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Why Sally? This is Madness!
Salvia divinorum (10x extract)
by Gekin
Citation:   Gekin. "Why Sally? This is Madness!: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (10x extract) (exp57140)". Erowid.org. May 27, 2009. erowid.org/exp/57140

 
DOSE:
165 mg smoked Salvia divinorum (extract - 10x)

BODY WEIGHT: 145 lb


Last night, the night of November 2nd, 2006, I had my first definite encounter with Salvia Divinorum (10x extract, standardized). I am going to journal the events that happened that evening as best as I humanly can. While the majority of the events in my report will be very similar to those of other experiences, I truly believe that in no way is this a guide for others to learn about what to expect. I truly believe that the experience could be heavenly divine or horrifically soul-shredding. The trip outcome could be transformed to either--without mercy--by even the most infinitesimal factor, psychologically or physiologically. So with that said, I will not attempt to preach to new users on the dangers of this substance. Rather, I will merely attempt to inform the vast public of the events that took place so that they may make their own decisions (best decision is a well informed decision).

As for a little background information (not a lot but enough to give you a foundation for you to be able to better visualize the occurrences), I will start by saying that I have been an avid drug user for over 5 years now. As of late, I have been taking a zealous interest in dissociatives and hallucinogens. I have had some minor experiences with psilocybin and extensive encounters with large doses of dextromethorphan. Nevertheless, my participation in either of these two substances (or my attempt to mentally prepare myself for what may lie ahead in using this foreign drug) would not grant me the required experience to handle what Salvia had to offer. The whole process for wanting to try Salvia started roughly two years ago. At that time it was merely a legal substance which was apparently available in most local head shops. Two years then passed, however I still kept my eye on the plant. When I finally convinced myself that I had enough knowledge and willpower to attempt a drug such as this, I decided to ultimately go on with the process. I purchased one gram of 10x Salvia Divinorum extract and spent over five hours preparing myself mentally.

The time appeared to be perfect, so I prepared the water bong and filled the bowl with a fair sized portion of the extract. The dimensions of the amount that I placed into the bowl would most certainly resemble that of the very tip of your pinky, perhaps the size of a raw corn kernel. I sat down on a comfortable chair while soothing background music played. The lighting was dim and my senses were invigorated. I sparked the flame and held the flame over the bowl and immediately inhaled. The smoke was not unpleasant but definitely unique. I thought to myself 'Wow, this isn't too hard, I could smoke multiple bowls of this stuff!' The bowl appeared to be finished off but nevertheless I kept the flame over the ash and continued to inhale until my lungs could not fit another second of breath. Without delay I remembered to hold in the smoke for at least 30 seconds. So I counted in my head, 'One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, and nine...'

But I saw something outside the window. And at this very instant I put the bong down on the window sill and peeked outside. It was raining out. And it appeared to be very dark--in fact much darker than midnight usually is (how is that possible?). My mind was confused. Not only was I trying to figure out why everything seemed so out of place but I was also wondering what happened to the smoke I just inhaled. Why didn't I exhale anything? It felt as if when I inhaled, the smoke and the air were both absorbed into my blood by my lungs. At any rate, that didn't matter to me then. But god, that rain! That dark rain! It fell right on top of me, soaking my body and clothes. This didn't frighten me in the least, rather I was quite curious. It would be important to note that it was not raining, rather, there was snow on the ground.

Instinctively I attempted to pull away from the window sill but my arms and legs were stuck. I was being pulled into the window sill wooden frame. The force did not appear to be pushing me or pulling me into the wall, rather I was realizing then that I was actually no longer human. I was simply the wooden frame. I felt my body and soul becoming the simplistic, wooden, and inanimate object. My god! How amazing! The rain continued to pour down on top of me, and I could see my arms and legs as if they were a piece of wood that was sitting outside under a rainstorm... the water droplets forming many beads on top of the threads of the wood. My body also started to take on more vibrant colors. Not only was I wooden, but I was painted! A vivid and palpable array of paint!

