Citation: Rob. "Suprisingly Horrible Trip on Pills: An Experience with MDMA (Ecstasy) (exp72727)". Erowid.org. Jul 28, 2008. erowid.org/exp/72727
First of all, I've taken pills before and have had some of the best experiences of my life while high on e. The bad trip I experienced in this case was purely due to my own carelessness, and it's taught me to be much more careful in the future.
While out with some friends we decided to get some pills for a certain DJ set we'd been looking forward to. Each of us had 3 pills to take over the course of the evening.
I took one half an hour before the set started, and began to come up about the right time. Soon after (not sure how soon, time was all over the place), a friend told me he'd already taken his other pills. Whether or not it was because I was high, or because I was just stupid, I took the next two at once while I was still way, way up from the first. I didn't stop to think that his tolerance was far higher than mine.
I first started getting concerned when I noticed trails. I'd never had trails before so I realised this was the highest I'd ever been. But I was still going up. At one point there were strobes and I remember thinking I was standing still, looking at them, but a quick glance at my body revealed that it was moving, completely independent of me. That old cliche of the music moving 'through' someone, I now understand completely what it means. It was as if the music was waves on the sea and my body was a boat bobbing up and down. It was 100% out of my control, dictated by the beats which I was feeling had become a part of me.
Suddenly, the set ended (a 2 hour set, went by in what I remember as about 15 minutes). I turned around to leave as I was starting to panic about the fact that we didn't have any water (the nearest free water was a 15 minute walk away at the best of times). To my unbridled horror, all I could see in front of me was an endless crowd and I couldn't get out.
I started feel sick and my eyes were rolling into my head uncontrollably. I felt that if I left them up there for too long or closed my eyes for longer than a second, I would surely lose consciousness, possibly even die. Whether or not this was true, or a product of the drug, I have no idea. My friends seemed concerned about me (some of them were sober) but I was unable to open my mouth and express my concern due to the intense lockjaw.
I felt someone's hand grab mine and we struggled through the crowd for what felt like hours. The whole time I felt as if I was going to die. Suddenly we broke out of the crowd and I felt as if I could breathe for the first time. I felt a rush of happiness and gratitude towards my friend who had helped me out. My nausea disappeared and my eyes stopped rolling so much (oddly the eye-rolling was the worst thing about this whole experience). I was still extremely thirsty but I knew I could get water in time now.
The rest of the trip was quite pleasant, though some odd things happened which lead me to believe the pills were cut with some kind of hallucinogen. For example, when I closed my eyes, I found myself still able to see everything around me quite clearly, though when I opened them again, it was obvious that the image hadn't been real. Also when I shut my eyes I was able to call up friends' faces in black and white, when I heard them speak their faces shot up to look at me, though their mouths didn't move.
In the future I will never EVER take pills unless I am near a good supply of water. And if I do take them I'll be sure to bring a watch so I can time how long it's been. I've never been so scared in my entire life!
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