Citation: JGZotU. "Inducing Schizophrenia and Turning Off My Importance Meter: An Experience with Morning Glory (exp53506)". Erowid.org. Feb 15, 2007. erowid.org/exp/53506
I'm very happy to share my experience with LSA. I first heard about the possibility of taking 'LSD like' drugs legally a few years ago. I joined the military, however, and wasn't able to follow up on this possibility. Because there is so little 'scientific' information on LSA—as opposed to say LSD about which you can find plenty of clinical research--perusing a wide base of anecdotes seems like a very important first step, I'm glad to be able to add my piece to your search.
I purchased 1200 Heavenly Blue Morning Glory seeds from an online retailer. From the various accounts, it sounded like 600 seeds would be enough to guarantee an effect without getting too out of control, regardless of the strength of the seeds. I decided to go with a simple cold water extraction, because I was afraid of destroying or losing the LSA in the process of a lighter fluid extraction.
My friend and I were going camping, so about two days before we ground our seeds in a coffee grinder. I had read warnings not to let the grinder get too hot lest the drug be destroyed, but there seemed to be no danger of that with our grinder. We split the fine powder into two jars, and added about two cups of water. The jars then sat in my fridge for two days, with an occasional swirl to mix the stuff up.
I brought the following on our trip: a synthetic(non-absorbent) filter, some concentrated orange juice, Pepto-Bismal, and Ginger Ale. Of course, I was familiar with the warnings about nausea and the bad trips that would result. I gathered from my reading that if I filtered out the seeds I shouldn't have any stomach problems beyond the reach of Pepto-Bismal and Ginger. I used a non-absorbent filter because I feared that a coffee filter or the like might absorb some of the drug. I packed the orange juice because I had read vague recommendations towards including something to replace drained Vitamin C. So, to prepare my dose I put some orange juice concentrate in the bottom of my cup, tied the filter over it, and twice filtered the grounds with water.
After the preparation, it looked something like a very tall glass of brown orange juice. It had a very light taste aside from the orange juice which I could not identify, but it was not unpleasant. I downed the whole thing in two goes. I expected effects to begin within a half hour. Unfortunately, I became very nauseous. It wasn't the gut wrenching cramps described by some users, but that unsettling feeling you get when you know you're going to puke, accompanied by a moderate bloated feeling or a sense of overfullness. The Pepto and Ginger Ale didn't help at all.
I managed to hold it all down for about 40 minutes before I puked it all up, very forcefully. I had begun to experience some light visual effects, mainly the a slight dissociation whereby I could see the gravel but had a hard time seeing the gravel road, could see the trees but had difficulty seeing the forest, etc.
Now, we still had another 600 seeds of dose. So, my friend offered to split his dose with me on account of it being my project. I initially declined, but then decided to take him up on it. We split the dose such that we each had 300 seeds worth of juice. Same preparation, only this time I decided to nurse mine, to drink it slowly. He downed about 2/3's of his right away. About 40 minutes later, he puked his up, very forcefully as I had. I sipped mine up pretty evenly over a period of about an hour and had no further digestive difficulties. All times noted reflect time since I began drinking the second dose of 300 seeds.
I'll break my experience up into four stages. For the first three stages, which comprised perhaps 12 hours, I'll say I was high. For the final stage, I was effected and still a bit delusional but more or less myself.
Stage 1 began around 2 hours after I began my redosage. I was waiting for effects when I suddenly realized that I was pretty high. The effects were purely cognitive. It's difficult for me to describe them because I entered an entirely different state of mind, but I'll try. I reasoned that the part of my brain that assesses importance, particularly of thought, had been turned off. My trains of thought went on and on, I found it impossible to reach a conclusion or to direct my thought consciously to another topic.
When I tried explaining the effect to my friend, I was unable to get out more than a short phrase before I was completely taken away by wondering just how much background or context I would need to provide in order for him to understand. I felt that I was “descending into the fractal.” This metaphor arose from the fractal screen savers of the mid 90's, the ones where you zoom in on ever finer levels of detail, every time I tried to express an idea I zoomed in to a finer aspect of it and could not stop the process from going on and on. I felt like my thoughts were going around in circles, but without retracing any steps or arriving at any destination. I also found a great deal of significance in insignificant ideas, I think this was also an effect of my inability to properly attribute significance.
