Mushrooms - P. cyanescens
Citation: Verin. "A Beautiful and Loving World: An Experience with Mushrooms - P. cyanescens (exp73836)". Erowid.org. Oct 5, 2021. erowid.org/exp/73836
I’m not the kind of person that does a lot of drugs, although I believe that most have something to offer if they are approached with respect for their capacity to harm as well as heal. Recently I’ve been interested in psychedelics, but have only had a chance to try a few of them. My two experiences with mushrooms (P. cyanescens) have been extremely wonderful for me. I will try to reconstruct one of these experiences so that others might learn from it, but I really had no concept of time during this trip, so events may not be in exactly the right order.
The first time I tried mushrooms, I was with my best friend and 2 other girls, neither of which I really knew. One of the girls and my friend did the mushrooms with me. I ate one stalk and one half of a cap to begin with. Within half an hour, neither I nor my friend was feeling anything, so we both decided to eat another half cap. This was the perfect amount for me to begin with I think.
The first sensation I began to notice was when I would hug myself on the floor, I felt like my arms were melding into my body. Eventually I got this sensation with the floor as well. I began to notice that everything I looked at had a personality and felt very new and wondrous. My appreciation for every day items grew exponentially during the trip (and it has stayed with me ever since). Even the simplest thing like the cigarette smell in the floor was something to enjoy and love. Just as I was getting very high on the mushroom, I decided to use the restroom. Urinating on mushrooms was extremely mesmerizing. The sensation of something leaving my body felt completely alien and wonderful at the same time. On the way back into the living room I realized I was relying completely on muscle memory to walk and communicate. I could function like a normal human being, but I felt like a floating spirit.
The peak hit us all simultaneously. I’d like to stress at this time the importance of having a good trip-sitter for any first time experience with something. The girl who was not doing mushrooms with us was completely wonderful (I found out later that she enjoys trip sitting, and does it regularly). She took the role of DJ, and we found ourselves sitting on the floor discussing the power of music. The notes and songs were physical entities in themselves, and the room would take on the mood of the song. My appreciation for music sky rocketed on mushrooms, and I not only heard, but felt every note and lyric. Eventually, our trip-sitter got out a big blanket for us, and we all marveled at the texture of the blanket. I thanked the blanket for being there for us, and we all lay together on it listening to Bittersweet Symphony. It felt as if all of our bodies were molding into one, while we all radiated pure love to each other. I felt like I had experienced the first orgasm of my life (without ejaculating, mind you). The girl tripping with us went into another room and I enjoyed the cosmic colors and sensations with my eyes closed. She came back in and rubbed water on our arms. The feeling of water was also new and exciting, and kept begging to be noticed for much longer than one might feel water under normal conditions.
Following this, we realized we had been indoors for quite a while, so we walked out onto the balcony. The image that we saw remains with me to this day. The world is truly a beautiful place, and I realized it for the first time that day. What is so wonderful about mushrooms for me is that the world always looks like that, but the mushrooms helped me to see it that way. Everything radiated life, energy, and love, without judgment and completely innocent. Our trip-sitter gave us paper and asked if we would like to write a letter to ourselves. I decided I would give it a try, but ended up staring at the brand new world for 20 minutes before I wrote anything down. I ended up just drawing what I was feeling, and I have the drawing hanging above my bed still. It was as if I had never really felt paper before, and it was just amusing to glide the pen across the microscopic bumps and wrinkles. Then I realized I had never truly felt a pen either… so I thanked the pen and the paper, and put the drawing on a shelf inside. As evening approached and the night air grew cooler we discussed religion and philosophy. I had many revelations during these conversations and during moments of silence, and ever since I have been completely thankful for every moment I am alive, and a very openly loving person.
During the come down, we continued to discuss a variety of topics, or simply stared in awed silence at each other, marveling at the power of the magic mushroom. One of the more remarkable properties of Psilocybin for me is its ability to let the user “interface” or become intimately familiar with other people and things simply by looking at them. Using the Alexander Shulgin rating system for intensity of action, I would call my first experience a very strong +++. Only once during the trip did things start to take on a demonic or “evil” light, and during this time I simply sent my love to those things as well, and they immediately turned soft and joyous again. Everything was so beautiful and personal that I am sure I had tears in my eyes the entire time. Mushrooms are definitely my psychedelic tool of choice, and I have felt indescribable things on them. Like any psychedelic, they can turn on a careless user, and this is simply something one must take into consideration before trying them.
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