Citation: Truthseeker. "Nature of Universe and Rebirth: An Experience with Cannabis (exp78921)". Erowid.org. Sep 18, 2018. erowid.org/exp/78921
I wanted to try marijuana for a long time, in our place it is banned and considered illegal. I donít want to tell my friends that I'm going to try.
It all started like this. It was a Saturday, I searched some online forums to find where I could get Marijuana in my place. I noted down four places. I was a bit excited and had some fear of getting caught while buying. With so much effort finally I got 5 Gms of marijuana.
I was extremely tired after the whole day of search. The big mistake that I did is that I did not research much about its effect or what dosage should be used and what to expect, the only thing I knew was as a first timer I will get cough and a cottonmouth. My parents were out of station so I decided itís the best time to try.
Around 1 am I started the process of making blunts. I emptied two king size cigarettes. As I am a bit tolerant to alcohol I thought would be fine to fill the pure weed without mixing it with tobacco (It was really wrong tolerance to marijuana has got nothing to do with marijuana effects). It was the time my girlfriend called me on fone. I was talking to her simultaneously I made two blunts.
The room was dark. The only light that I had was from the computer screen. I lit up the first blunt at 2.05 am. The first two puffs went smoothly after that the smoke was heavy I started coughing a bit then the cough got intensified as I was about to finish the first blunt. My Girlfriend on phone asked me why I was coughing. I lied her telling that I am trying a new brand of cigar and itís a bit heavy, it gave me a feeling of guilt. I told her I will call her back in 30 mins.
Now it started hitting me. The initial feeling was that I was flying. I felt thirsty I drank some water. Now I started laughing for no reason I felt really good. I took up the second blunt and lit it and had about four puffs now it hit me hard. I felt very tired at first I put off the blunt halfway and went to the hall and switched on the TV still laughing. the music in the TV did not make any sense. I thought I was laughing for about 30 mins. When I looked at the clock, it was only 2:15 only about 10 mins from my first puff I completely lost track of time. This gave me a strange feeling. Then I asked myself how long this is going to last. At this point I felt it would be nice if gets over soon. I started walking in the hall from this end to that end. There was new paper placed on the table. Every time I come there I stop and read the same news. It happened for about 30 times. The phone rang It was my girlfriend. I picked up the phone and shocked to here the voice. It sounded like she is underwater or something. And had a metallic sound to it. This time fear hit me I did not speak a word I cut the phones and switched it off.
Now the real part of experience which left me with so many questions still unanswered. For the past two months before taking marijuana I was studying about a principle in some sect of Hinduism, it is about realizing the self, i.e. that which is apparently manifested eternally and simultaneously into animate or inanimate. God, the Supreme Cosmic Spirit is the One, the whole and the only reality. Other than that, everything else, including the universe, material objects and individuals, are false and the one is Self.
The questions that I had in my mind during this study started coming up. I was trying to formulate something from my actions (donít know why I did this) I my still walking across the hall. Every time as I walked I did the same set of actions, reading the same news from paper, the only thing that changed was time. This gave me a feeling that the universe is of same nature, everything is repeating
This gave me a feeling that the universe is of same nature, everything is repeating
, we were here already in the previous world, after death we will be coming again to this world and do the same things, a feeling of inescapable repetitive cycles. This gave me feeling of depression and I thought somehow we have to escape this. Now I started feeling very hot I was sweating heavily, something is happening to me. I went to the bathroom and took a shower, nothing changed, my heart was pounding, I thought I'm about to die, I'm still sweating heavily, I decided to get help from someone. Itís about 3:10 am I called my friend. He did not pick the phone.
Then I gave up and thought I am going to die, the only thing that I wanted to do at this time was to figure out some solution to escape the of inescapable repetitive cycles of universe before I die. I went and fell on the bed, throughout the experience this is the first time that I closed my eyes. I felt like I am in Space, then some closed eye visual effects started appearing, concentric circles of orange and white with a black background rotating with constant speed and that same time going down in cosmos with a high velocity. I started believing that itís me traveling in the space waiting to take a new birth. I wanted to do something and get back before I take a new birth. Then I started asking questions to my self what was the One thing (ultimate reality) that was said in the principle, my mind made up some answer. It was me. I am the only one in this worldÖwho created everything through my imagination, nothing is real itís all my imagination, my parents are nothing but me Ö my friends are nothing but me in my previous birth Öthere is nothing called hot or cold itís my preconceived perceptions that I created in my previous birth, everyone is me I was Einstein in one of my previous birth. I'm everything but I m still unaware of this in my current birth, at this point I thought if I die there is nothing that I'm going to lose, because everything is me. So I gave up. Now there were no thoughts in my mind, completely blank, after 10 mins I came back to reality.
Now the time was 4:35 I realized that the high was gone. I was very hungry had some chocolate bars and biscuits. Now I felt back to normal. I fell asleep and woke up 11am the next morning, the next one day spent thinking about my experiences.
Summary of my First time Experience
1. I felt real thirsty.
3. I felt hot and was sweating.
4. Looked as if my heart is beating very fast (it did not last long).
5. Pulsating at the top of my head every time I shook it (a wave like feeling passing over my head).
6. Deja vu
7. Closed eye visuals.
8. Racing thoughts.
9. Distorted time perception
Now I know what to expect, the next time I smoked, I did it with one of my friends, we smoked calculated doses and had a sitter. The second time I felt safe and enjoyed it. So have your mind & environmental settings appropriate and it would have been better to have a sitter for the first time. Thanks for reading.
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