't hear him say 'we're smokin DMT!' and 'hold on a minute!'. THis was a relief, because I don't want to be around people who aren't tripping with me. Literally, I thought 'they better not come here, and make me get up and do something I don't feel like doing, or waste my time talkin about unimportant crap!!'
It was about 10:58pm now, we talked and talked for most of the trip right after the peak. He went outside to smoke a cigarette, we were both feelin a chill, weedhigh-like aftertrip. I took I ride while he dropped off, We talked with my dad about it and what it was like, and I listened to headphones the half the way. So DMT? WOW. It was like seeing trhough gods eyes, if I can imagine that in any way. And I used to think that about shrooms. (thers till good though if you ever want to try psychedelics, start with shrooms. Or morning glory seeds. Psychadelics are powerful spiritual guides that help put my psyche in a more open perspective, which I think ultimately helps my brains and very being to evolve and/or transcend to higher existence.
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