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Im Gonna Try to Nullify My Life
Heroin
by lyndsie
Citation:   lyndsie. "Im Gonna Try to Nullify My Life: An Experience with Heroin (exp67212)". Erowid.org. Jun 16, 2018. erowid.org/exp/67212

 
DOSE:
  repeated   Heroin

BODY WEIGHT: 100 lb


I'm not sure if this will be allowed although I hope it gets through. It is an experience, but one of mostly withdrawls. A warning of sorts. I didnt know. I want others prepared. I don't want this to be a love story but I just know that with how I feel about it, it won't come out any other way. I'm what you would call a junkie... Oh mother would be proud...

Any way- Heroin has been my remedy for anything that ails me. Stub my toe? Gimme a bag. Cut my fingernail too short, hell gimme two bags.
Heroin has been my remedy for anything that ails me. Stub my toe? Gimme a bag. Cut my fingernail too short, hell gimme two bags.
Its sad in a sense, but the way I feel on it is incredible. I describe it as a big electric blanket of love. Warm and fuzzy and right with the world.

Now for the praise to end- The withdrawls... Pain. Hurt. Sadness. Nausea. Pain. Pain. Pain. Chicken noodle soup wont help me now. The thing that makes me sick is the thing that makes me better. It warps my mind. It is the most devious drug I have come across, totally taking over mentally, physically... Priorities get scrambled.
It is the most devious drug I have come across, totally taking over mentally, physically... Priorities get scrambled.
I was detoxing when my body hurt so bad, I could barely walk and soon collapsed, sobbing into my cramping legs. I never knew what it would be like and baby its no joke. I sat there on the kitchen floor with thoughts of hanging myself just to stop the pain. I ended up calling 911 and good thing they cant turn anyone away because a junkie who didn't get her fix is hardly a priority in the emergency room, but I was mercifully given ativan and sent on my way.

Nothing I say will likely change the course of ones life because who really pays attention to the risk at the end of the day? I just hope maybe somebody will read this and say - hmm- that doesnt sound like fun at all! I'm still a junkie. 19. Midwestern mormon, little blonde girl with tracks that make my mother blush. Maybe I would have changed if someone warned me about the pain because I started h with intentions of ceasing pain- but instead traded them for bigger and badder pains.

Exp Year: 2007ExpID: 67212
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Jun 16, 2018Views: 3,414
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Heroin (27) : Not Applicable (38), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Addiction & Habituation (10), Difficult Experiences (5)

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