Citation: twiztidditzwit. "Hate to Love It Love to Hate It: An Experience with Petroleum Ether (Naptha) (exp62587)". Erowid.org. Dec 27, 2009. erowid.org/exp/62587
Gasoline: Hate to Love It Love to Hate It
It started at a friends house, around a bondfire at night. The night is clear and a freeway is nearby. This is my first experence with gas. We had a cloth doused in gas and passed it around. There were three of us including me. The first hallucination was with the sound I was hearing, A wah-wah effect included with every sound. Not fast though. One wah about every couple of seconds. I felt good but my mental state had been changed somehow. I was still alert thinking this was the end of our fun. Said ah hell if this is it, then lets do more. I was WAY wrong. This is ONLY the beginning. Couple more huffs, put more gas, then huff some more. The Wah seemed to be the only sound left. Began to lose sense of reality/space/time. Anything and everything I knew did not matter. Not in a careless sense, just that the stress of exsistance was hidden due to the amazing trip I was in. In my mind I was trying to figure out this shit!
What I came up with does not make sense now but it did at the time. I somehow came up with this: The longer I held my breath, the faster I would 'race' (will elaborate). The stars were the check points and the cloth was a contestant. Not human, just a inanimate object that had a personality. The rotation of the cloth, as we passed it, sparked a 'starting point' and suddenly I shoot off into the stars riding the lights from the cars on the freeway in my peripherals. Next star, next star, next star and I feel the wind hit me, and as I race, colors swarm around me in mathmatical syncronization. Then, slowly, as I come down I find that Iam running with my legs, sitting in a chair, saying, 'IM ON A Galaxy!!!' Over and over again. The wah was replaced with a chiming sound like a tinkerbell type sound.
When it all ended my mind felt like it was waiting. Like a cursor in the middle of typing but just sittin there, waiting... My friends laugh at me for my trip. We pack up and call it quits. The next day I return to his house but he had to leave for the moment. He said I could watch tv or what ever so I did, while huffing. So as Im alone I begin to feel light and my peripferals fade away so that all I see is the TV. Many others report a DeJa-Vu. Here's mine... In my mind I have a thought that the cloth in my hand to someone not knowing about 'huffing' could be costrued as Im masterbating and THATS the cloth. Immediatly after that thought I think what if somone walks in the room and my amazement of the DeJa-Vu would give off a reaction to certify the first thought for someone. Then after that thought, I hallucinated it, in reverse: Weird reaction certifying the misunderstanding, then the misunderstanding itself, then the person envolved, backing out of the room closing the door. Once the door closed, it opened right back up, person walks in, see's me and the cloth, I sit up really fast from the crazy Deja-Vu (which is the certinty, for the person, that I was masterbating), He says ew, and leaves the room as I try to explain.
Turns out that the person is actually my friends brother. After that, my curiosity for the drug grew emmensly. I wanted to know how, why, what does it mean, ect and persued to find out how I did it.
Then months later a seperate friend of mine and I were tryin to get buds but was all dry. So as I pass his dirtbike, it clicked. (FROM THIS POINT ON I REGRET ALL OF IT) I show him and we settle ourselves down in the livingroom using a cloth like I had before. I put music on that has a low, heavy beat. I litterally see transparent sound waves come from the sub. Then because of my 'know it all' attitude and the already growing curiosity for more, my mind simplified it with, 'Gas must enhance the senses!' Which aided in my 'want' for huffing. I continued. After a bit, a section of the music played backwards. The beat, the lyrics, compleatly backwards. I know the song so well I knew better, but your mind believes it so I start the song over (no huffing) and its fine. I know it didnt skip, it was mp3. I then make the comment in my mind that gas might change the chemistry of my brain.
Did not want to believe it though because I was hooked on these hallucinations that arent just visual. I had them IN my head, heard them, felt them, and interacted with them! Later that night I hinted to my friend that things might be different at night... (remembering my first time). They were. WAY DIFFERENT. Even more then the first time. We sat in the back of a truck and gazed off into the stars. After about five minuets, we both report to each other that it feels as though we are zooming towards the star we were looking at. When I looked away, or to another star it would start over. So I continued to focus on one star. As I zoom off to the star wind hits my face which gave a tunnel effect and all the other stars formed around the one star. I always avoided the stars that fell inbetween the powerlines because of the fact that I might get shocked as I zoom off. I forced myself to do it after a while and as I go the power lines they felt as though they streched across my face like cheese cutter wire. We did this trip so often we coined a phrase for it: 'Rising UP'.
Because of the moonlight it created an awsome contrast of shadows and dim light which was perfect for complete hallucinations (ie. IN A WORLD OF HALLUCINATIONS) I called this: 'being on a galaxy' I also became giddy at the time and looking over the railing of the truck I look down at the dirt and pebbles. A comic strip immerges. Not in whole though. Scene for scene. And my eyes 'knew' where to look for the next scene. There were four scenes constructing one cartoon dog picking up a rock and smacking another unsuspecting cartoon dog on the head. The detail was that of a cartoon and I found it to be very funny. After that I look over to my friend and his hood is over his face. He is groaning. You would think that my response to that is 'are you okay?' bit no, I somehow idealized that he was in a tunnel of colors and could not get out of the trip.
After watching him for a couple minuets I gently rub from his forehead to his chin 'narrowing the tunnel' to bring it to a stop. I did it about four times before he asked what I was doing in which I replied, 'Im helping you out of that tunnel...' He agreed with me and thanked me. I think now, how did I know? But then, I knew what I knew and that was that...
Weeks and weeks go by of this pattern with the hallucinations generally related to each other with the occasional oddball. My friend fell out of the excitement but I pressed on, deturmined to figure it all out. I began to feel my mindset give. Random thoughts, AND I MEAN RANDOM, swarm my mind uncontrollibly. I believe that this is because too much blood is going to my head and the way to stop it is to hold my neck of the blood. Does'nt work but after sitting through it, it goes away. To this day after not huffing for about three years, I can still feel it in my mind and the way my visuals are precieved. My mind seems to be much slower in processing these visuals and if I am tired and in a dark area, transparent hallucinations can be seen. I know what Ive done to my mind is irreversible. The extent of my trips proceed... I am in fact an entinty reborn in a human body to protect the stars.
My name? Yaochieo (Yao-chee-oh). And I must 're-learn' my abilities during the day and fight at night. I began to control my trips to an extent. I lifted a RV off the ground with my mind and when I let it down it bounced like it really would from that height. I could ride the powerlines into the sky and move stars with wy hand. When I was'nt huffing I felt irritable and angry. Every night though I would go out for at least three hours to trip or hold up my name of protection. Gradually I would earn my abilities but once and a while, no matter how much I huffed, no trip. Must be a chemestry thing. And then it finally ended. I cant trip anymore. No matter what. So here I write... Gas can STOP YOUR HEART! I am very luckey to be alive but I must live with the possibility of cancer. Brain? Lung? Heart? Who knows... but gas goes through all of that and more. Never huff ANYTHING.
I regret all of what ive done even though I said at the time gas is awsome and id never quit. I feel the negitive effects now and gas isnt worth it. I think I may have developed a minor case of dislexia when reading or writing and even sometimes when I speak... I cannot express how dangerous inhailents are but for what I HAVE expressed, I hated loving it, now I love hating it!
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