Citation: ClaireLee. "My Best Friend's Legs: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (10x extract) (exp62526)". Erowid.org. Dec 17, 2009. erowid.org/exp/62526
As I am sure that most people know by now, Salvia divinorium is a legal herb in most states in the United States and elsewhere in the world. Its legality and allure attract some people, with its promise of an intense, magical, trip, for only a short amount of time. My trip is not a high dose one, not really low dose either. I’m still not sure of the actual dose. But it is a funny and strange experience that gave me a quick intro to what I thought shrooms might be like.
My friend once told me about Salvia and I did a little research and found out some interesting things, but I wasn't quite yet a believer. So my friend, (he was a pretty big herb guy) got hold of a big bag of some 10x and gave me a gram or so. It looked like green fish food and smelled like some kind of seasoning for chicken I ate once. Needless to say I was skeptical.
But the next sunny day I brought the baggie to my best girlfriend’s house. She too was quite skeptical and kept saying things like “It would literally be a waste of my bong water, and bong water’s free…” but I pushed on until she finally gave in. She hadn’t researched this stuff, I had. So me and her and her boyfriend all drove out to this nice spot in the country at a nice park with a large field to run in a such things as that. We packed about half the gram into his little bong and I took a massive hit of it. I remember the smoke tasting bad. Not like the soft sweet cigarette smoke I had become used to. I wanted to cough but I knew I had to hold the hit in a long time (I had done my research after all…)
My lungs burned. All I could focus on was that I wanted to breathe out so badly, but I didn’t. Then I began to feel really, really, really, stoned. Like so stoned where you go insane stoned. I felt great so I just let the hit out and turned over to look at my friend’s boyfriend. He smiled his toothy smile with the tooth sticking back in the front and I laughed. And for some reason, it only got funnier and funnier! I hadn’t ever felt like this before, it scared me a little so I got panicky. Something whispered to me. I stopped and listened.
The voice inside my head sounded like my mother’s voice if she had been underwater, but I listened intently anyways. The voice seemed to be telling me to do things, but what? All it could seem to say was nonsense. She was telling me something along the lines of how one might explain to someone how to put together pieces of a boat on an assembly line, something along the lines of, “Put the neepneep on the negalgasloth, then put the archamogo on the jibbersplatter…etc..” The thoughts cluttered my head and I could seem to think clearly at all except for this pulsating feeling, just pulsating. Like I felt like I was pulsating and the world around me seemed to be doing it at the same speed. I looked up trying to ignore the voice, and watched my friend and her boyfriend talk about which of them wanted to hit it next. I couldn’t even begin to fathom why they were arguing, so I decided to speak up and say something.
“Hey you guys, stop…” I thought I had said this clear as day but apparently (according to them), it was all a complete mumble and they said that part of it only came out as a strange bit of nonsense. (*They told me that later) The feeling of the voice just kept getting stronger and stronger and I got more and more panicked. I began to moan and then everything got extremely fast paced as the car began to just implode in on its self and on me. My mind raced, “I have to get out of here!” my instinct was dead on so I jumped out of the car just in time and landed in the parking lot. I sniffed the air like a wild animal, something strange was definitely afoot. Then I distinctly remember running over into a baseball field and then back to the car and jumping back in.
By that time I was hot and sweaty from the summers sun and heat, and not to mention exhausted from running. I jumped in and out of the car several more times, because the motherly voice in my head commanded me to do so, “Or,” it said to me “I will never let you have anymore of this drug again!” I realized that seemed like a strange thing of my mother to say, so I slowly got back in the car for the fourth or fifth time and leaned forward to talk to my friend, pulsating all the while. But I couldn’t see my friend, it was as though she had disappeared off the face of the earth all together! But then, out of the corner of my eye, I spied her leg, relieved, I tried to look on but discovered that my perspective stopped there. It was something like a Charlie Brown cartoon really, where I couldn’t see her upper body, or make out any of the words she was saying, so I looked to her boyfriend.