At about 4 hours in, I suddenly found myself unable to distinguish recent events in my memory from fantasy. The things that I had said to my friend became mixed with the thoughts of what I wanted to say to the point that I was unsure what had or had not been said. I turned to my friend at this point and said, “I am absolutely batshit fucking insane. You think I was insane before? You haven't seen anything.” I believe I was at my highest during this stage. I continued to have problems distinguishing real from imagined events, and certain aspects of our talk shone out with brilliant significance, as if they were they most important thing ever said. I had at this point regained some coherency of thought, I was able to pursue a conversation for perhaps two or three sentences, though I was still unable to express the breadth or depth of my thought before being carried away. I became very interested in developing metaphors for life in the things around me. Mainly, I realized that I was severely delusional as to the significance of my thoughts, and tried developing absurd yet interesting metaphors as entertainment.
Now I should bring you to a small aside about myself. I've got a rather fatalistic philosophy, I often feel that I'm just waiting for death, that I have little purpose in life. I also have very strong coping mechanisms, I may not have a purpose but I have a strong direction as well as a wife and friends who keep me happy.
That said, I began to focus deeply on this fatalistic philosophy. Again, and I feel that this was the most pervasive aspect of my trip, my internal importance or significance meter was completely knocked out by the LSA. I came under the delusion that basically everyone is depressed on a regular basis by the fact that they will someday die. I imagined that this must be something of a world wide conspiracy, that everyone finds for themselves at some point that life has no meaning or redeeming values, and that this is a truth that no one can share with anyone else because it is such a burden. I believed that though people could not express this idea directly, they put it discreetly into their music and art. It was a fairly depressing delusion.
I became increasingly concerned about the subjective nature of reality. I don't remember my specific thoughts, but I felt fairly incapacitated at the thought that there are no objective view points. I also felt alternatingly extremely close and extremely distant from my friend. I felt at some points that we were communicating completely without barriers, that we were very much like one person. I also felt at other times like we were two aliens, unable to ever really communicate because we shared no common ground, that we could never completely understand each other.
The third stage began around 7 or 8 hours in. I was continuing to gain coherency of thought, but I was still wrapped up in this delusion. There's not much to say here, we had gone to bed and I was just following endless trains of thought in my sleeping bag that made me even more and more depressed. I worried that after the drug had worn off the depression would remain, that perhaps I had achieved a sort of depressing enlightenment that would stay with me for the rest of my life.
At some point, I fell asleep. When I woke up just before dawn at about 14 hours into my trip, I was still somewhat effected. I was able to communicate without babbling on, but I still had problems framing my communication meaningfully. For example, I left the tent because I was too cold to sleep. The clothes that I had in the tent were too dirty to wear in the sleeping bag. When I returned with clean clothes, I told him that I wanted to go back to sleep now that I had, “had a drink and changed my clothes.” I knew he wouldn't understand, but I didn't know what else I should say. I was still pretty deeply under my delusion mentioned above, but I felt some hope that perhaps I would regain my coping mechanisms. As I walked about the campsite, I experienced a 'walls are breathing' visual.
It was probably 24 hours before I was back to normal, aside from exhaustion. I slowly recovered my sanity, returned to my wife, and got back to normal. Though today, only a few days after my experience, I still feel like death is a little closer on my heels, a little more present in my mind, I don't think this feeling will last much longer.
I came into this experience without knowing what to expect. I'd read a lot of documentation on LSD, and I was hoping for a similar experience. It's honestly hard to judge just what I got. I felt at one point that I was simply another sort of drunk, only that instead of being slowed in general, specific parts of my brain had been turned off or perhaps on. I'll stand by this. I think I now have a much better understanding of LSD and LSA. It made me dysfunctional by altering my brain function and tweaked my internal importance meter such that I thought and experience was more significant than it really was. At this point, I have no further desire to try this drug again.
Of course, I realize I had what might be called a bad trip. I'm not discouraging anyone from trying it. I just didn't enjoy turning off parts of my brain while I was still behind the—metaphorical—wheel. I felt safe the whole time, however, I was never in danger of hurting myself or anyone else aside from perhaps some increased clumsiness.
My friend, who has a good deal of general medical experience, told me that I was acting distinctly schizophrenic. In retrospect, this might have been the most valuable thing I gained. I have a great deal more sympathy for the mentally insane, because I was one for about six hours. I had distinct, internally logical, and what seemed like significant trains of thought. I was unable to communicate any of it, however, because I could never take long enough to retrace my thoughts before I was carried away by another breeze.
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