Citation: happyone. "Sentimental Empathy: An Experience with AMT (exp7286)". Erowid.org. Dec 31, 2001. erowid.org/exp/7286
Our first experience on AMT was something my friends, L and B, planned for some time. After the whitish powder finally arrived in the mail from an internet order, it was only a matter of waiting for a time when all three of us had a large enough window of free time away from responsibility. We had read as much as we could on the substance, and we felt we were fully prepared physically and mentally. All three of us were fairly experienced with psychadelics beforehand, and all psychologically stable.
From what we researched, we decided to take 40 mg each, and we put it in gelcaps. We took the caps at 10:00 pm at L's apartment on entirely empty stomachs. We had read of the nausea associated with the onset of AMT, and wanted to avoid any discomfort. For the next few hours we all sipped on water though. L and B never had any upset stomachs at all, but I started to feel a little sick to my stomach at T+1 hr, so I smoked a leaf joint. After that there was no nausea whatsoever.
At about the T+1 hr mark, we were all beginning to feel the onset. Some speedy effects, like a slight body buzz and for myself, some mild disorientation. B and L had slight body twitches, and my jaw was beginning to get tight also. At that point I began to chew on a pacifier to prevent my teeth from grinding, and I ended up needing it most of the night. By the time an hour and 45 minutes passed, we all felt as if we were high on MDMA. We had very emapatheogenic effects, and a very pleasant body buzz, just tingly sensations all over.
We were happy to note that we weren't spaced out and forgetful like we would get with MDMA, however. We felt total clarity of mind. There was no rush to say something when you thought it, because you would still remember what you wanted to say later. We were also experiencing some fairly intense, LSD-like open-eye visuals. Everything was waving around and warping, but everything also appeared beautiful. By T + 2.5 hrs, we had reached the plateau that lasted until T+ 8 hrs before even beginning to show signs of winding down. Unlike reports we had read however, the empatheogenic qualities did not wear off at any point, we felt the same effects the entire trip.
The one word I would use to describe AMT, is 'sentimental.' Our conversations became reminiscent of the past, and hopeful of the future. We would discuss different events we had connected with emotionally in our lives, and we would totally understand why it was so impactful, and things that were impactful for another, became meaningful for others as well. Music was also very intense, but for different reasons than any other drug we had experienced. Rather than just sounding cool, or being soothing to the emotions, it was an intensely personal experience. We felt as if we understood the emotions the artists we heard were feeling. We could understand each and every note, along with it's signifigance. Words were so incredibly powerful and overwhelming.
I like to compare it to MDMA in many ways, but it had such a positive advantage over MDMA. Where an MDMA trip consists of loving everything in such an artificial way, where even unpleasant things seem pleasant, AMT made the beautiful even more beautiful and meaningful than it could ever be on MDMA, but the not so beautiful, was not made falsely beautiful.
Things we deemed unpleasant or in need of improvement just seemed like an acceptable part of life. We could also understand the solutions to many of the things we saw as needing improvement around us, and with a totally spiritual and loving awareness. We came up with so many solutions to help the loved ones in our lives with their emotional and psychological issues. The big thing was that even though we had so much love it was overwhelming, we were able to direct it and use it in a constructive manner.
And the way the bonds were strengthened between B, L, and I feel so much more genuine. After a trip on MDMA, the intensity of the bond seems to fade the next day. With AMT, it did not leave. We weren't saying things that we would only say on MDMA, we were speaking with entirely open minds, but not focused on immediate pleasure, it was more focused on values and long-term happiness. I came to a new understanding of drugs too. Something powerful that came to mind that night was that while drugs open windows, only people can open doors.
I realize this is an incredible long account, but it was also an incredibly long experience. The trip lasted until about noon the next day when I finally laid down to sleep. Unlike LSD or some other drugs though, there was never the feeling of, 'oh God, when is this gonna end, I'm ready to go back now.' It was entirely pleasant the entire time. After I slept for just 2 hours, I was up all day, with pleasant after affects. There was never any coming down or weariness. AMT is without a doubt the most incredible drug I have ever experienced - out of mushrooms, LSD, MDMA, and nutmeg. I definately plan to put it to use in the future in the right situations.
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