He looked different somehow… He looked like… like…. Like he belonged in that movie “A Scanner Darkly” and then I thought that’s where I might be at the exact moment because that everything seemed to look that way. Like a huge, ugly, flawed, sketchy, anime cartoon projected with a projector in front of me. I compare this hugely to the drive ins. I looked up at the dashboard or actually the dashboards plural. The dashboard appeared to have grown another panel or so, so that now I was looking at the drivers seat and two passenger seats all in a row. Imagine that. Three chairs in the front of a little tiny Jeep Cherokee. That blew my mind a little so I looked onwards.
Suddenly, there was a welcome change!
The voice inside my head seemed to be being drowned out with what sounded like applause? Could it be? Then another voice took its place… The voice of Bob Barker… I was on a game show inside the car. Someone held a boom and a tiny, old fashioned 60’s microphone to my lips and I looked at the little air conditioning unit beside my friend’s leg. It pulsated and moved a little but I could see it clearly enough to focus in on the letters above the red and blue color.
“Wait a second here…” I thought to myself as I began to read all the letters, “BK, EL, LA, BB, what the hell?” The letters made no sense for an air conditioning unit, so I dismissed the matter and went back to the game show which was already choosing its contestants inside my head. At this point I began to go wild in the car hoping that I would be chosen. It was like being in two separate places at the same time. I was jumping around in my friend’s car, and I was jumping around on a show not unlike The Price is Right. I struggled with this emotion a moment then just let it consume me, not caring anymore. I looked again.
My friend’s leg was still there and the scenery transformed yet another time. It was some straight outta Scarface shit. There was this large purple puff ball, sitting on the third seat down in the front row that had manifested earlier, smoking a Camel cigarette and laughing like it was the devil. Again, I did not get to see its face, and I compared this to a movie I saw once when I was young called “The Lorax.” The movie is a classic Dr.Seuss about pollution, in which a thing comes to the forest and you never see its face, only its hands and feet.
I figured that was definitely what was talking to me at the time, so I leaned in closer to hear what was to be heard. It laughed, deep and slow, like that second grade principal who used to scare the pants off me, or my pedophile uncle who I would only have to see once a year, but I would dread the moment. With each laugh came and smoke circle, until he finally coughed and took another drag of his cigarette. He cleared his throat and told me that I was to kill ten men and then report back to him with their scalps.
I was completely freaked out by the idea so I got out of the car once more and ran to a picnic table a few feet away. I stood about 15 feet away from it and looked up as it grew until it was 10 stories tall. This freaked me out as well, so I walked slowly backwards, back to the car and leaned in the rolled down window on the passenger’s side, right beside the extended dashboard. I looked in again, to see the three seats and the two pairs of legs dangling in midair. So I whispered to the pair of legs that was my best friend, “Dude, I’m freakin out!” But what came out of my mouth sounded like a pulsated voice that belonged to a robot, not me.
This puzzled me so I got back into the car and relaxed on the backseat thinking about the whole purple puffball business, and the pulsating, and how I should always trust this herb guy to hook me up with the stuff I’ve never heard of. Then I began to come down, to a point that I just felt stoned, but less tired. I wanted to sleep but my friend’s wouldn’t let me and I really couldn’t so I just sat there until everything stopped swirling.
Once I felt like I could talk again, the first words out of my mouth were, “Dude…… Wowwwwww….” This is a typical response for me to most hallucinogens. It wasn’t like an acid trip, it was just an experience that I had never experienced and it baffled me to no end. When my friends asked me what I saw, I tried to explain, but couldn’t. This is about the best explanation I can come up with.
I have tried to do Salvia several times since then, all with low dose effects. Each time the one effect I noticed that always came to me right away was the pulsating effect with the screaming female voice inside my head telling me how to run a assembly line. I’m not sure why this happens, it just always does. I didn’t trip as much as I had that first time, but I am determined to again, and even more so, because I hear that Salvia trips can be ten times more intense and amazing, then the minor thing I experienced.
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