Erowid is a Global Information Resource
The Good and the Bad
Clonazepam
by Sike
Citation:   Sike. "The Good and the Bad: An Experience with Clonazepam (exp53872)". Erowid.org. Nov 7, 2008. erowid.org/exp/53872

 
DOSE:
  repeated oral Pharms - Clonazepam

BODY WEIGHT: 160 lb


After searching desperately for some sort of drug or chemical to legally treat my social anxiety, I came across a drug called clonazepam, or klonopin. When I discussed the possibility of trying klonopin with my doctor, he was hesitant to write the prescription. He informed me that clonazepam is potentially addictive, and my history of drug-abuse made the situation that much more questionable. But seeing that I was already taking paxil to treat depression and anxiety, and was still experiencing some severe anxiety in social situations, the doc wrote a prescription for 0.5 mg pills, under the condition that my mom hold onto the medicine and administer a pill only when severe social anxiety is anticipated (class presentations, parties, etc.).

The shit worked. When I was on the drug, I sort of had a ďfuck itĒ attitude towards my anxiety. I no longer cared what my words and actions may have meant to others. I felt no need to hold my tongue anymore. The feeling was what I believed to be the feeling that other kids, not suffering from much social phobia, felt. If I wanted to talk, I talked. And if I didnít want to, well then I was complacent with not talking, and didnít worry excessively about my peers seeing me as a loser for not talking. To make a long story short, it was a dream-come-true for a sufferer or severe social anxiety.

But donít get me wrong, klonopin had its share of questionable side effects. The first few times I got a pretty sweet buzz. I can best relate it to the feeling I get from valium, another benzodiazepine,a drunken, care-free state. I am a little giggly, and am not inhibited whatsoever. I could see now why clonazepam is habit-forming, but the relief it provided outweighed the possibility of addiction.

About a year after the initial prescription was written, I was prescribed 0.5 mg of clonazepam to take every morning. During the five or six months I spent taking klonopin on a daily basis, I maintained that ďfuck itĒ attitude towards my phobia, only without the buzz (tolerance kicked in quickly).

But towards the end, I began to experience problems with my memory. I wasnít blacking out and completely forgetting certain occasions, like one would after a night of heavy drinking. Instead I would forget small things here and there, and the occurrence became more and more common as time went on. Eventually, I was forgetting almost everything that had just recently come to mind. For example, I often thought of something I needed to get out of my room, and upon entering my room, I had completely forgotten what it was that I set out for to begin with. The same applied for the classroom, in that I would pay complete attention to the teacherís instructions for an experiment that was to be done, and when I was to conduct the experiment a few minutes later, I had no idea what to do, I only knew that I was doing an experiment. The memory issues became a serious problem. They annoyed the shit out of me and my grades began to suffer. I promptly took myself off the medicine as soon as school ended for the summer. I have not taken klonopin since then, nor have I felt the need to.

Clonazepam was a great drug. It did its job, and it did it well. But for me, it became too much of a problem to continue. I donít know that everyone would experience the same thing I did, but I do know that benzodiazepines are known for their negative effects on the memory.

Exp Year: 2006ExpID: 53872
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Nov 7, 2008Views: 73,055
[ View as PDF (for printing) ] [ View as LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Switch Colors ]
Pharms - Clonazepam (125) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Addiction & Habituation (10), Medical Use (47), Not Applicable (38)

COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.


Experience Vaults Index Full List of Substances Search Submit Report User Settings About Main Psychoactive Vaults