Citation: Perry. "Just Another Ant In The Colony: An Experience with H.B. Woodrose (exp61877)". Erowid.org. Jul 14, 2017. erowid.org/exp/61877
At about 9:45 in the morning two days ago, I crushed up 15 Woodrose seeds. I put them in cold water with a squirt of lemon juice with the intentions of doing the no barf method. After about 20 minutes I felt nothing, so I figured I got a bad strand of seeds. Silly me, I decided to just swallow the seeds.
I fired up a few computer games to kill time before the stuff kicked in, however it became hard to concentrate and my stomach began to get upset.
From here on out I am just going to copy and post what I wrote while coming down from the substance.
I was by myself, but I felt my preparations could keep me strong.
About 20 minutes after consumption my stomach turned topsey turvey and I began to feel nauseous, however I did not feel 'sick'. About 40 minutes in I puked up everything in my stomach, but after doing so I can't convey the emotion I felt. I felt as though I overcame fucking death, and I turned the puking into an entity at which I could insult and triumph over it like a Trojan would to an enemy after a victory. For about an hour I was bed ridden and could do nothing but watch TV.
I did not go into this experience wanting to 'get fucked up'. I went into it wanting to grow mentally, and I believe I took a journey and am satisfied with what I achieved. There was a moment where I had a feeling of pure insignificance. I felt that the seeds I took symbolized nature as a whole and it was punishing me for my ignorance. I felt that what I did was an abuse of another drug, and that I could not handle the truth it was to bring to me. I was quickly slipping away and I wanted to just give in to nature's power. I tried to sleep but nature was always there, destroying me, stripping me of my self, and reveling to me that I was just another ant in a colony. No matter how hard I tried to give up I could not, and nature was always there to break me down. I tried listening to music but nature was still there. No matter how hard I tried to think, I could not think of anything positive.
I really wanted to reach out to someone but I did not know how. C was kind enough to come all the way out and pick me up. Before Cís arrive I had a lot of time to burn. I was still feeling that the nature entity was destroying me, but slowly a ray of help came inside me. I kept explaining to myself what in my conscious mind I thought was good, and that seemed to help a little. I got in my hot tub and looked around. Awe struck I finally came to grips with nature. The sunlight was baring down on me, the wind flying through air the and a squirrel on the fence near me. The joy and euphoria that overcame me is beyond explanation. I was thankful for everything, because nature was not destroying me, I was part of nature, I had been destroying myself. I also touched upon time, which seems to be a center of attention for me on psychedelics.
Think about this, if one could change the rate at witch they perceive the world around them, does one see time as slower? So if one perceives a ball flying at them at a much faster rate then another person, then does that ball go slower for that one person? Hard to write, please talk to me about it.
I realized how much I loved my mom and dad, and felt bad that my room was messy so I went and cleaned it. I feel that from now on I need to make more of a commitment to my parents, because they commit so much to me. Parents give so much care, it is our place to return it.
A lot more happened today, I went out with some friends, battled more nausea, came back home. I feel fine now, no side effects, maybe a little withdrawn. Talked with my mom so on. I feel very personal right now, and there is a lot I can't talk about because its still being formulated. One thing that really touched me was the power of nature. Nature is not just a subject we lump a bunch of stuff with. Nature is in all of us. There is an entity within us all that never manifests itself. It stays hidden and we suppress it. I say look to your natural side. Understand who YOU are. I found the side that is always knocking me down and I overcame it, I think it would help a lot of you to do the same.
One last thing, my friend just did this stuff, and he tripped for the whole day and well into the night. He could still be tripping for all I know. This stuff is powerful!
COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.