Citation: Reed. "To Opiate-land!: An Experience with Oxycodone (exp68399)". Erowid.org. Sep 14, 2008. erowid.org/exp/68399
My interest in drugs and their effects on the brain had begun soon after I enjoyed my first joint. My meager resume prior to the experience had included weed, alcohol, cocaine and diphenhydramine. At this point in my life I was constantly undergoing bouts of depression and feelings of inadequacy. It is also important to note my social anxiety and shyness, for reasons that will later become apparent.
A good acquaintance of mine, who will henceforth be referred to as C, informed me that while searching through an abandoned van near his house, he had stumbled upon a pill container. He told me that the pills inside were codeine pills, and having been anxious to try opiates for some time, I had accepted the opportunity to take them. As C was a good friend of mine and a nice person, he gave them to me for free and requested none of them for himself. A quick glance at the label revealed to me that these 12 pills were not codeine, but actually oxycodone; I was somewhat surprised and excited at this notion.
Since consuming anything found in an abandoned van seemed like a worrisome prospect to me, I made sure to ID the pills online using several pharmaceutical websites. After ascertaining the pills constituents (5 mg of oxycodone and 325 mg of acetaminophen), I further educated myself on the efficacy of oxycodone and the standard recreational dose thereof. The hepatoxic nature of acetaminophen was a concern to me but I soon discovered that only a very high dose was jeapardous to my liver. After I was satisfied with my knowledge of the pills and their potential effects, I locked my bedroom door, spilled 6 pills on to my desk, and got to work.
My aforementioned study of oxycodone led me to believe that insufflation would be the best route of administration. With a hammer I gently tapped each pill, causing it to crumble into smaller pieces. I then pressed the head of the hammer onto the pile of pieces and applied a gently rolling pressure so as not to lose any precious powder. With relative ease the pile of pills was transformed into a very fine mountain of powder. With a gift card I found laying on my desk I combed the powder into about 5 lines. Then, using a hollowed out pen body, I began to insufflate the first line. My ignorance of insufflation was apparent as I opened my mouth exhaled, expelling powder outwards and coughing a few times. My mistake, I soon realized, was the exorbitant diameter of the pen body I was using. Switching to a standard Bic ballpoint pen yielded improved results, and I had little difficulty in railing off the remainder. Unsure of what to look for, I was soon greeted by feelings of warmth and contentment. All anxiety over possible effects was gone as the feelings increased thricefold and where observed to be overwhelmingly positive yet innocuous in nature.
The soaring crescendo of pleasure that was arising in my body came to a glorious climax at around T+ 30 minutes; I coined the term opiate land to describe the various effects I had felt. The warm waves of bliss coursing throughout my body made me feel happy to be alive. My vision swam and my sense of equilibrium had gone askew. I was fully immersed in the opiate experience and wanted to stay there forever. Yet something else I hadn't expected was occurring: complete empathy and love for everybody, and an overwhelming desire to talk to people. I was nearly rejoicing over the good of humanity.
All traces of depression had left my mind and I welcomed my new found abatement of despondency with open arms. I decided to go out for a walk with my mp3 player, an activity I often enjoy sober. Walking down the street, listening to my favorite tunes, I was in complete and total euphoria. All my prior concerns had melted away and all I could think about was how much I enjoyed life. This feeling empowered me with a greatly increased ability to converse and joke with people, as I found out when I went to a local store(about T + 1:30). My shyness and social anxiety was totally and utterly gone. Yet this wasn't like alcohol, it didn't simple drown out my problems and stupefy me to the point of elation; it genuinely made me see the good in everything and everyone without clouding my mind at all. I felt connected to everybody and unlikely my usually shy self, I would have been able to talk with anybody about anything with no reservation.
When I retired home(T+ 3:00), still basking in the glorious revelations that I had made and still buzzing as well, I genuinely had a new outlook on life. Sleeping was no issue at all, and I often suffer from insomnia.
Upon waking the next morning and realizing the absence of any hangover, I resolved to repeat the experience, which I have done several times since this was written with no signs of physical dependence. In addition to the euphoria I experience while under the influence of opiates, they have shown me the potential for happiness that resides within my own brain and this have allowed me to think more positively at all times. This was a gratifying phenomenon, as I had predicted the nature of the opiate induced euphoria to be largely ephemeral.
Of course, I could not in good faith advise the repeated use of any addictive drugs, but having been depressed and socially awkward, opiates really showed me what happiness is.
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