Citation: MeanBastard. "Welcome to Goodbye Mind: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (20x extract) (exp64664)". Erowid.org. Sep 8, 2007. erowid.org/exp/64664
Alright, before I get into the full mind-devastation that was soon to ensue, some background on the events that preceded the trip and a little about myself. I am 26 years old, I live in California, and I started relatively later than most into drinking/drug use. I started drinking when I was 19, as well as smoking weed, and I then tried some speed, which is the worst drug on planet earth, once was more than enough for me, and I have tripped on shrooms 3 times and had a great time for each one.
I had been told of Salvia by a few acquaintances, and from what I was told the general consensus was that Salvia was either A.) Complete bullshit and 'fake weed', or B.) A total tripout experience that was unlike anything else they had ever experienced in their life. Naturally this piqued my interest. Could such a drug exist that had such obvious parity in experiences? I had to see for myself, so being the studious man I am I decided to read all about this strange plant before I bought it.
I read all the FAQS I could find to gauge the usage, settings recommended and the like. After fulling immersing myself in all the Salvia knowledge I felt confident in making a purchase of the strongest variant I could find, which is called Standardized Lab Tested 20x Extract. Personally I enjoy taking life to the farthest extremes so even though I was a first timer I had no apprehension whatsoever to going straight to the hard hitting pinnacle of Salvia.
I remember waiting for 4 days for that discreet brown padded envelope arriving at the place I was staying at for a couple months. I opened it up, observed the 1 gram of Salvia as being rather dark brownish/black in color, and it smelled like freshly cut morning dewed grass. I said 'Cool, let's do this' and I prepared my bong with the Salvia locked and loaded. Now, the place I was staying at was one of my family member's houses with his wife and their 2 year old kid. I had notified them that I was going to take something that may trip me out hard and to not worry or get concerned that I was losing my mind. I decided to make the trip alone and without a sitter, which was a colossal mistake. Bring a sitter or pay the consequences like I did.
So, I head out to the porch outside where 2 dogs are known to hang out in the backyard. I take a big hit of the Salvia, hold it in for 30 seconds, which was fairly difficult to do as I started to feel the effects creeping in about halfway through the hit. I remember blowing out the hit, then about 2 seconds later my mind and world blew apart. I remember feeling a distinct feeling of 'What the fuck?!' Then my world went into hyperspace mode WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH. It literally BLEW my field of vision apart and everything went a thousand miles an hour, except me.
I knew I was standing upright, but I completely forgot about everything, including the bong I was holding. I must have fell because all of the sudden I remember my mind doing backflips and somersaults, I was rolling like I was in a box that someone kept flipping end over end. As it turns out, I did indeed fall and I scared the living shit out of the dogs, they did not come back for over an hour, but the bad news was I had fallen and broken my bong and cut my arm with the pieces. I did not feel any pain at the time though, I was more stricken by an insanity of what the hell is going on more than anything.
By some miracle I got myself back into the house and into my room. My room is not my room now. I am now in first person mode, like in Doom or a game similar to it. The lights are on, but nothing feels real. I feel like I am in my own cartoon. Sounds became unreal and very echoey. I said out loud, 'What the fuck?!' and then some alien voice that was somehow mine but somehow at the same time wasn't me repeated it back to me in a mocking tone. I then said 'WTF!' It repeated it back to me, as if this was its little game now and I had entered it's world. I got frustrated with this voice that sounded like it was coming through a tin can amplified through a megaphone.
Suddenly I went through the walls. I was 5000 feet away looking at myself in my room, but it was like the room had been placed directly into outer space and I was seeing the cube and myself as a tiny little figurine inside the room from far away. During this time, I remember feeling like I was flying, but then the world melted. Deja vu crept in violently. I have been here before! But how did I get here? I was seriously afraid now, I thought at the time I had lost my mind, and I was stuck in this fucking game and somehow everyone was fucking with me. I tried to walk out the door into a hallway, but everytime I tried to go out it would loop the same thing over and over again, I couldn't get out. This frustrated me to no end.
Now I was annoyed and feeling rather helpless, I said 'What the Fuck' one last time. This time the white walls in my room absorbed the words WHAT THE FUCK and the words actually were visible like if I wrote them on the wall, but I didn't. The WTF ran from floor up the wall vertically, melted into it, and came through the ceiling and disappeared. Then the wall I was looking at became a white-shag haired carpet texture that bristled like a strong wind was gusting across it. I was beyond disbelief.
Then my brother's wife and her 2 yr old daughter come to see what's going on. They looked real and solid, but they were both smiling at me so I assumed they were running this cartoon game I was stuck in. The world around them was hyperspace blurred, but not their faces. I looked past them into the living room where the TV was on, and sure enough there was a squat 5 foot tall silhouette of a figure, not quite a man, but seemed like an imitation of one. The shadow man peeped his head around the corner, flashed two diamond eyes at me, and then chuckled and disappeared.
My brother's wife and daughter now asked me a question, but it didn't make any sense. It sounded like I was in Charlie Brown Peanuts world and they were the wah, wah, wah wah wah wah, wah noises that are heard but no real words. I said my arm feels funny and it didn't feel like my arm. It felt like stinging sandpaper. I was bleeding from the cut from my fall on the broken bong evidently, but when I looked to see the cut my arm suddenly made the cut disappear and my arm looked completely normal. I then told my brother's wife that she isn't real and nothing is real. She said no I'm real so I knew she was, so I grabbed out to her and accidentally pushed the little girl she was holding. She then told me to stop it so I said sorry and I tried to regain my composure.
Finally I started to regain some composure and the cartoon world seemed to fade out moment by moment. The total trip time was 10 minutes, and I was extremely terrified the entire time. As it turns out I did everything wrong. The setting was set up for all the wrong disturbances to occur. I fell and broke my bong so that most likely triggered a bad trip. In retrospect, I should have been alone in a quiet room with very little light or no light, and never around people who aren't understanding of drug usage.
Fast forward a week later. Trip #2 I had with my friends who never had Salvia before, and I was anxious to try it again with better company and settings. This time was MUCH more fun, but still very scary as Salvia completely destroys my mind while I am in it's world. The main difference this time was I did the 20x Salvia in the car and the world became words, and when I say words I mean that trees became an F, a curb rolled up to make a part of a U, a window dissolved and made a C, and a lawn and house merged for a K. Everything became words, even my friends. They became letters with just a mouth and teeth, and these words were actually laughing and talking to me like everything was perfectly fine.
Also the curb below my feet as I opened a car door became a Grand Canyon of impossible distance, so I wasn't about to jump outside the car. Another interesting note was that the houses and yards took on these bizarre skin. It was like I was seeing actual blood cells and plasma running through their surfaces, not unlike those science shows you see that will show under microscopic magnification what exactly happens inside blood. Everything felt like my own cartoon, it was complete and utter insanity!
In closing, I recommend that anyone with an interest in getting a completely interesting and albeit frightening trip that is unlike anything else on planet earth, try 20x Standardized Lab Tested Salvia. It will open your eyes and make you question everything in life afterwards, and everything will change as far as interpretation is concerned.
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