Citation: Plutonium Boss. "The Dysphoria Drug: An Experience with Quetiapine (Seroquel) (exp52490)". Erowid.org. May 3, 2006. erowid.org/exp/52490
I have been incorrectly diagnosed with different mental illnesses throughout my life, ranging from ADD to Bipolar Disorder. After a great deal of research of the symptoms of various mental conditions I have concluded that there is nothing 'wrong' with me. I have a hard time dealing with people I do not know closely, even extended family. I avoid eye contact at almost all costs. I don't like to talk much, and I'm usually very quiet and introverted. When I get excited I unconsciously flap my hands around like you may have seen an Autistic kid do.
I have an IQ of 140+ and anger teachers when I raise my hand during class only to correct their mistakes. (What am I supposed to do, let it go? She was responsible for teaching the students of TWO school districts English and she can't even SPELL properly? I could spell better than that in 1st grade, and I'm not exaggerating.) I was born with a 'good' case of Asperger's Syndrome. And apparently I'm the only person qualified to give that diagnosis, seeing as the countless medical 'professionals' I've seen were completely ignorant. Especially my last doctor. My mom brought me to yet another one of these supposedly highly educated individuals for my 'abnormal' behavior. After several whole minutes of interviewing me and asking about my 'symptoms', (mostly being answered by my mom,) She returned with around 1.2 starter packs of Seroquel.
I don't remember the exact dosage schedule she prescribed for me, only that by the seventh day I was supposed to have worked up to a staggering 1200mg a day. In retrospect, this dosage is far beyond the amount any 'sane' doctor would prescribe, (the truth being that NO sane doctor would ever prescribe this horrible substance to anyone other than a violent insomniac psychopath,) and this woman should probably have her medical license revoked.
I won't even go in to how she made my mom suffer by denying her adequate pain medication. Anyway, the next morning I took the first dose, 25mg before school. I had been in class no more than 15 minutes when I suddenly became EXTREMELY tired and generally just 'down' and was unable to remain awake. Unfortunately for me, we had a substitute teacher for that class that day, and besides the fact that he made us do all our assignments seperately, (normally we do them in our designated groups and print them off en masse to save time and work, as this is a dual-enrollment class and it's not the teacher's problem if people want to be uneducated morons who fail his class,) he WOULD NOT allow me to sleep.
My normal teacher was very easygoing and would let me sleep on the floor as long as I completed the homework and satisfactorily and didn't blatantly disregard the rules. This was quite a dilemma, although I was not too aware of it at the time due to the quetiapine robbing me of my consciousness and my soul. Eventually the inhumane asshole of a sub got pissed at my being incapacitated and moved me to some desk by myself. I don't remember clearly, but I think I attempted to muster up enough strength and sheer willpower to feign an attempt at conscious activity. I didn't receive any disciplinary action for my 'insubordination' (involuntary incapacitation) although I'm sure he left a note to my teacher, probably not detailing the situation truthfully. Either way, I eventually got the ridiculous assignment done and turned in the following day. The rest of the day was fairly uneventful, as I thankfully had only one sub, and the quetiapine simply forced me to do what I was already likely to do, sleep.
However I fell into a deep sleep during my fourth hour class, and awoke half way through his fifth hour Wester Civ class, to great humorous effect to all but me. I hurried to my correct fifth hour classroom and had no problems. As I implied earlier, I have no trouble with schoolwork other than complete monotony, and because of this teachers either love me or consider me the bane of their very existence. Thankfully most of my teachers, including my fifth hour teacher, like me, because I am quiet, intelligent, and obedient (when it behooves me.) Needless to say, I never took the next dose. When I returned to the doctor and told her I refuse to take it because of it's terrible sedation, she actually yelled at me. She was on a major power trip and was saying things like 'I'm the doctor, I'm the one who went to medical school.
I get to choose what medications you take, NOT you.' This is how dangerous the idea of an authoritarian medical system really is. These ignorant fools are given a book and a little hands-on training and told to memorize some facts, and suddenly they are handed a piece of paper and become infallible gods. The truth is, that these people only know the very little that they see, they are not necessarily more intelligent than any other human, and that I and only I decide what substances enter my body, as per my First Amendment rights. I never saw that doctor again for obvious reasons. Not only did I come to that psycho for mental help, she completely berated and trivialized me based on an obviously worthless piece of paper and her ego. That is insanity. To summarize, this drug is concentrated coma in a pill. It was designed, and primarily functions, as an antipsychotic.
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