While movement was not completely inhibited, I was able to move my head slightly to look outside. It was at that moment when I looked at the neighboring houses, that I saw something that I would never forget. The houses were wooden and plastic, much like I was, they also had a very human appearance, and they looked at me with a smile. The told me to look up at the sky. The dark rain fell down into my eyes but I managed to squint out the water droplets. I saw something that I will probably never be able to describe but I shall try my very best. Something was coming down upon me. This massive being or entity crept slowly down toward my house and it was very apparent that it was going to consume all of us. I asked the other beings around me, 'Why?!'

They smiled back at me and spoke to me with their eyes. They told me, 'Don't you know? This is our fate and purpose in life.' I didn't believe them! I couldn't! I screamed begging for mercy but what could they do? They were trapped just like me... unable to move or run away. One girl looked at me with empathy but I knew she was unable to do anything. The entity was creeping closer, only this time I could feel it pressing me in between the windowsill and the ledge. My head was pinned. Why? It was in this moment that appeared to be most mind-blowing. I truly wish to God that I could be able to describe this petrifying experience. Why was I simply born in this world to serve such a meaningless purpose only to be 'obliterated' by this unknown force? But my questions didn't have any importance at this time. All I was concerned about was somehow trying to break from this wooden window sill. However, the reality of it was I was a piece of wood. A piece of wood has no legs or muscles. So there I was. Helpless.

At last I was able to break free but I immediately fell to the floor. Soaking wet, I was laying on the floor in the fetal position crying. Will no one help me? I realized how much I had in my life. I was more than something so simple and common. I had a larger purpose to serve and I was not done serving that purpose. Looking up I had the most passionate hope to be saved and to be taken away from this anguish. The faces I saw earlier appeared above me. They looked down at me, still smiling. In harmony they all extended their arms and they lifted me up and above the misery and shadows below. They all laughed and were surprised that I was so upset (as if I was supposed to know that all of this was imminent!). I felt a huge amount of innocence and sadness as they were carrying me up and away from all of this. They sat me down gracefully on my bed, however, I did not want to lay there all wet as it was extremely uncomfortable. The beings slowly vanished through the walls like dust.

It was at this moment when all of confusion started to return to order. The pressure was no longer present, and I started to realize that these beings brought me back to my bedroom. I was so incalculably relieved! Thank you god! Bless you for giving me a second chance in life. I was hot and wet still (as well as enormously out of breath!) from this whole ordeal so I instinctively took off all of my clothes and went to look for a dry set. However I was starting to quickly come back down further into reality and I started to consciously realize that I had taken Salvia and this was all a hallucination. I slipped in an out of hallucinations and realities for roughly 20 minutes after this. I looked for my apparently wet clothes and found them to be dry. I put them back on and tried to watch television and listen to familiar music to help me keep in contact with what I know was real.

Like the calm after a massive storm I was feeling colossal peace and thankfulness. I rested in bed becoming one with myself and my surroundings. I have not slept that peacefully since a child. There were also very unique and pleasurable physical after-effects. They could be compared to that of a very intense (but remember, also very rare) cannabis high. A lingering feeling of being seamlessly and slowly meshed in with whatever I was in contact with. To give you a simple example, if I were to lie down on my bed afterwards, it would feel as if I was becoming one with the bed. I was merging into a simplistic--yet comfortable--form.

I am writing this roughly 15 hours after the occurrence and I am in a deep and constant state of thought (peaceful, too). I still have no concrete idea on what happened or what to think of it all. Perhaps it was merely a chemical physiological episode... regardless, it was so real. I'll need time to think it all over. Will I ever do it again? I cannot say just yet. Was I regretful of the experience? I don't believe so! I was shown something so powerful and intense, yes, but I think that I was being taught. And if the purpose of the lesson was to make sure I was paying attention, well you have my undivided attention!

Exp Year: 2006ExpID: 57140
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: May 27, 2009Views: 41,615
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Salvia divinorum (44) : General (1), First Times (2), Difficult Experiences (5), Entities / Beings (37), Alone (16)

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Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.


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