Citation: Matt. "Ambrosial Beatitude: An Experience with MDMA (Ecstasy) (exp55702)". Erowid.org. Apr 2, 2009. erowid.org/exp/55702
||(pill / tablet)
Approximately 11:00 PM August 30, 2006
About half an hour ago I got a call from a friend who is into the whole ecstasy thing. Now, I was never really compelled to eat any ecstasy pills because of their notorious impurity. However, tonight, curiosity got the better of me, as usual. So he asked if I would like to buy some, after a thought or two, possibly three, I said sure, why not, what the fuck. So the pills are greenish, kind of teal. They are round with an omega sign on the front, the bottom is beveled, while the front is less so. My stomach is all but empty. All I had today was a snack bag of gardhettos, two cigarettes, and a couple starbursts. Come to think of it, Iím hungry. Anyway, I just got home from work about an hour and a half ago, so Iím tired, but quite content, I would say Iím generally happy. If all goes as planned I shall soon be ecstatic. Pun intended ,). I have next to me a bottle of water to refill throughout the night.
Just two observations so far, I am experiencing slight nausea, extremely similar to the nausea I experience before the onset of any psychedelic, noticeable, but not overpowering. This might just be my empty stomach. Also I feel slightly warmer that I should be. My room is quite cold at night, as my room is in the basement. Usually I have a blanket wrapped around me when on the computer at night, but I feel quite warm! A pleasant side-effect.
I was afraid I would not have an experience at all, because most positive effects I read about come from interactions with other people, and I am all but alone, my only companion being my faithful, ever-loving dog Chico a.k.a. Chic the sneak. Maybe we should call him C for privacy purposes. But I am definitely beginning to feel some effects. Nausea is more pronounced, lights and colors are very warm and bright. My hands and feet are sweating very slightly, which means my body temp is definitely higher than normal. My heart rate has increased approximately 10 bpm. Leather feels very good, so good, so cool, almost dark and mysterious. Now, the increase in bpm and sweating, I also experience those effects on meth. However the difference is that on meth, it is frightening, sometimes to the point that I fear for my life. But on ecstasy I am not afraid.
Oh I feel so incredibly wonderful. I wish I could share this feeling with everyone, this harmony with the cosmos, this ambrosial beatitude, this transcendent love radiating from me throughout the entire universe. This love that mingles among the trees and waters of the earth, and the songs of birds, beasts, and men. I was meditating for about twenty minutes before I remembered that I was writing report, lol. It was so awesome. I donít mean awesome as it is so frequently abused now-a-days. I mean awe inspiring. I mean so grand and great it tears me down to my knees in awe! Perfectly dreadful! Also, my jaw is clenching, which is quite unpleasant. My vision is slightly blurred, when I move my head a lot it is quite dizzying. Music is wonderful. Cigarettes taste wonderful, nice and spicy. I was rolling my cigarette, and got a bit of tobacco stuck in the back of my throat. For some reason I got the urge to stick my finger down my throat and get it out. I stuck my finger DOWN there. But I did not gag. This is an effect I have not previously heard of. Also I was rough-housing with my dog, and as I was rolling around on the ground, getting him to chase me, I scratched my shoulder on a nail sticking out of my chair. The cut is extremely deep. Blood is still oozing out, but it does not hurt. These two effects lead me to believe that MDMA has a certain analgesic affect. Iím going to get some peroxideÖ
Well, I definitely passed the peak of this experience. As I first begin to come down, I feel sad. I want to take another, who wouldnít want to experience sublime perfection continuously? To attempt to alleviate my sudden depression and disappointment, I repeated the words. ďI do not feel the need to repeat that experience at this time,Ē over and over again. This helped a lot. I donít really know what to say now. Before, I was so inspired to communicate my feelings in this report. But now, I donít feel the need to communicate with you ordinary experience, wake up tomorrow and go to work, and then youíll get plenty of that for yourself.
I feel sober as a brick, rock, or republican. Take your pick of adjectives!
After a bit of research I have decided to take another pill. I donít see any need to continue from here. Everything above is my experience as it happened, which was my goal.
Ecstasy is a grand drug. It is perfect, divine and utterly wonderful. It sure lives up to the name, ecstasy. This drug is special, so special in fact that I probably wonít partake again for a few months.
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