Citation: Clayton. "The Awakening of the Self-Aware Universe: An Experience with Mushrooms (exp76868)". Erowid.org. Sep 23, 2020. erowid.org/exp/76868
During the summer of 2008, some of my friends and I had discovered a source for mushrooms and decided to try some, but we all started separately. My first couple times were pretty uneventful, I would have moderate visuals, experience time dilation/compression and had a lot of fun with music (the most trippy song that I found was 3 Libras “All Main Courses” mix by APC).
The third time, however, was different...before this, I was caught unawares that there was also psilocybin in the stems as well so I had only been taking about half of an eighth. Coming up was just how I had become accustomed to, until I had reached my previous threshold, and I kept coming up. At this point, I began to notice geometrical patterns in the white parts of web pages. The patterns began to form words, but I can't remember what they said.
At this point, I was expecting to plateau but I was incorrect again. I began to feel like I was leaving my body even though I was still in my room. In my new awareness, I began to hear voices of (people?) observing me. I would ask questions about where I was, but would always get vague answers. I felt completely comfortable in this situation, like I already knew where I was and what was happening. Everything was oddly familiar, even though throughout my daily life I had never seen such a place. Knowledge was in some way flowing into my head, and I began to realize that I had become the embodiment of the universe.
I had become the self-aware universe, and I was waking up for the first time in ages. My observers were all a part of me, so were all of my surroundings and everything that I could see. We were all moving towards something, something big and wonderful. What it was, I still haven't been able to figure out to this day, and I was getting any answers from the people with me, because they were a part of me and thusly had no knowledge either. Time at this point had no meaning, no existence. Every piece of knowledge in existence was available to me, but it felt like there was only so much that my monkey brain could comprehend.
This new world that I had discovered began to fade as my soul was being poured back into my body. As I started to come down, I decided it was a good idea to try to get some sleep, but the 'shrooms always have a stimulant effect on me.
At this time, I had no idea what had happened...I had not done enough research into 'shrooms to know about the disassotiative effects and this scared me off. I had no idea how to comprehend what had happened to me. However, I have found comfort in knowing that this is pretty normal for a hard trip. I can't wait to take some again, next time will be with a couple of my trusted friends, though.
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